“I promise from now on that I will always stay and listen. I’m also sorry that I hurt you. That is the absolute last thing I would ever want to do. Can you forgive me?”
I had a hard enough time resisting him when I wasn’t allowed to be with him. Now that all those restrictions were gone? How could I say no? “Of course I can. But only if you forgive me, too.”
“There’s nothing to forgive,” he said as he started to slowly walk toward me. “It seems like we both run away from things that make us uncomfortable. I promise to stop, if you will, too. At least with each other.”
He got so close to me that it took every bit of strength I possessed not to wrap myself around him. “I kind of want to run away right now,” I confessed.
Camden reached up and put his hand on the side of my face, and I leaned into his touch. “That’s fine. Whenever you feel like you need to run, know that I’ll always understand. And that I’ll come and find you.”
I breathed his name, so thankful to have him here. “You’re really not mad that I lied?”
“Rachel, the things I know about you, the things I can’t live without, not one of those has anything to do with you being Sadie’s friend. I would still feel this way even if there hadn’t been any wedding. No Sadie and no Dan, if we’d met at a party or in a bar this thing between us still would have happened. I liked you from the first time we met and used my suspicions as an excuse to get close to you.”
“I used the NDA as my excuse to keep my distance,” I told him. “That and the whole not-dating-wedding-guests thing, which isn’t a rule anymore.”
“Good. But I think we didn’t finish up our truth game. There are some things about me you should know.” He put his hands on my waist, pulling me closer, and I breathed him in, happily. “I snore. I’m kind of a slob. I work too much.”
“Me? I sleep like the dead. I find cleaning therapeutic. And I work too much, too.”
“Maybe we can remind each other to slow down.” He touched my hair. “When we’re not in your office, maybe you can take this down for me.”
Anticipatory tingles shot through me. “Or you could do it.”
He kissed me on my nose. “Looking forward to it. Is there anything else you think we should say right now?”
“Maybe we should promise that we won’t lie to each other again.”
“Who wants a relationship based on honesty and actual communication? Ick,” he teased.
My heart beat so hard in my chest I worried I might pass out. He had gone for a walk, but I was the one who had abandoned him more. I’d flown across an ocean and an entire continent to avoid my feelings for him. Maybe it was because of my parents’ expectations, but I’d never been very good with failing or self-forgiveness. I held everything in my life to an unrealistic standard of perfection.
Maybe it was time to change that. To let myself be vulnerable with him. To take that terrifying risk. Even if he didn’t feel the same and ran off screaming. “Honesty is important. I always want to be honest with you.” I took a deep breath and then said, “I love you.”
And whatever I feared or hoped for, he surprised me, leaving me on that ledge alone, not saying anything. His eyes softened, his arms tightened around me, but for a nerve-destroying moment he didn’t speak.
Until he did. “I have something for you.” Then he reached inside his coat pocket and took out a tiny scroll of rolled-up paper and handed it to me. “Here. For your happy box.”
I was still so scared, so unsure, and my hands trembled as I opened it and read it out loud. “You make me laugh.”
What? Then he gave me another one. “You are so talented and brilliant.”
And another. “The happiest I’ve ever been is with you.”
“I admire you.”
“You are beautiful.”
Then there was one more scroll. “This is the most important one,” he said.
I pushed the edges apart and my voice caught as I read, “I’m in love with you.”
He smirked, like he’d made me say something I hadn’t already confessed to. “You love me.”
“You love me, too,” I retorted.
“Potato, tomato.”
At that I laughed and threw my arms around his neck, holding tightly to his messages. I was going to keep those notes for forever.
Him, too, if he’d let me.
“I really do love you,” I said, experiencing such relief at finally being able to express what I’d been feeling for him.