I skimmed a thumb across her soft cheekbone.
My gaze found her ring and my throat tightened. Gianna’s words filled my mouth with a bitter taste.
I would make this girl want me, need me, love me, because fuck if I was going it alone.
“We are most alive when we’re in love.”
—John Updike
IT SMELLED LIKE FRESH AIR and expectation. A warm breeze flowed through the cracked window and I realized I left it open all night. That wouldn’t be good for Nico’s electricity bill, though I was sure he had enough money to power New York City for years.
I got up and closed the window, and then padded toward the bathroom. After I appeared halfway presentable, I headed downstairs. My feet froze at the base of the stairs, but unfortunately, this time it wasn’t due to a half-naked Nico.
A quiet “No” escaped my lips.
“Yes,” Nico said.
My heartbeats ricocheted like pinballs in my chest.
I glanced from him in his black three-piece suit to the white dress lying over the back of the couch. A cool rush of unease drifted through my body, but there was something else intertwined. A warm kernel of pleasure, of relief, expanding like a balloon. I didn’t realize that living with this man unmarried had bothered me until now—and it wasn’t because of what it would do to my reputation. As much as I loved the freedoms such a liberal world provided for others, my heart bled for the Cosa Nostra, for everything romantic, and for the structured walls of tradition. Also, the idea that he would grow bored and decide not to marry me had been a cold whistle of alarm in my blood.
I wanted to be married, to have a husband of my own, but the sunny, white picket fence dream I’d always envisioned would be marred by the shadows of other women. I couldn’t share. Not this man. The idea made me feel sick to my stomach, cut my breaths in half, sent an ache radiating through my chest.
“Why did you kill Oscar Perez?” I blurted.
Nico stood with his hands in his pockets as he leaned against the island. His gaze was as calm and deep as the sea. “Because you were mine.”
I swallowed the lump in my throat. I didn’t think he would lie about the question, but I did believe he’d evade it. I suddenly knew that this throb in my heart would be worse than any physical pain Oscar could have inflicted upon me.
“Maybe you screwed fate.” My voice was a whisper as I stared at the white summer dress on the couch.
I didn’t look at him, but I didn’t have to, to know that my words struck a nerve. The heat of his stare burned my cheek.
“There is no such thing as fate,” he snapped. “And even if there were, the last thing anyone would ever do is pair you with Oscar Perez.”
“The Fates would pair me with you? You’re no saint.”
“Do you want a saint, Elena?”
No, I want you. But I don’t want the heartache you’ll bring along.
“Nico, we don’t know each other . . . I don’t even know your middle name.”
“Angelo. Now, go upstairs and get ready. We leave in an hour.”
I didn’t move. “I’ve already picked out my dress, Nico . . . it’s perfect.” I sounded like a frivolous girl, but that’s who I was. He should know what he was signing up for. I wondered how he’d gotten a marriage license without me, but realized it was probably the easiest of illegal things he’d done.
“I want my wedding,” I said firmly.
“You sure you want two ceremonies with me? Looks like you can hardly stomach the first.” His tone seeped with irritation as he pulled out his phone to reply to a text.
“No, I’d prefer one. Next weekend. I’m not going anywhere today.” I turned around but didn’t make it up three stairs before an arm wrapped around my waist and my feet left the floor.
“We’re getting married today, Elena. Not tomorrow, not fucking next weekend. Today.”
My back was pressed to his front, my toes skimming the floor. This wasn’t exactly how I imagined a man would profess his desire to marry me; in fact, it was kind of rude and totalitarian.
I tried to fight my way out of his grip. I did it just so I could see how I couldn’t get away.
“Let me go, Nico.” Hold me tighter.
“You gonna take this dress upstairs and put it on?”
“You want a virgin,” I protested. “You chose Adriana over me.” I tried to pull his arm off me, but it was like trying to pry steel.
His laugh rumbled down my back. “Is that what you think? That I chose your weird sister over you?”