‘Why do you think that was?’ Dr Shearer said.
Tully didn’t know. Suffice to say, she didn’t care about beating Rachel at anything now.
‘Go back to your childhood,’ Dr Shearer said. ‘This stuff is actually very important. What happens in our childhood shapes us – our ability to relate to people, to manage our emotions, to control our impulses. There’ll be a reason you felt competitive with your sister as a child, just as there’ll be a reason that competitiveness has subsided.’
Tully thought harder, trying to unearth some significant childhood memories. Funnily enough, all the ones that presented themselves featured her dad’s voice.
Come on, Tully! You can beat her. She has the strength but you’re faster.
You can ride your bike faster than that. Rachel can do it and she’s younger than you.
Rachel climbed that tree all the way to the top. How high did you climb?
Sure, he’d been a competitive dad, but Tully had been fine with it, because he was usually on her side. Often, during a race, he’d even manoeuvre himself in front of Rachel to slow her down. Once, he even tripped Rachel when it looked like she was going to beat Tully. Later, when Dad was putting her to bed, they’d laughed about it. Tully felt like it was a little secret between them. A few weeks later, though, Tully found she didn’t find it so funny. Because, that time, she could have sworn that her dad tripped her.
32
RACHEL
Rachel was delivering a cake to a client. She liked to do that from time to time – it made her nostalgic for the early days of her business, when she used to personally deliver every item to the client. And there was no doubt she felt a certain spring in her step today. She and Darcy had spent most of the previous few days kissing like teenagers. That was as far as she was ready to take it – which felt embarrassing and strange for a thirty-five-year-old woman. Darcy seemed perfectly happy with the arrangement, so for now Rachel wasn’t going to question herself. She also wasn’t going to question the fact that, after he left this morning, she opened and finished a small block of chocolate.
Where I come from we call that survival.
Today she was delivering a birthday cake in the shape of a football. Rachel had assumed it was for a child until she received the instructions from Nancy, the man’s wife. Please write: Happy 72nd birthday, Jimmy.
‘I take it Jimmy is a football fan?’ Rachel asked, when Nancy arrived at the door. There was, Rachel noticed, no sign of a party underway.
‘He most certainly is,’ Nancy said. ‘He played for the Hawks for twelve years. But that was a long time ago.’
‘No way! I’m a Hawks fan.’
‘Naturally – they’re the best team,’ Nancy said with a wink. She opened the box. ‘Ah, look at this. It’s perfect. He’ll love it.’
‘Are you having a party?’
‘Well, no. Jimmy isn’t a big fan of crowds these days. He has dementia, you see.’
‘I’m sorry to hear that.’
Rachel thought about adding that her mum did too, but she held it back. So often when she told someone about Mum’s dementia they interrupted, desperate for her to know about their mum, their friend, their husband who also had it. Sometimes it was nice to keep the attention on the person who was sharing.
‘We think it was the football,’ she said, lowering her voice. ‘So many falls and knocks to the head. I can’t even count the number of times he was in hospital for concussion.’
‘And you think that caused the dementia?’
Nancy shrugged. ‘They don’t know for sure. But there is a proven link between repeated head trauma and dementia later in life.’
‘Really?’ Rachel thought of her mother. The head injuries she had sustained over the years from various trips and falls. I’m so clumsy, Mum always used to say. Always tripping or stumbling on something. ‘I didn’t know that.’
Nancy smiled sadly. ‘You see a lot of these ex-sportspeople developing symptoms in their fifties and sixties. They think they’re invincible when they’re young, but then it turns out they aren’t.’
‘I know what you mean,’ Rachel said, then added, ‘I hope Jimmy enjoys the cake.’
Nancy thanked her again, and then shut the door. But as Rachel made her way back to the car, she realised something. Despite her mother being notorious for clumsiness, Rachel had never seen her stumble. Not once.
33
HEATHER
‘Look, Miles!’ Stephen said. ‘Bluey has come to your party!’