I pumped my legs and clawed at the air as I tried desperately to run to her, but I couldn抰 move. The entire landscape shifted. The sky became the ground and then all of it faded away. The last thing I saw before it went dark was Mom turning and walking away.
When I regained my focus I was back at the lighthouse, staring into the light, Hermes抯 hand on my shoulder.
揥here was she??I asked through a torrent of tears. 揥hat was that place??
揑 could not see it.?He sounded troubled by that. 揑t may be a place meant to be hidden from prying eyes. You said Hecate gave you a full cycle of the moon to retrieve your mother??
I nodded.
Hermes sighed. 揚erhaps that抯 all she could offer. Even in her power she cannot hide a mortal soul from the one god who has dominion over the underworld for very long.?
揂nd that would be who??
揌ades,?Hermes said with a deep, mournful sigh. 揃e thankful you haven抰 run afoul of him. Pray you never do. He is the worst of my father抯 brothers, and time has managed to make a monster of him.?
I could only picture cartoon images of the god of the underworld. Hermes seemed to be implying that Hades was still around, that he still existed, and worse yet, was vying with Hecate for Mom抯 soul.
揧our companions are waiting,?Hermes said. 揧ou should rejoin them and rest.?
I turned and went downstairs as Hermes retook his spot at the window.
揈verything okay??Circe asked as I fell into the bed next to her.
揘o.?
She fished around in her bag and pulled out a pack of tissues and handed it to me.
She fluffed the pillows under her head as I wiped my face.
揕ook at us,?Circe said. 揥e抮e laid up in Hermes抯 bed like it抯 no big deal. Even with everything I抳e seen, everything I know to be true, I never would have imagined this.?
揟here are about a thousand things I never could have imagined, and they抳e all happened to me in, like, two months.?I sighed and lay back, staring up into the latticework of crossbeams over my head.
揧ou抳e been through a lot,?she said, giving me a little half smile. 揟oo much, if we抮e being honest.?
I rolled up onto my elbow. 揅an I ask you something??
She nodded.
揂ll that stuff you and Marie and Persephone were talking about, the what-ifs梱ou really don抰 think we抣l get out of this in one piece, do you??
She hesitated. 揑 don抰 want to scare you but, no. I don抰。 But I know we have to go. Not just for your mom, even though I抎 still do it if that was the only goal, but also because maybe if we bring the pieces together, we can be rid of them.?She settled into the blankets and sighed. 揑 used to feel selfish for wanting that. I was raised knowing the Heart was my responsibility, but over the years it抯 become such a heavy burden that I don抰 feel selfish for wanting to set that burden down. Look at what it has cost us. The Heart doesn抰 define who we are or what we抮e capable of. Without it, we still have our gifts and we still have each other. That抯 enough for me.?
揗e too,?I said.
Circe may not have had confidence that we would get through this, but I decided that I was going to do whatever I needed to do to keep us whole.
CHAPTER 16
When I awoke the next morning it took me a minute to remember where I was. The smell of coffee and the sound of hushed voices brought everything back. Circe and Marie sat at the table.
揗orning,?Circe said.
Marie glanced at me, and I was struck by how sad she looked. Her eyes were red, like she抎 been crying. I quickly got up and joined them at the table.
揥hat抯 wrong??I asked, pulling a chair up next to her.
揘othing,?Marie said.
揇oesn抰 look like nothing,?I said, closing my hand over hers. 揥ere you crying??
She straightened up. 揑 don抰 know if you noticed, but Hermes is a dick.?
揙h,?I said. 揧eah. What happened? He said something that upset you??
揔eep in mind,?Circe said. 揌e was right when he told us the gods are disconnected from regular people. Who knows how long he抯 been out here by himself, and I just think he hasn抰 had anyone actually speak to him in any meaningful way in a long time. He抯 ?abrasive.?
Marie huffed.
I pushed my chair back. 揥here is he??
Marie looked me over, and the sadness was washed away by her wide smile. 揧ou gonna cuss out an actual god over me??
揧eah,?I said.
揑抦 flattered,?Marie said. 揃ut I don抰 think you need to worry. He抯 getting us a boat. We抣l be out of here soon, and hopefully I抣l never have to see him or his ugly little sandals ever again.?
I抎 let it go until I saw him, then I抎 probably cuss him out anyway. I pictured him slicing me up with that gold sword he had on him the night before and shuddered. Even still, seeing Marie upset bothered me.