Don’t get excited. It’s probably just a coincidence.
“Can I get you something to drink?” the waiter asks.
“Yes, we’ll have a bottle of S Salon please.” He closes the menu and hands it over.
I stare at him. Here we go again.
The waiter disappears, and Jameson’s big blue eyes come to mine. He takes my hand over the table again. “Hello.” He smiles softly, as if finally relaxing.
Drop arguing about the drinks. It doesn’t fucking matter who orders the drinks. “Hi.” I smile.
He dusts his thumb over the back of my knuckles as his eyes search mine. “How are you?”
“Good.”
Oh, his touch makes me weak. I just want to blurt out that I’m lying and that I’ve had a shit week and he’s the king of Twatsville.
We stare at each other across the table. It’s as if both of us don’t want to speak in case we break out into all-out war. “What’s this proposal, Jameson?”
He sits back, seemingly annoyed at my tone.
I grip his hand. “And I’m not giving you attitude. I just want to know what you’re thinking,” I say softly. “Stop being on the defensive with me.”
He relaxes a little, and the waiter returns with the bottle of champagne and opens it. He pours a little into the champagne flute, and Jameson tastes it. “That’s fine.” The waiter then fills our glasses and leaves us alone.
“I’ve been thinking about what you said last weekend.”
“And?”
He sips his drink. “I canceled my massages this week.”
I smirk as my eyes hold his; I stay silent.
“The thing is with me . . .” His voice trails off.
I wait for him to speak, and when he doesn’t, I squeeze his hand in mine for reassurance.
“I’m married to my job, Em.”
I frown.
“When I said I wasn’t looking for a relationship, I didn’t mean . . .” He shrugs as if lost for words.
“You didn’t mean what?”
“I didn’t mean that I don’t want to see you. I meant that I am a workaholic, and I know that very few women can deal with how much I work.”
“Jameson, I don’t care about how hard you work. I just don’t want to be one of many.”
He frowns. “Meaning what?”
“I’m not wired for one-night stands, Jameson. It’s not who I am. But I’m not looking for a deep and meaningful relationship either. You’ve misunderstood me.”
“What do you want, then?”
“I want to have a friendship with a man and know I’m the only person he’s sleeping with.”
He listens.
“And I most definitely don’t want to share you with a fucking masseuse.”
He rolls his eyes.
“And I don’t want you to roll your fucking eyes at me.”
He clenches his jaw, unimpressed. “Watch your tone,” he warns.
“See that?” I say.
“What?”
“This defensive shit. It has to stop between us. We can’t keep fighting over every little thing like we do.”
“You’re just as bad,” he fires back.
“I know, and I’m trying to stop it. Just now I held my tongue because you ordered my drink without asking what I wanted.”
“I’m used to being in control, Emily,” he snaps.
“So am I. That won’t change.”
His eyes search mine, and he rearranges the napkin on his lap as if he’s thinking.
“I’m not asking you to be my boyfriend, Jameson,” I whisper. “That’s not what this is about. We have a great sexual connection, and I want it. I feel like I have to have it . . . but I can’t, not if I know you have it with other women. I need to be the only one.”
“Fine, I won’t sleep with anyone else,” he snaps in exasperation.
“And?” I ask.
He rolls his eyes. “And you can order the fucking drinks.”
Chapter 12
I giggle. “This isn’t about the stupid drinks, Jameson.”
“What is it about, then, for Christ’s sake? Speak English.”
“I want you to drop being defensive with me.”
“I’m not.”
“Yes, you are,” I whisper as I hold his hand in mine.
“So are you.”
“I know I am, because I feel like you will walk all over me if I’m not.”
His brow furrows. “I would never walk all over you.”