My aunt offered a tender smile. “I think that’s a wonderful and generous gift.”
I handed her the teddy bear, watching as she cradled it before reaching for my hand. “Now that you’re awake, can we talk about the adoption?” When I nodded, she went on. “You know you’re going to have to formally give the baby up, which means paperwork, of course. I’ve reviewed it, so has Gwen, and as I mentioned to your parents, we’ve worked for years with the woman who set up the adoption. You can trust me that everything is in order, or if you wish, I could arrange for you to have an attorney.”
“I trust you,” I said. And I did. I think I trusted my aunt Linda more than anyone.
“The important thing you should know is that this is a closed adoption. You remember what that means, right?”
“That I don’t know who the parents are, right? And they won’t know me?”
“That’s correct. I want to make sure that’s still what you’d like to do.”
“It is,” I said. The thought of knowing anything would drive me crazy. “Are the new parents here yet?”
“I heard that they arrived this morning, so we’ll take care of the paperwork in a little bit. But there’s something else you should probably know.”
“What is it?”
She took a deep breath. “Your mom is here now, and she’s arranged for you to fly home tomorrow. The doctor wasn’t thrilled by that because of the possibility of blood clots, but your mom was fairly insistent about it.”
I blinked. “How did she get here so fast?”
“She found a flight yesterday right after I called. She actually arrived in New Bern late last night, before you delivered. She came by this morning to see you but you were still asleep. She hadn’t eaten, so Gwen and I took her to the cafeteria to get her something.”
Preoccupied with thoughts about my mom, I realized that I’d almost tuned out the other thing she’d told me. “Wait. Did you say I’m leaving tomorrow?”
“Yes.”
“You mean I’m not going back to Ocracoke?”
“I’m afraid not.”
“What about the rest of my things? And the picture Bryce gave me for Christmas?”
“I’ll ship everything to you. You don’t have to worry about that.”
But…
“What about Bryce? I didn’t even get a chance to say goodbye. I didn’t say goodbye to his mom or his family, either.”
“I know,” she murmured. “But I don’t think there’s anything you can do. Your mom made the arrangements, and that’s why I wanted to come up here to tell you right away. So you wouldn’t be surprised.”
I could feel the tears again, different tears than the previous night’s, filled with a different kind of fear and pain.
“I want to see him again!” I cried. “I can’t just leave like this.”
“I know,” she said, compassion weighting every word.
“We had a fight,” I said. I could feel my lip beginning to quiver. “I mean, sort of a fight. I told him I couldn’t marry him.”
“I know,” she whispered.
“You don’t understand,” I said. “I have to see him! Can’t you try to talk to my mom?”
“I did,” she said. “Your parents want you to come home.”
“But I don’t want to leave,” I said. The thought of living with my parents again, not my aunt, wasn’t something I could face right now.
“Your parents love you,” she promised me, squeezing my hand. “Just like I love you.”
But I feel it with you more than I do with them. I wanted to say that to her, but my throat locked up and this time, I simply gave in to the sobbing. And, just as I knew she would, my sweet and wonderful aunt Linda held me tight for a long time, even after my mom finally entered the room.
*
Manhattan
2019
“Are you okay? You look troubled.”
Maggie watched as Mark set the eggnog in front of her. “I was remembering the next morning at the hospital,” Maggie said. She reached for the glass while he took his seat again. When he was settled, she told him what had happened, noting his dismay.
“And that was it? You didn’t return to Ocracoke?”
“I couldn’t.”
“Did Bryce make it to the hospital? Couldn’t he have caught the ferry?”
“I’m sure he thought I’d be coming back to Ocracoke. But even if he had figured it out and made it to the hospital, I can’t imagine what it would have been like with my mom there. After my aunt and Gwen left, I was devastated. My mom couldn’t understand why I kept crying. She thought I was questioning the decision to give up the baby for adoption, and even though I’d already signed the papers, I think she was afraid that I was going to change my mind. She kept telling me that I was doing the right thing.”