Estelle and her family lived in the modest Ridgewood neighborhood, and as Ruth cruised slowly down the street, scanning the numbers on the small redbrick row houses, she was pleased to see flowers in window boxes and children throwing balls outside. It was a lovely place for Estelle to have settled.
When she found the house, she pulled the car to the curb and took a few deep breaths. She felt nervous, and it suddenly occurred to her that she couldn’t remember the last time she had made a house call. She walked with slow and deliberate steps. She needed to calm herself before she saw her former patient. Still, her heart raced when she reached the top of the small set of stairs and rang the bell. “It’s Mrs. Apter! It’s Mrs. Apter! Quiet, kids. Mommy’s old friend is here!” She heard Estelle’s unique singsong voice yelling over the noise of children crying on the other side of the door.
“Mrs. Apter! It’s you! It’s really you!” Estelle grinned at her as she opened the door with a toddler on her hip and another, slightly older, child wrapped around her leg.
“Estelle, after all these years, don’t you know to call me Ruth?” She smiled and felt suddenly calm as Estelle took her free hand to wrap Ruth in a sloppy embrace.
“Oh, Estelle, it’s wonderful to see you!” How different she seemed from everyone else Ruth had seen today.
“I’ve been wondering about you, Ruth! Hear from that husband of yours sometimes, but he never tells me anything about you! Would you be all right to sit with me in the kitchen? I have to finish feeding the kids.”
“Oh my, I’m so sorry, Estelle. Did I come at an awkward time? I thought you said four thirty was fine?”
“No, no! It’s okay. I just like to have ’em fed before Larry gets home. You know, so I can focus on him when he arrives? C’mon, follow me.”
“Can I help you?”
“You? You don’t need to feed mushy peas and carrots to a two-year-old. Just sit with me so I don’t feel like I’m not hosting you right.”
Ruth took a seat at the small square table in the center of the kitchen. She was proud of how much progress Estelle had made these past six years. Without her lobotomy, she might not be where she was today: a mother of two children, leading a regular life. Still, as Ruth watched her with the kids, she felt like she was observing a tentative new babysitter instead of the mother of two.
“Are you hungry?” Estelle noticed Ruth watching her carefully. “I can give you some crackers? Soda water? Oh, I am a dolt. Just wasn’t expecting company and then you called and . . .”
“No, no, Estelle, you don’t need to offer me anything. I’m just so happy to see you and appreciate you inviting me to your home on such short notice. Please, tell me how you’ve been.”
“Oh, me, I’m swell. Just swell. Married, of course!” She laughed as she indicated the children while showing Ruth the thin gold wedding band on her left ring finger. “Met Larry in ’48. He was a janitor in the school. Used to hide in the back of the auditorium and listen to me sing during choir. Didn’t care that I was a little off, you know?” She touched her head and then put her finger over her lips as if the lobotomy was a secret.
“Estelle, does your husband know about your time with us at Emeraldine?”
“Oh yeah, he knows. Teases me about it sometimes. But I won’t let him talk about it . . .” She cupped her hands and dropped her voice to a whisper. “In front of the children.”
“I see.” Ruth smiled. Estelle definitely seemed a bit simpler than Ruth remembered. Had she been this way at the hospital? Regardless, she seemed capable and happy. Was this all Ruth could hope for? Her spirits lifted. Perhaps she was being too critical. Maybe the prognosis for lobotomy wasn’t quite so dire.
The door opened and Ruth heard a man’s voice. “Stelle, where you at?”