“It takes time,” said Ashok. “And access to the Hirana that I do not have. I sent Meena for the task, but…” He trailed off. “I cared deeply for Meena,” he said. “I wish you hadn’t killed her.”
“As do I, brother. I also wish she hadn’t tried to kill me,” Priya shot back. “That was your handiwork. I had no desire to harm her. But better her than me.”
“Yes,” he agreed simply. He looked at her—a long, assessing look. “I should never have kept you from my work. You’re not like Bhumika, to play at weakness. You have always been made of stronger stuff. Priya… sister. You’re not a child anymore. And you’re more powerful than you were as a girl. You can help me now, if you’re willing. Will you help? Will you find me the way to the deathless waters? You have access to the Hirana. Access and time—and more patience, I think, than Meena possessed.”
She had more access than he knew.
“Why not ask Bhumika? Why not try to find the way yourself?”
“There are too many guards for me to get near the Hirana,” Ashok said. “And Bhumika would sense my presence. She has no interest in helping me.”
His tone was suddenly cold, at the mention of their shared sister. But then his expression smoothed once more.
“I wanted you to be safe. Meena should never have touched you,” said Ashok, in a voice intended to weaken her anger, to crack her resolve like the fragile shell around a yolk.
“She should never have touched anyone,” Priya retorted. “But that is what your rebels do, isn’t it? Kill.”
“For a purpose.”
“Parijatdvipa kills for a purpose.”
“An unjust purpose, and you know that well enough.” He sounded eminently reasonable. She could not make him flinch, it seemed. “They want to maintain their empire, and they know that there is a greatness in us that they must suppress. They belittle us. They control us. They let us die of rot.”
“The rot,” said Priya, “is hardly the general’s fault.”
“Is it not? Some of us believe the rot is Ahiranya rising up in protest against imperial mastery.”
Priya crossed her arms. “That’s utter foolishness, brother.”
“Is it really?” Ashok said, an otherworldly light in his eyes. “Why else did the deathless waters begin to grant us gifts? Generations of temple children passed through the waters unchanged and then—us.” He held his hands before him, palms open. “Suddenly we had the mythic powers of the yaksa in us. Power in our voices, in our skin, in our souls. Suddenly the rot arrives. You think all of it without purpose? You think there was no grander significance to all of this?”
“And what good have those gifts done us?” Priya snapped. “I barely have any power at all.”
“But you’ve regained the strength you once had,” he said. “You’re almost what you were meant to be.” Imagine what more we could gain together, his voice implied.
She said nothing to that, a stubborn silence. She knew the Hirana had strengthened her. She’d felt it, when she’d lain on its rock and reached a hand to Sima. She’d felt it when she’d sent Meena toppling to her death. She’d sought that strength out.
And yet.
“I watched the thrice-born burn, just the same as you did,” Priya told him finally. “Their gifts couldn’t save them. Nor their strength.”
“We won’t make their mistakes,” said Ashok. “We won’t trust wrongly.”
“I shouldn’t trust you,” she replied. But she felt elated and furious and very close to tears. She couldn’t distrust him. She didn’t know how.
His expression softened. He reached out a hand—held it between them both, like a question—then touched his knuckles to her cheek.
“You’ve grown so much,” he said wonderingly.
“Time has that impact, generally.”
“Your nose is crooked. Did it use to be?”
She took his hand, lifting it away. He released her.
“You must believe me, Pri. I’ve worried for you,” he said, serious once more. “I’ve watched out for you, through other people’s eyes.” He didn’t look at Rukh. “Though it would have been easier for me to do if you hadn’t been in the regent’s household.”
“I only ended up there because of you.”
“I thought you’d leave Bhumika’s service once you were older,” he said. “She should not have kept you on as a mere maidservant.”