In addition to the survivors, the guest list included family members who had lost loved ones to the same trauma the other guests had survived. The families of the victims of that plane crash that killed all but one of the passengers. The parents of the drunken teenager who had died during the auto accident that sent the man’s burning car over the cliff. The sister of the man who did not make it out of the wilderness with his hiking partner. The truck driver whose cab had been the backstop for the sliding motorcycle. Walt returned to New York each year to see one family member in particular.
This far removed from his former occupation in the FBI, Walt owned just one suit. Formal attire was not required for his new life in Jamaica, and he had trashed every sport coat and tie he owned before he made the move years earlier. Now he pulled the lapels down tightly on his shoulders, straightened his tie, and took a deep breath before he pulled open the heavy doors of the Ascent Lounge. He made a beeline for the bar.
“What kind of rum do you have?” he asked the bartender.
The young man slid a menu across the bar. Walt ran his finger down the surprisingly large selection of rum and chose a Mount Gay 1703. The bartender poured it on the rocks and served it in a bottom-heavy tumbler, which felt perfectly balanced in his hand when Walt lifted it to his lips. His pension was not fat enough to afford Mount Gay, and ordering rum he couldn’t afford always stirred anxiety in his gut. Until he took the first sip. With drink in hand he leaned against the rail of the bar and surveyed the room. It was still early. The presentations and speeches had not yet started. He wanted a drink or two in him before he came face to face with her. As he swallowed his second sip of rum, he felt a light hand on his shoulder.
“Walt,” a woman said.
Walt knew the voice immediately. Dr. Eleanor Marshfield was the trauma surgeon who had sewn him back up. He turned with a smile.
“No surprise that I found you at the bar,” Dr. Marshfield said.
Walt offered a pained look on his face, then held up his rum. “Guilty as charged. Can I buy you one?”
“No, thank you. I’m on call.”
Walt nodded. The woman spent her life waiting for tragedies—car accidents and gunshot wounds. It was a hell of a way to live, but Walt was glad for her calling. She had saved his life.
“How have you been, Walt?”
“Good.” Walt bobbled his head up and down. “Pretty good.”
“How’s work?”
“I’m . . . not working anymore.”
Dr. Marshfield raised her eyebrows and wrinkled her forehead. “I thought that was only a temporary thing.”
Walt smiled. “Me too. But I guess there’s an unwritten rule in the FBI that after an agent takes two bullets through the heart, his services are no longer required.”
“It was just one through the heart. The other was through your neck. I’m good, but I’m not that good.”
“Thanks for the correction.”
“What’s been occupying your free time as a retired man?”
Rum, surf, guilt, and regret.
“I haven’t quite figured out the retirement thing yet,” he finally said. “But I’m working on it.”
“You’re young. You’ve got your whole life in front of you.”
Walt didn’t bother mentioning that that was exactly what he was worried about.
Dr. Marshfield’s phone buzzed and she looked at the screen. “I was hoping to stay longer. I’ve only spoken to a few of my past patients, but I’ve got to run over to the hospital. It was great seeing you, Walt. I’m glad you’re doing well.”
“Thanks, Doc. I’m glad you found me.”
She smiled. “See you next year?”
“If I’m still alive.”
“You will be. Just don’t run into any more bullets. And maybe take it easy on the alcohol.”
He watched her leave and took a sip of rum before he returned to scanning the crowd. He spent thirty minutes looking for her, his eyes fooling him a number of times—thinking he’d spotted her only to be disappointed when the woman turned, allowing Walt to see the face of a stranger. He ordered another rum.
“Walt. Freakin’。 Jenkins!”
Walt looked to his left. The face that materialized was from his distant past. Scott Sherwood was his former staff chief when he was working for the New York State Bureau of Criminal Investigation back in the nineties.
“Scott?” Walt shook his head and smiled. “What the hell are you doing here?”
“I came with a friend. She said she needed moral support, but since the moment we walked through the door she’s been talking with the doctors and nurses who helped her. I was about to take off when I thought I recognized my old friend at the bar. Damn! How long has it been?”
“I don’t know. Twenty years?”
“Has it been that long?” Scott shook his head. “Where does it go?”
“You tell me.”
“What have you been doing for the last few years? I ask around about my old friend Walt Jenkins, but nobody knows a thing?”
“Yeah, I’ve been out of the loop. I had to ditch New York to get myself straight. Never really found my way back.”
“You know I reached out a few times after you . . . you know. After you were shot.”
“I did know that, Scott, and thank you. I’m sorry I never got back to you. That was a weird time for me. Shit, I never got back to a lot of people. But I knew you had called. It meant a lot to me. I’m a shit for not letting you know.”
“No,” Scott said, waving him off. “I can only imagine what you were going through. I just wanted you to know that I heard about your situation and had you on my mind, that’s all. Everyone back at BCI was thinking about you.”
Walt pointed at the bar behind him. “Let me buy you a drink?”
Scott nodded. “Sure. Beefeater and tonic.”
Walt ordered from the bartender and handed Scott his drink.
“To old friends,” Scott said, taking his glass and tipping it toward Walt.
Walt smiled. “Old friends.”
“So what have you been up to? God knows I’ve asked enough people. Nobody knows what happened to you.”
Walt smiled. “Nothing exciting. I had to get out of town for a while, so I did.”
“Where’d you go?”
Walt paused before answering. “Uh, I actually headed to Jamaica. I thought it would be for a month or two. Turns out, I never came back.”
“Jamaica?”
Walt nodded. “Negril, on the West End.”
“I wouldn’t know Jamaica from Aruba. And what? You’re going to sit on a beach the rest of your life?”
“Not really sure. The Bureau gave me a nice pension, and I don’t have any definitive plans at the moment.”
“Sounds like life is good. I’m glad to see you doing well, Walt.”
Walt smiled and nodded again. Over Scott Sherwood’s shoulder and through the crowd, he finally spotted her. He hadn’t been looking, yet somehow his gaze was drawn to her. She was talking to someone, and laughing in a way that brought comfort to his heart. A heart that literally ached from time to time—mostly from the scar tissue that had formed, but sometimes, he was sure, because he missed her so much.