“Then I know what to name these.” He dipped his hand into his jacket pocket and pulled out a small brown paper envelope. He offered it to me. Hesitantly I took it and opened it. A half dozen seeds fell out into my hand.
“What are they?” I asked.
“Our rose. The one that we crossed in the spring. It took, and now we have these. A new breed, with any luck.”
“But you don’t know for sure?”
“I won’t until I can plant these and see what grows, but I’m fairly confident.” He cleared his throat. “I had been saving them for a wedding present. I had thought to name the new breed ‘Beautiful Venetia’， after you. Now I wonder how you might feel calling them ‘Beautiful Celeste’。”
Tears welled up in my eyes, and I closed my hand around the seeds. “I think that’s a fine idea. We can ask Mr. Hillock to plant ‘Beautiful Celeste’ here.”
I hugged my stomach as tears began to fall. I squeezed my eyes shut, but all at once I was no longer alone. Matthew’s arms came around me, one of his large hands cradling my head to his chest. My sketchbook and pencil fell to the soft earth as I clung to him and cried.
“I’m so sorry,” he murmured into my hair.
“I lost her and now I’ve lost you, and I don’t know if I can stand it any longer.”
He pulled away a little, the pad of one of his thumbs wiping at my tears. “You never lost me.”
I shook my head. “I became with child. Neither of us wanted—”
“I wanted you, Venetia. That’s all I wanted at first, and then when I found out that we would have a child… That day by the lake was the happiest of my life. I thought that finally I would have all that I wanted.”
“You didn’t think I’d trapped you?”
He laughed, sharp and a little bitter. “Far from it. I feared that you felt trapped by me, and what’s worse, I was glad. I had you and I never wanted to let you go.”
“What could you possibly want with me?”
He jammed his hands onto his hips, shaking his head. “You are the most stubborn, infuriating woman. I love you.”
“You hardly know me.”
He sighed. “I know that you have a sharp, determined mind, and arguing with you is like trying to break through concrete with a toothpick. I know that when you smile deeply, there is a dimple next to your right eye that creases just so. I know that you’re more comfortable in your gardening clothes than in a gown, and that when you fall asleep you turn to your right side. But mostly I know that I want to learn something new about you every day. I understand if that is asking too much. I don’t have much to offer, but I can promise that I do love you, truly and deeply, and will more with each passing day.”
“I don’t know if I’ll be able to have another child,” I said.
“Then we will be happy with just each other.”
“Your family won’t accept me.”
He hugged me closer, wrapping the ends of his coat around us both. “You are my family. Will I be met with resistance from your brother?”
I shook my head. “Adam will probably thank you for being brave enough to marry me. Although you might wish to avoid telling him of our affair, in case he has developed an old-fashioned taste for dueling.”
He smiled. “I’m a novice with dueling pistols, so I will take your advice.”
I paused. “Between the Melcourts, the doctor, and the servants, too many people know about what happened here.”
“We’ll move.”
“Are you sure you can give up Wisteria Farm?” I asked.
I could see the tightness at the corners of his mouth. I hated to think he would regret giving the property up, but I didn’t see how we could stay when the life we lived was so tied to the Melcourts’ goodwill.
“The roses are not exactly easy to transport at the moment, but we will think of something. Where do you want to live?”
I thought for a moment and then asked, “What do you think of America?”
“So long as I’m with you, I don’t care where we are. Now, why don’t we see about your things? Much as I don’t want to let you out of my sight, you can’t stay at Wisteria Farm until we’re married. There is a respectable boardinghouse for women in Royal Leamington Spa.”
“I’ll go there until the banns can be read,” I said, nodding at the practicality of his suggestion.
“Good. There’s just one more thing.”