“She did a good job.”
“Yes. She sure did.” He pulls off his glasses and rubs his eyes. “I don’t deserve it, Erika, but I was hoping maybe I could meet your family sometime. Do you think there’s a chance of that? Someday?”
“Maybe.” I know it would make him the happiest man in the world to tell him yes, but I can’t do that right now. He obviously has no idea about the mess Liam is in. I can’t forge a relationship with my father with that going on. And I still don’t know how to feel about his confession. “I’ll be in touch.”
“Okay.” He gives me a nervous smile. “You don’t by any chance have a photograph of you and the kids that I could… have?”
I have wallet-sized versions of Hannah and Liam’s school photos. I slip my father copies of both of them. He spends an extra few seconds looking at Liam’s, his lips parted. He really did miss out. He would’ve loved being a grandfather to those kids.
And what would my life have been like if he had been in it? If he hadn’t done such a stupid thing and gotten himself locked away? Everything could’ve been different.
I glance at my watch and realize I’ve been here for an hour. I’ve got to get back home before Jason starts wondering where I really am. The last thing I need is for him to talk to Brian. So I tell my father goodbye and hurry back to my car. He insists on walking me downstairs, and he waves at me until I drive away.
I don’t know what I expected when I went to visit my father. I wasn’t expecting a lonely old man, that’s for sure. I have no idea if Marvin Holick really wanted to kill that woman or if he was telling the truth and it was all just a horrible accident. I want to believe he isn’t a murderer. I want to believe that more than anything.
But I know one thing: if he is a sociopath, he’s the best actor in the history of the world.
Chapter 56
Erika
I’ve stopped answering my phone entirely. I don’t know where people got my number, but I’ve been getting death threats all day. They keep getting worse and worse. People are calling me up, telling me that they’re going to kill me, my daughter, and especially my son. If I don’t answer, they leave messages. It’s awful.
To some extent though, I know how they feel. They blame me for what Liam did. I blame myself. It feels like there’s something I could’ve done. Maybe when Dr. Hebert didn’t work out, I could’ve found somebody else. Somebody better. Somebody who could have fixed him.
Or I could’ve done what Jessica Martinson suggested. I could have had him locked him up and then walked away.
But that wouldn’t have solved the problem. You can’t lock somebody up for their thoughts. I could have sent him away to school, but when he turned eighteen, there was nothing I could’ve done.
At half past six, my phone rings and I flinch automatically. I’m lying on the bed, watching the clock until Jason gets home—he was supposed to be home ten minutes ago. I had been unwilling to move from my safe cocoon on the bed until I heard him come in downstairs. But then I glance at the screen and see Jason’s name.
“Erika?” He sounds tired on the other line. “Hey. Listen…”
“Please don’t tell me you’re running late…”
“I’m really sorry.” He lets out a long sigh. “I’ve been putting out fires all day—everybody knows about Liam. I’ve had two investors back out today.”
My stomach sinks. I didn’t think this could get any worse, but here it is. We can’t afford to lose Jason’s income. We’ve got a huge mortgage and now Liam’s legal bills.
I grip the phone tighter. “How long till you can come home?”
“I’ve got a dinner meeting now, then I need to sit down with my staff to discuss the situation. I’m not going to be able to head home for at least two hours.”
“Two hours?” I’m going to burst into tears. I was barely holding it together, knowing Jason would be home soon. Two hours till he gets on the road means at least three till he’s home. And that’s if traffic has died down by then.
“I’m really sorry, Erika,” he says again.
I don’t want to be alone right now. I’m scared somebody else will throw a rock through our window. Or set the whole place on fire. Now that the sun has gone down, I feel especially uneasy.
“If you want,” he finally says, “I’ll cancel the meetings. If you really need me…”