I bite my bottom lip as tears start to form in my eyes. “Yes, there are three humans in this room right now.”
“Holy . . . shit.” Blakely collapses on my couch. “Who the hell is the father?” The minute the question falls past her lips, she shoots up to her feet again, eyes wide. “Jesus Christ, is it Hornsby?”
You know those tears that were welling up? Yeah, they’re now cascading down my cheeks in droves as I nod.
“Oh my God, are you sure?”
“He’s the only guy I’ve had sex with in the past year. So yeah, I’m pretty sure.” I wave my hand in front of my face as I start to hyperventilate. “What am I going to do? I’m freaking pregnant.”
“With Hornsby’s baby!” Blakely begins pacing. “You know, Pacey is going to murder him. Absolutely destroy him into nothing. Like I hope Hornsby had fun playing hockey because his life is about to end.”
“What? No.” I shake my head. “Pacey is not going to find out about this.”
Blakely pauses. “Oh.” Her shoulders straighten as a thought crosses her mind. “Well, I mean, that’s your choice. It’s your body.”
“What?” I ask. “No, I’m not . . . I’m not going to do that. I don’t think I could.”
Blakely looks confused as ever. “Then, uh, how do you expect Pacey not to find out?”
“I thought about that while you were driving over here. And the only thing I could come up with is that I start eating a lot around him. So much food that he possibly grows concerned. Whenever he’s around, there’s a burger in my mouth or ice cream, even an entire pizza. So when I start gaining weight, he’ll just think it’s because of this new eating habit I have.”
Blakely taps her chin and nods. “Novel idea, absolutely brilliant.” She holds her finger up. “One problem, though. After nine months of eating yourself into oblivion, you’re going to have a baby. Dare I ask how you plan on explaining that?”
“Uh . . . random stranger dropped the baby off at my apartment door because she thought the flower wreath I hang year round is inviting, so they thought I’d do a good job raising a baby?”
She takes a deep breath. “I understand that you’re pregnant, and that does weird things to your body and mind, but that suggestion is delusional. Pacey had a head injury, but it didn’t knock the common sense out of him.”
“Are you sure?” I wince.
“Positive,” Blakely declares as we both go back to pacing my apartment. “Ooo.” She stops. “Why don’t we bring in Winnie? She could possibly help figure out a way to tell Pacey. She seems smart and has a good hold on your brother. She could be very helpful.”
“True, but if I bring her in, I’d definitely have to tell Pacey because I wouldn’t want her to have to keep a secret like that from him.”
Blakely levels with me. “News flash, Penny. You’re going to have to tell him no matter what. You realize that, right?”
“But do I?” I ask. “I mean, let’s really give this some good thought. I could totally pull off the eating thing. Maybe slip in that I started a new foodie TikTok account. That’s believable. And then when it comes to the baby, well, I obviously wouldn’t bring it into work, so he would never see the child then, and it’s not like he comes over to my place a lot. If he does, I’ll just give you the baby. You know, the more I think about this, the more I realize that we can truly pull this off.”
“Hold on a second.” Blakely poses her hand to stop me. “You’re my best friend, and I love you dearly, and you know that no matter what happens, I’ll always be there for you, but”—she taps her crotch—“it’s all vagina down here, no penis. And last I remember, I wasn’t the one who got you pregnant. So when you say we, you can’t possibly be including me in on that we.”
“Uh, yeah,” I say as if she’s lost her mind. “This, you and me.” I motion between us. “This is a package deal. What I go through, you go through. You accepted those terms when you decided to be my best friend.”
“I don’t remember signing any contract.”
I prop my hands on my hips in irritation. “It’s a silent contract. Best friends are BOGOs. Buy one, get one. That’s us. So my pregnancy is your pregnancy.”
“Yeah, you keep saying that, and every time, it makes me want to take a step farther and farther away from you.” She pushes her hair behind her ear. “I’m too young to be thinking about babies and all of that. Perry and I are still just having fun.”