She didn’t deny it, but she took a step back. “I work for you, Roman. We’re friends. Two people saved by God’s grace. That makes you my brother in Christ.”
He wasn’t going to let her get away with that. “I’m more than your boss or your brother, and you know it. I see it in your eyes every time you look at me.” When she turned her head away, Roman cupped her face. “Keep looking at me, Grace.”
“This isn’t a good idea.”
It was the best idea he’d ever had, and he wasn’t backing down. “The night you kissed Brian, I got the feeling you two were checking to see if there was any chemistry. Let’s see about us.”
Roman expected sparks, not a conflagration. Grace stiffened at first; then her body relaxed. He slipped an arm around her and pulled her closer, deepened the kiss. She tasted so good, he wanted more. She responded, and his body caught fire. When she pulled back, he didn’t want to let her go. She uttered a soft sound, and his arms loosened. Her hands clasped his shirt, her forehead resting against his chest. Her hair smelled like sunshine and spring blossoms. He ran his hands down her arms. They’d gotten their answer.
“I can’t . . .” Her voice sounded choked with tears. “I can’t do this, Roman.”
“We’re only kissing, Grace. I’m not going to do anything more than that until you’re ready.” She was still close enough for him to breathe in the scent of her. He could hardly draw breath, he wanted her so much. Slow down, Bobby Ray. Give her time to catch up. His hands moved to her waist, then down to her hips.
“Please.” She sucked in a breath. “Don’t.”
Which was it? When she drew back, he let her move away. He’d never had to coerce a woman, and he wasn’t going to now. With a little patience, they would get to where they both wanted to go.
Grace sank onto the couch. Her hands shook as she covered her face. “I have secrets, too, Roman.”
“I’m not looking for confessions, Grace.” Roman kept his distance until he had full control. Sitting on the coffee table in front of her, he took her hand. He lifted her chin. Her flushed cheeks and dark eyes told him everything he needed to know. “We have our answer, don’t we?” They were going to be good together—very, very good. “I think we should take our friendship to the next level.” He kissed her palm.
She relaxed slightly, her expression bemused, but hopeful. “What level do you mean?”
Roman held her hand between his. Was she shaking, or was he? He couldn’t remember ever being this scared, but her breathless silence reassured him. “More intimate.”
She looked momentarily confused; then understanding came. She slipped her hand from between his. “By intimate, you mean sex.” She spoke in a dull tone.
Why did she look so hurt? “I’m not suggesting a one-night stand. We can get to know each other better, see how things go.”
Grace stood and moved away from him. “I’m such an idiot!” She covered her face. “I’m a complete fool!”
Maybe the evening wasn’t going to end the way he hoped. “It’s the smart thing to do. Make sure we’re compatible. We’ll take our time and decide how far we want to go with this.”
She turned on him fiercely. “You want as little of me as you can have!”
“What are you talking about?” Didn’t she understand how he felt about her? “I want everything!”
“Everything? No, you don’t! You want the easy part. You don’t want the hard stuff, the things you can’t survive without real love, without God in the middle. You want my body, for sex, sure. But you don’t want the rest of me. The baggage I carry, the issues, the struggles, the insecurities, the pain. And you certainly don’t want Samuel!” She tried to step around him.
Roman blocked her way. Her anger roused his own, adding heat to frustration. If she wanted to let it all rip, so could he. “I’m not a youth pastor who’d make the perfect father. I didn’t even know mine. What do you want from me, Grace? Tell me!” When she started to cry, he felt ashamed. He put his hands on her shoulders, his voice softening. “Tell me.”
She shook his hands off, raised her head, eyes fierce. “I want a man who wants more than a friend with benefits!”
“Okay. Move in with me. We’ll work everything out.”
“It’s the same thing!”
“You’re in love with me, and you know it.”