This has got to be one of the first times since I started working with him that I can’t read him. I have no idea what he’s thinking or feeling, and that terrifies me.
And lucky for me, this is the first time I’m dealing with the “I kissed my boss” situation, so I’m navigating uncharted waters.
Desperately trying to act casual, I step over the “boulder” cushions and take a seat next to him while also giving us at least two feet of distance, in case he thinks I’m trying to make a move again. Learned my lesson; won’t be doing that again.
I bring my legs into my chest, mirroring his position, and hug them close while I stare at the fire as well. The tension is so thick, so uncomfortable, that I’m not sure I’ll be able to make it through the night unless we clear the air.
“Do you want to play cards or something?” I ask, noticing that the rain outside has eased up to a steady fall, something I wouldn’t mind walking in just to escape this moment.
Running in the rain all the way to the inn feels more tempting by the second.
“No, I’m good,” Ford says, his voice barely audible.
God, I totally ruined this entire night. Stomach positively aching, I say, “You know, I’m actually not feeling too great. It looks like the storm has let up a bit; might be a good idea for me to take off, give you some space.”
I go to stand, but Ford places his hand on my knee, keeping me in place. With a sharp intake of breath, I look up at him, confused, as his eyes meet mine.
His hand reaches out, locks behind my neck, and he pulls me closer until his lips are pressed against mine, but this time, they’re not stunned; they know exactly what they want. Tears fill my eyes as Ford kisses me.
Truly kisses me.
The distance between our bodies closes, and before I know what’s happening, Ford is lowering me down to the ground, his strong, domineering body hovering over mine as his lips explore and take simultaneously.
The humiliation, the fear, the raw emotions of the moment before, they all fade to black as I move my hand to the back of his head so my fingers can sift through his hair.
And then his mouth parts and his tongue swipes against my lips, looking for entrance. I brace myself as I part my lips as well and our tongues clash. He groans against me, his body pressing into mine as his hand grips my jaw, his thumb pressing my chin up, giving him a better angle.
I let him take control, not just because it seems like he needs it, but because I need to feel it—I need to know that I didn’t just mess everything up, that I’m not forcing him to do this, but in fact, he’s taking me into his arms, that this moment in front of the fireplace is actually meant to be.
He presses a small kiss across my lips.
Then my nose.
Then he lifts up a few inches and stares down at me.
“Fuck,” he whispers. “I never realized how much I’ve wanted to do that until just now.”
“Kiss me?” I ask, breathless.
He nods. “So much.” He leans down and presses another kiss to my lips. “It feels like I’ve wanted this, us, forever, but never truly understood that until you reached out and stunned me with your kiss. It was like you unlocked the door to feelings that I’ve kept hidden for, well, years.”
“So you weren’t disgusted that I just kissed you? I didn’t ruin anything?”
“Disgusted?” His brows pull together. “Larkin, I was fucking bewildered. I didn’t know you thought about me that way. I was reeling, trying to decide if that actually happened or if I dreamed it.” He leans down and presses another kiss against my lips. “But it’s real. So real. You want me, just like I want you.”
“So much,” I admit, my lungs working extra hard to catch up with my heart. “You saved me, Ford. You have been nothing but kind to me, and that kindness captured me. I’ve wanted you for a very long time, but I was afraid to cross that line, afraid to ruin what I have with you.”
The light from the fire flickers off his strong jaw and distorts the silver of his eyes as he studies me. Then he lifts up onto his knees, reaches behind his back, and pulls his shirt off, tossing it to the side.
My pulse hammers through my veins as his hands go to the hem of my sweatshirt. Well, his sweatshirt, his sweatshirt that feels so perfect draped over me. Without even thinking about what could happen after this, I shift up and allow him to take it off, leaving me in nothing but a simple purple bra.
Gently, he lays me back down and dips his head to place a few kisses on my lips, then my jaw, and then down to my collarbone. I suck in a sharp breath when his teeth nip at the swell of my breast.