I’m terrified of how far he’ll push us.
I try to bottle this fear, smothering it so low that I can’t feel an ounce of it. I didn’t come here to plead for my father’s help. I don’t want him involved. I just needed to hear someone agree with me.
“Hey,” he says forcefully.
I turn my head to meet his hard gaze.
“Don’t let any motherfucker come into your life and destroy what belongs to you. Not your women, not your home, not your money or your career. You protect all of that, you hear me?” He sets a firm hand on my shoulder. He may offer backwards advice for me, but he’s always been there.
That’s more than any mother of mine can say.
“I only have one woman,”
I tell him with the raise of my brows.
“Don’t be a smartass.”
I digest all of his words, even if I shouldn’t. “I never wanted to attack someone again.” But I know I’m going to have to. I admit this to him, of all people. Not Connor, not Ryke or Lily.
“If you don’t want to ruin the reality show, like you told me, then you’ve got to do something to him.
He’ll bulldoze you, son. And if you won’t stick your fucking neck out, I will. I don’t want him near Lily.
She’s like a daughter to me.” He takes a large gulp of his coffee.
It’s like there’s a war inside my body with no signs of surrender. I attack Scott, I feel like shit. I do nothing, I feel like shit.
What the fuck is left for me?
“Don’t help me,” I suddenly say to my dad. “I need to do this on my own.”
He nods. “Just make sure you fucking hit him where it hurts most.”
I don’t even know where that is.
The worst part about being the underdog: I never win until the last minute. So I dig and claw and scrape, struggling in hope that in the final act, I’ll rise above.
But what happens if I never do?
{ 23 }
0 years : 07 months
March
LILY CALLOWAY
The middle of the afternoon in the middle of the week has to be the most depressing time. Stuck directly in the center where no one wants it. Lonely. When the house has emptied. People at work. People at lunch. No one here. Not with me at least.
I’m A. L. O. N. E.
Even the cameramen have all but scattered.
Right now would be the moment I’d beat myself up over procrastinating on schoolwork. But I finished my online assignments two hours ago.
Go me.
I thought I’d feel more accomplished, but celebrating by myself isn’t nearly as fun as doing other things by myself. Things I’m no longer allowed to do.
Carefully, I crawl onto the bed with the latest edition of Uncanny X-Men. It’s not my comic, and Lo has a strict “don’t read my comics before me” rule. Something about me creasing the pages or smudging the pictures. But boredom calls for risks, and I’m willing to risk his anger for Cyclops.
Five panels. That’s how long I make it before my mind drifts. I picture Lo. His abs. His dimpled smile and sharp jawline. I have to stop myself before my imagination leads to more nefarious places, ones with nudity and gyrating bodies.
My bedroom door opens just as I look back at the comic. Lo stands in the doorway like an apparition from my mind. Maybe he is.
I pinch myself.
Ouch…
Lo gives me a look. “I’m real, Lil.” He closes the door behind him and sets his leather briefcase on the desk. A gift from his father. It’s hard to pull my eyes from it. A year ago, that briefcase didn’t belong in our picture. Now it has a specific spot it rests.
It doesn’t feel out of place. Not like I once thought it would.
When I return my gaze to Lo, I realize he hasn’t moved. He carefully watches me the way one would a lightning storm. With curiosity, concern, and rapt attention.
“If you’re real,” I say, narrowing my eyes. “Then why aren’t you at work?”
“That’s the funny thing about working for yourself,” he says with a wry smile. “I can set my own hours, take my work home, and spend the afternoon making love to a girl.”
Oh…
Middle of the days and middle of the weeks don’t seem so lonely anymore. He doesn’t move closer and my breathing has already betrayed me. At least my body isn’t doing anything spastic…yet.
“Just a girl?” I ask. “Not a specific one?”
His eyes flit from my head slowly down the length of my body. I become so wet in response. Damn him.
He licks his lip and I have to grip the sheets not to jump off the bed and rush him. I’m so not used to horny Loren Hale coming to seduce me. I’m always the overly aroused, emotionally corrupt one. It’s a nice change, even if my body is screaming to go go go.