‘How can I help?’ she said, smiling at him.
He relaxed. This was so very different to his first meeting with Aleisha. ‘I want three books please. Rebecca,’ he said, smiling down at Priya, ‘The Kite Runner and To Kill a Hummingbird.’ He said the last two so quickly, she, ‘Louisa’ judging by her name badge, asked him to repeat himself.
‘Re-becc-ca,’ he enunciated, quietly. ‘The Kite Runner, and To Kill a Humming-bird by Lee Harper.’
‘Thank you, sir. Let me check for you.’
Her fingers moved at the speed of light on the keyboard. ‘Ah yes, we have all of these. Let me show you.’
She stepped out from behind the desk. There were a lot of other people browsing, and he wondered if she had time to show them where to go, and still make it back to serve someone else. He looked around. All he could see were books, tables and staircases. Behind one table, piled high with paperbacks, was a young woman he felt sure could be Scout all grown up. He stopped in his tracks. Her face was exactly how he’d imagined it. She had short, messy blonde hair too. Was it Scout? How could it be? Scout didn’t really exist, no matter how much he wished she did. Priya tugged at her dada’s sleeve and pointed him towards the woman, a few paces in front. Her eyes wandered the bookshop, taking in every inch.
‘Isn’t this exciting?’ he whispered, more to himself than to Priya.
When he looked back at Louisa, she was far ahead of him, heading up the staircase. He shuffled to catch up, dragging Priya with him. He wondered why all the other browsers couldn’t see the characters walking among them, the ghost of Rebecca lurking in the corner, picking out the novel she was going to read on her beach holiday this year, and Atticus, holed up in the reference section, surrounded by big, fat, chunky books – Mukesh wouldn’t have expected any less of him! Why was no one else as giddy with elation as he was?
Eventually, they tracked down all the books. Louisa fetched them from the shelves one at a time, checking they were the editions he wanted. He nodded. He didn’t really know what that meant but as long as it was the right book, he was happy.
He passed each one to Priya. ‘What do you think? What covers do you prefer?’
‘What?’ Her eyes shot up at him, disbelieving. ‘These are for me?’
‘Yes!’
Within moments, Mukesh felt breathless, all the air squeezed out of him by Priya’s arms, hugging him tightly at the waist. The woman watched them, smiling, and Mukesh didn’t mind that he could barely breathe. He couldn’t remember the last time Priya had hugged him without her mum instructing her to.
When she finally let go, her eyes shot down to the books. ‘I like these ones,’ she said, running her fingers over the bumps and gloss of the covers, before clutching them to her chest.
‘Wonderful, young lady. Anything else at all I can help you with?’ Louisa asked.
‘Why these books, Dada? Were they Ba’s favourites?’ Priya said, between mouthfuls of cheesecake from the bookshop café.
He shrugged, shovelling down his chocolate muffin – a small drop of shame coming over him. He didn’t know. He’d never asked. Naina had always looked so preoccupied when she was reading. He’d never stopped to think that sometimes the book she was reading might reveal more to him than anything else. Only now that he’d started reading himself, now that he saw Rebecca browsing the shelves, Mrs Danvers sitting beside him in the Foyles café, eating a cream cheese bagel, or Amir and Hassan running up and down between the tables, only now did he realize how lovely it would have been to learn a little more about the world Naina had been occupying, the characters she’d been walking with.
He didn’t want to show his regret to Priya, when she finally seemed excited to spend time with him, so instead he said, ‘I think your ba read every book. She loved reading!’
‘I know that, Dada,’ she said, scrutinizing him. ‘But did she read these ones? Were they her favourites?’ She’d laid out her three new books in front of her like playing cards. Wiping her hand first so as not to get any cheesecake on her books, she stroked the covers again. Naina would always wipe her hands on a tea towel before picking a book up.
‘I’m not sure. But they are my favourites.’ He waited to see if that held any resonance for her, if she even cared at all. His little girl gave nothing away. She shrugged.
‘Can you tell me what they are about then? Just a little so I have the flavour, you know.’