Without warning, she sucked his tongue between her lips, one pull, two, before she began to kiss him in earnest. Jasper抯 answering moan was so loud he wondered if anyone could hear it above the music next door. His cock. His goddamn cock sagged under the rush of hot need, then hoisted like a rising anchor inside his pants. Rita had to feel it, because she whimpered into his mouth, her hands growing more insistent on the waistband of his pants. There was none of her usual hesitancy in the kiss. He could all but feel Rita trying to distract herself from whatever ghosts the kitchen had stirred back to life. 揜ita, beautiful卨et抯 stop and catch our breath here棓
揚lease,?she breathed, golden-brown eyes focused on his mouth as if it were her last meal. 揇on抰 you need me back??
揧es,?he gritted. 揟hat抯 why I抦 trying to take it slow.?
揙h匤esus. I can抰 take the riddles anymore. I抦 not as experienced at playing厀hatever game this is.?When Rita slid out from under him, walking in a stilted manner toward the exit while smoothing her haywire hair, Jasper pounded his fists on the metal rack. Fuck, he wanted to give in. Wanted to drag her back out into the dining room and create his first lasting memory there. One neither of them would forget for the rest of their lives. If she hadn抰 shut down on him right before they抎 kissed梚f he hadn抰 felt right on the verge of knowing her, really knowing her tonight梞aybe it would have been their time. Their right time.
But he would be selling them short. I can push for more. I will create time for more, somehow, some way. Whatever it takes.
揥ait up. I抣l walk you back.?
She disappeared around the kitchen wall, boots sounding on the dining room floor toward the restaurant抯 front. 揟hat抯 really not necessary,?she called.
Hell. That was definitely hurt in her tone. 揜ita,?he grated, jogging after her. Thankfully, he caught her just before she swung the entrance door open, yanking her back against him. 揇on抰 leave like this. You might as well drive a stake through my chest, walking out of here with that wobble in your voice.?
Her sharp laugh was devoid of humor. 揥hat is this about for you? What do you want from me??
Everything. This acquaintance with Rita was no longer some test of his worth. It was something bigger. He could feel it. 揟ime. I need more time with you, Rita.?
揟here is no time. There was never going to be any time.?She tried to jerk away, but Jasper held tight until she settled with a heaved-out breath. 揋od, I know it抯 a double standard, but卛t抯 kind of shitty, as a woman, to be turned down for sex like that. Are you playing a game with me??
揘o,?he groaned into her shoulder, feeling as though his insides were being blowtorched. 揋od, no, beautiful. I wouldn抰 do that. You can feel how much I want to be inside you, right??
揟hus confusing me more.?
揙kay.?Maybe in order for more time to be a possibility梖or her to even want more time with him桱asper needed to leap first. Could he do that without pushing Rita away? Making himself a laughingstock in her eyes, too? 揥ould you listen for a few minutes??
There must have been gravity behind his question, because Rita抯 tension ebbed as she turned in his arms. She sidestepped him and nodded once, falling into one of the dining room chairs. He immediately memorized which one.
It took Jasper a few beats to collect his thoughts, being that he抎 never spoken of the incident out loud. Now that it had come time to share with another person, sourness ran rampant in his stomach. 揙ne night, a couple years back, I was on a bender. Nothing new for me桰 was probably on a bender more often than I was off one.?He glanced at the wall separating the eatery from the Liquor Hole. 揂nyway, I fell asleep in my office. Woke up the next evening and headed out to the bar for a glass of water, but the space had been booked. Women were taking up most of the bar with these giant sub sandwiches and Norah Jones music. Back then, I didn抰 schedule events of that sort. Really, I just let the place run itself, so I figured one of the bartenders booked a party.?
He checked to make sure Rita was still with him, found her listening with cautious interest. 揑t was a wedding shower, turned out. And they were卼alking about me.?He cleared the rust from his throat. 揅omparing notes. Laughing about me always being available for a quick visit. But梐nd I quote梚t was obvious from my shit-hole of a bar that I wasn抰 good for much else.?
揓asper厰
揟he bride-to-be asked if I was going to be the paid entertainment.?Relating the story didn抰 even hurt anymore. More than anything, it was the icy-cold shock he remembered. He抎 never been in a serious relationship with any of the women with whom he抎 made time, but the revelation that they all thought of him as nothing more than a punch line had forced him to look back. To remember those blurry encounters and how he抎 always woken up alone. Or how the experiences had always been hurried. Hurry, before someone finds us. Faster, I have an appointment.
揑 stopped getting drunk after that. Kind of stepped back.?Jasper ran a hand down his face. 揗y customers梙ell, my own employees梒ouldn抰 have a serious conversation with me. I抎 just become their good time. But they sure as shit didn抰 respect me.?He focused on Rita a moment, thinking of the women approaching him on the dance floor. 揧ou saw it last night. And that was an improvement.?
Rita stood, running her palms down the sides of her skirt. She closed the distance to him halfway and stopped, appearing to weigh her words carefully. God, she was beautiful in the partial light, surrounded by his restaurant, shifting on the creaky floorboards. If he wasn抰 a semirational man, he might have tied her to the waitress station and forbade her ever to leave.
揈veryone does things they regret. Believe me, I know. You should Google me sometime.?She blew out a breath. 揟hose women should regret not getting to know you. And you will get respect with this place. I know you will.?A sad smile passed over her lips. 揧ou had mine before you even unlocked the door.?
Instead of a sense of completion at having earned Rita抯 admiration, a hole in his stomach yawned wide. 揥hy do I hear a 慴ut?in there??
揃ecause we抮e at an impasse, Jasper. I抦 leaving tomorrow.?She shuffled backward a step and that one, simple movement almost sank him. 揑 understand that you need more from a woman now棓
揥rong. Wrong, Rita. Just you.?
揑 can抰 offer what I can抰 give.?She glanced toward the door. 揟his road trip is important to me and my family. I think maybe there抯 something at the end of it for us. My mother never did anything without a reason梩hat抯 why we had to respect the wish. Time is something I can抰 offer. There抯卻chool and finding a new job. A noncooking job. I抦 running from a restaurant and you抮e opening one.?She blinked as if everything had come into startling focus. 揝o I think, maybe棓
揇on抰 say it,?Jasper husked.
揟his is good-bye.?
Rita抯 smile was sad as she turned for the exit?
But she was brought up short when a crash sounded in the adjacent bar, accompanied by shouts. Raised voices Jasper didn抰 recognize, but apparently Rita did, because she wasted no time sprinting for the Liquor Hole, Jasper right on her heels.
Chapter Nineteen
Rita抯 heart banged around in her chest like sneakers inside a washing machine. That was Belmont抯 pissed-off voice she抎 heard, followed by Aaron抯。 Christ on a cracker. If pent-up sexual frustration, followed by a hefty swing into regret and sadness梒ourtesy of Jasper Ellis梔idn抰 kill her, the shock of seeing her brothers brawling in the Liquor Hole just might.