Javier just nodded. It seemed unlikely that Jack’s worst fear would be realized—the army couldn’t force him into unending service, no matter what his string foretold—but after four years as friends, Javi wasn’t exactly surprised by Jack’s reluctance to be sent into battle, his instinct for self-preservation. It was the audacity of Jack’s proposal that was most shocking now. Switching strings? Was that even possible?
“I was thinking about how you said that you owed it to yourself to keep going,” Jack added. “And we both know that you ranked higher than me in class and in the field, so if only one of us could get the chance to really prove himself, it should be you.”
Javi was still processing, but he couldn’t just keep standing. His legs felt as antsy as his mind. He turned and started to run again, leaving Jack to catch up.
And as Javier ran, focusing on the rhythm of his breathing, he began to evaluate his options.
Jack was asking him to intentionally lie to the United States Armed Forces, to the very people who had educated and trained him. Not only did it feel wrong, it was definitely illegal. The STAR Initiative stated that any service member who refused to comply—to show their string—could face dishonorable discharge. Who knows what might happen to someone who produced a string that wasn’t actually theirs?
Jack was clearly out of his mind to propose something so ludicrous, Javi thought.
And yet . . . Jack did make a good point about all the time and effort that Javi had already put in, the nights when he sacrificed sleep to study, the days when he could taste the salty sweat and metallic blood in his mouth.
Javi had earned his shot. And now he had only a few years left to take it.
Javier’s feet felt weightless, carrying him forward, the endorphins pumping in his body. He knew that he would never be satisfied with the staid desk job that appealed to Jack. But without having a long string—or, at least, the appearance of one—that was all Javier would get.
He wondered what his parents would say to him now, if they knew what he was considering. That lying is a sin, no matter the motive? That they didn’t work this hard just to raise a criminal?
Or would they speak the same words as his graduation toast? We’re so proud of you, Javier.
By the time they had reached their front door, Javi still hadn’t spoken, and Jack nervously shattered the silence. “Obviously you should do whatever you want to do,” he said, still huffing from the final sprint. “It’s completely your choice. But I just wanted you to know you have options.”
Except Javi didn’t feel like he had options, he felt like he had a time bomb that Jack had thrown into his lap. There was less than a week left now before Javier’s appointment. Only three days to make a decision that his entire future hinged upon.
Javi shoved his key into the lock. “I need to sleep on it,” he said.
But he didn’t sleep.
He closed his eyes, wept into his pillowcase, stared at the ceiling, lay flat on his stomach, and flipped from side to side, but sleep never came. What did come were drowsy and delirious visions, fed by the echoing of Jack’s offer in his mind.
The worst was when Javi imagined his own funeral. The colors of the American flag draped across his coffin appeared even more vivid against the black of the mourners’ outfits. The flag would be the only consolation for his parents that day.
Of course, there would be talk about how he died. Perhaps the priest would tell the story if his parents couldn’t form the words. That was the part that Javi found himself rewinding and replaying as he shut his eyes and begged for sleep.
“The car came out of nowhere,” the priest said, shaking his head sadly.
Rewind.
“In the end, he lost his battle against the illness.” The same sad shaking.
Rewind.
“He was a good swimmer, but the waves were too big.”
Rewind.
“He was just sitting at his desk when the bomb went off.”
Rewind.
“He was a true American hero, until his last breath,” the priest said firmly.
For the first time, he didn’t shake his head.
Ben
The air-conditioning in Room 204 was temporarily broken, so Carl pried open all the windows to let in a breeze. But the summer night was still, too still, and the motionless warmth that filled the classroom seemed to lull the group into a more ruminant state than usual.
“I’m curious,” said Sean, “who still hasn’t told their family members?”
Ben raised his hand timidly, somewhat embarrassed, while Hank casually lifted his index finger, as if motioning for the check.