Sometimes life just wasn’t fucking fair.
She slugged me in the shoulder. “What is wrong with you?” she hissed. “Our families are right up there!”
“A whole lot of things,” I said with a grin.
“You’re the worst. We’re coming!” she yelled.
“We will be later,” I promised under my breath.
TWENTY-SIX
PMS AND THE BULLY
Naomi
I arrived at Honky Tonk early for my shift in my Dad’s pristine Ford Explorer. A bonus to having my parents in town. Another bonus was the fact that they were having a movie night sleepover with Waylay at Liza’s.
I was under orders to buy a car ASAP.
Between my poker winnings and the proceeds from the sale of my house, I found myself in a pretty solid financial position even with the impending purchase of a decent car. Then there was the quickie Knox had coaxed me into that afternoon when he came over to help me put together Waylay’s new desk.
I was feeling pretty damn good about life when I strolled into Honky Tonk. “Hello, ladies,” I said to Fi and Silver. “You’re looking gorgeous today.
“You’re early and in a good mood,” Fi noted, sliding the cash drawer into the register. “I hate that about you.”
Silver glanced my way as she flipped the stools off the bar. She paused. “She’s got orgasm face. She’s not one of us.”
Crap. The last thing Knox or I needed was our co-workers gossiping about our incredibly satisfying sex life.
“Oh, come on,” I scoffed, hiding my face behind a curtain of hair as I tied my apron. “A girl can be in a good mood without having orgasms. What’s with the chocolate and heating pads?”
Next to the register was a plate of brownies wrapped with pink cellophane, a box of stick-on heating pads, and a bottle of Midol.
“Knox’s monthly care package,” Silver said. “Who gave you the O face?”
“Care package for what?” I asked, ignoring the question.
“All our cycles synced up. Stasia’s too,” Fi explained. “Every month, the boss puts together a period survival kit and is nice to us for a day or two.”
“That’s really nice of him,” I said.
Fi slapped the bar. “OhmygodyouhadsexwithKnox!”
“What? Me? Knox?” I felt my face getting hot. “Why would you think that? Can I have a brownie?”
“She’s definitely deflecting,” Silver decided.
“Yeah, Nomi. Your poker face needs some serious work. This is so fucking exciting. You know he’s never shagged an employee before. Man, I knew there were sparks! Didn’t I tell you there were sparks?” Fi slapped Silver in the shoulder.
“Yeah. Sparks,” Silver agreed. “So are you guys a thing? Or was it a heat-of-the-moment, my-brother’s-just-been-shot kinda thing?”
“On a scale of Meh to My Vagina is Forever Ruined, how good was he?” Fi asked.
This was not going the way I’d planned. My gaze slid to the kitchen doors and back to the expectant faces before me. News traveled fast in this town, and I did not want to feed the gossip.
“You guys, I really don’t want to talk about this.”
They stood there staring at me. Then they looked at each other and nodded.
“Okay, here’s how it’s gonna go,” Fi said. “You’re going to tell us everything, and in exchange, we won’t tell anyone anything.”
“Or else what?” I hedged.
Silver’s smile was wicked. “Or else we spend the whole shift wondering out loud who put that smile on your face in front of all the customers.”
“You’re evil.”
“We’re evil. But we can be bought,” Fi reminded me.
“Your parents walked in on your one-night stand. Classic,” Silver said ten minutes later when I’d finished verbally vomiting all over them.
“And your vagina is officially ruined,” Fi added.
“And we aren’t in a relationship. Unless you’re my parents or a caseworker weighing my stability as a guardian, in which case we’ve been swept away by an unexpected romance.”
“But you are having sex,” Silver confirmed.
“Temporarily,” I said with emphasis.
Silver raised a pierced eyebrow. Fi stopped gobbling down her brownie.
“Saying it out loud makes it sound stupid. Maybe we should finish getting ready to open?”
“Eh. I’m PMS-ing. I’d rather eat another brownie and talk about penis length and orgasm intensity,” Fi said.