I stare at him, incredulous. “Are you being serious?”
He shrugs. “It’s not what I dreamed of when I was a kid,” he says. “But I’ve realized that I never really felt like me until I wound up on the Cape. Life doesn’t work out the way we plan, but maybe it works out the way it’s supposed to after all. You know?”
I nod slowly. “I think I do.” He made a decision to find himself, and he’s happy with what he found. I wonder whether I’ll be able to do the same someday. I’ve come to look at life as a series of closed doors; it hasn’t occurred to me until this moment that in some cases, all I have to do is open them. “I never knew all that about you,” I say softly, after a pause.
Gavin shrugs again. “You never asked.”
I look down and swallow hard.
We finally arrive at the address on Battery Place. I look up at the building, which has an older-looking brick facade and appears to be a dozen stories tall. It’s dwarfed by the buildings to the north of it, but there’s something about it that seems charming and traditional to me. I’m startled a moment later to realize it reminds me a bit of France.
“We’re here,” Gavin says. He smiles down at me. “Ready?”
I nod. My heart is beating a mile a minute. I can hardly believe we might be finding Jacob at any moment now. “Ready.”
According to Elida’s note, Jacob lives in apartment 1004, so we try buzzing that unit first. When there’s no response, Gavin shrugs and begins randomly punching units until the front door buzzes.
“Voilà,” he says. He holds the door for me as I enter.
Inside, the foyer is dimly lit, and there’s a narrow staircase straight ahead. I look around. “No elevator?” I ask.
Gavin scratches his head. “No elevator. Wow. That’s weird.”
We begin walking up, and by the time we get to the fifth floor, I’m ashamed to say I’m breathing hard. “I guess I should work out more,” I note. “I’m huffing and puffing like I’ve never climbed a staircase before.”
Gavin, who’s behind me, laughs. “I don’t know. Huffing and puffing aside, it doesn’t look to me like you’re in need of a workout.”
I look back at him, my face on fire, and he just grins. I shake my head and continue climbing, but I’m flattered.
We finally reach the tenth floor, and I’m in such a rush to see whether Jacob still lives here that I don’t even bother catching my breath before knocking on the door to 1004.
I’m still breathing hard when the door swings open, revealing a woman about my age standing there.
“Can I help you?” she asks, looking back and forth between Gavin and me.
“We’re looking for Jacob Levy,” says Gavin, after apparently realizing I can’t get words out.
The woman shakes her head. “There’s no one here by that name. I’m sorry.”
My heart sinks. “He’d be in his late eighties? From France originally?”
The woman shrugs. “Doesn’t ring a bell.”
“He used to live here, we think,” Gavin says. “Until at least a year ago.”
“My husband and I moved in in January,” says the woman.
“Are you sure?” I ask in a small voice.
“I think I’d notice if some old dude was living with us,” the woman says, rolling her eyes. “Anyhow, the super lives in apartment 102 if you want to check with him.”
Gavin and I thank her and head back down the stairs.
“Do you think we came all this way for nothing?” I ask as we descend.
“No,” Gavin says firmly. “I think Jacob moved somewhere else and we’re going to find him today.”
“What if he’s dead?” I venture. I hadn’t wanted to consider the possibility, but it’s foolish not to.
“Elida’s husband didn’t find a death certificate,” Gavin says. “We’ve got to believe he’s still out there somewhere.”
When we reach the ground floor, Gavin knocks on the door to apartment 102. There’s no answer, and we exchange looks. Gavin knocks again, harder this time, and I’m relieved to hear footsteps coming toward the door a moment later. A middle-aged woman in curlers and a bathrobe opens the door.
“What?” she asks. “Don’t tell me the plumbing on the seventh is broken again. I can’t handle it.”
“No ma’am,” Gavin says. “We’re looking for the super.”