My cheeks warmed. I still couldn’t believe that was what I was, but that didn’t matter at the moment. “You’re not just any wolven. It would be no one else but you.”
Kieran dipped his chin as a sweet taste gathered in my mouth, at odds with the bite of whiskey. “Don’t make me feel emotional about this. If you do, you’re going to make this weird.”
I laughed. “Well, it’s about time I’m the one who gets to make something weird.”
He shook his head as he clasped the back of his neck with his free hand. Several long moments passed. “You know I love Cas, right?”
“I do,” I whispered. “And I know he loves you.”
“I would do anything for him. I would do anything for you,” he said, echoing what Casteel had said. He looked up at me. “And knowing that you would do this for me means…” He swallowed. “There really aren’t words other than that my reasons for agreeing to the Joining have very little to do with Cas being a King or you a Primal god and everything to do with the love I have for both of you.”
My breath caught as a knot of emotion lodged itself in my chest. “Now you’re making this all emotional.”
“Sorry.”
“No, you’re not.”
Kieran grinned, lowering his hand as I fought the urge to ask him what kind of love he felt for Casteel. For me. I knew it wasn’t a familial one and that it went beyond what one felt for friends. I also thought that it wasn’t the same as what he’d felt for Elashya or what Casteel and I felt for each other. But I also knew that what I felt for Kieran wasn’t the same as what I felt for Delano or Vonetta or Tawny. It was…more.
He sat back, eyeing me as he rested his ankle on his knee. “You have that look.”
“What look?”
“The one that says you have a question you’re trying not to ask.”
“No, I don’t.”
Kieran arched a brow.
I sighed, thinking it was rather annoying that he knew me so well. Needing courage to ask what I wanted to know, I took a longer drink. It did very little to aid me. “What…what kind of love do you feel?”
He studied me until I almost started squirming in the chair. “There are many kinds of love, but when it comes to you, it’s the kind that allowed me to make that—” He inhaled sharply, his jaw hardening. “It’s the kind of love that allowed me to make that promise to you, Poppy. It’s the same kind of love that allowed you to ask that of me.”
Casteel
The bedchamber was dimly lit when I entered. Kieran’s scent lingered by the fireplace, where two empty glasses sat on a small table. Stripping off the weapons and straps that held them in place, I left all but one dagger on the chest by the standing screen.
My heart gave an unsteady leap when I looked at the bed and saw Poppy there, curled on her side, the blanket pooled at her waist and her robe loosened, baring one creamy shoulder. As I stripped off my clothing and made quick use of the cooled bathwater, I didn’t think my heart would ever stop giving little jumps whenever I looked upon her. Didn’t think I would ever get used to looking at her and knowing that I was hers and she was mine.
I made sure I was completely dry before stepping toward the bed. I didn’t want to wake her—well, that was a lie. I wanted to see those beautiful eyes. Have her gift me with one of her smiles. Hear her voice. Her laugh. So, yeah, I wanted her awake, but the morning would come soon enough. We all needed our rest, for the journey into the Blood Forest wouldn’t be an easy one. Carefully pulling back the blanket, I eased into bed and kept my godsdamn hands and arms to myself. If I touched her, then yeah, I would spend the night staring at the ceiling with a hard cock.
Forcing my eyes closed and my breathing to steady, by some kind of miracle, I fell asleep. I didn’t know how long I rested before I found myself in that musty and dark cell, scratching Craven claws and the rattling of chains the only sounds. The band at my throat was almost too tight to swallow or breathe deeply, and the pain in my hand and in—
I woke with a jolt, my eyes flying open to see shadows swaying across the exposed beams of the ceiling. I’m not there. My heart thumped. I’m here. Air wheezed in and out of my lungs as I repeated those words like a fucking prayer.
The bed shifted slightly as I dragged my hands down my face, feeling the roughness of calluses—of what was absent there.
Poppy rolled toward me, pressing the length of her half-clothed body against mine. “I missed you,” she murmured.