“He’s out in the barn. Why? Is something wrong?”
Alina waddled rather ungracefully to the pich where she was cooking a pot of borscht. Katya’s eyes flickered involuntarily to the spot where Pavlo had died, and the vision she’d been hoping to avoid returned. Pavlo, battered and limp, his beautiful eyes, open and staring at the ceiling. The coppery smell of blood flooded her senses, and she broke out in a cold sweat. Suddenly, she was there, watching Pavlo die all over again.
Katya shuddered and squeezed her eyes shut, willing the memory away.
“Are you well, Katya?” Alina asked, her kind face creased with worry. She put her hand on Katya’s arm. “I’m here to talk if you want.”
“I’m fine,” Katya said. How could she tell Alina that she could barely make herself get out of bed every morning? If she opened the floodgates of her grief, she would drown them both, so she locked them tight and went right into the reason for her visit. “Mama thinks it’s best if you and Kolya move back home with us.”
“Oh.” Alina furrowed her brow in contemplation. “I’m not sure. I’ll have to talk to Kolya.”
Katya had the sudden urge to press her finger into Alina’s forehead to smooth it, like Alina had done for her at Olha and Boryslav’s wedding. A lifetime ago, back when they'd worried about silly things like falling in love and getting married. Now, Katya spent her time wondering what she would eat each day and if the activists would tire of taking their food and finally arrest them.
Katya balled her fists. “Mama wants me to bring you home today. You know how she is.”
“Oh,” Alina repeated as she carefully lowered herself down into a chair at the table.
“She thinks you should be around women, because your time is near.”
“That makes some sense,” Alina said. “Maybe until the baby is born, but I’ll have to talk to Kolya first.”
As if on cue, Kolya entered the house. His eyes instantly went to Alina, oblivious to the fact that a visitor sat at his table. Katya could see the love emanating from him toward his pregnant wife. It made her happy that her sister had someone who cared for her so, but it also sharpened the knife that perpetually twisted in her gut. Kolya looked so much like Pavlo, and to see the way he doted on Alina… for a moment, Katya wondered how miserable it would feel for her to see their obvious love for each other every day, all day: a constant reminder of all that she’d lost. Ashamed, she quickly pushed the selfish thought from her head.
“Kolya.” Alina welcomed him with a warm smile. “Katya is here to make us an offer.”
Kolya regarded her, and she could sense him assessing her wellbeing. “Hello, Katya. How are you feeling?”
Ever since Kolya had found out she was pregnant with Pavlo’s baby, he’d become very protective of her. He made sure she and Mama always had plenty of firewood chopped so she wouldn’t have to do it and came by after work at the collective as often as he could to help with chores around the house.
“I don’t need special treatment,” she’d told him again and again. “I worked every day through the harvest, I still scour the woods for firewood for the collective, and I help milk the cows there every day. I’m not delicate.”
“I know that, but I must look out for you and the baby. Pavlo would do the same for me if things had turned out differently,” he’d said.
Katya nodded. “I’m fine, thank you, Kolya. But it’s not my offer, it’s Mama’s. She wants you both to come live with us, since Alina’s time is so close.” Katya left off the part about Mama wanting it to be permanent. She’d let her address that when she had them stuck under her roof.
Kolya ran his hand wearily over his face. Dark bags cradled his eyes. They’d all joined the collective at the same time, and he was working hard to maintain this home and help with Mama and Katya’s on top of everything else the collective required. Katya could tell the idea of moving didn’t appeal to him, but for his pregnant wife, he was giving it much consideration.
“Is this what you want, Alina?” he asked.
“It might make it easier for when I go into labor,” Alina said.
Kolya glanced back at Katya. “I suppose your mother wants an answer from you today.”
She nodded. “See, Kolya, you already know her so well. Living with her will be easy.”
He chuckled softly. “Go tell your mother we will be by this evening. If it will help Alina, then we will make it work.”