“I have to…”
“I mean it, Julianne. Don’t even think about—”
I hang up the phone before he can say anything else. I know he wants to try to talk me out of it, and he might be right. It might be stupid to go over there. But it’s my fault this is happening. I’ve got to do something.
I’ve got to go over there.
Chapter 54
APRIL
Courtney Burns.
You want the truth about Courtney Burns? Here’s the truth:
Bobby was two years old. He wouldn’t stop crying that day. While we were at the department store, he threw himself onto the ground and had an all-out tantrum, his legs and arms flailing around, his tiny face turning pink. I can’t even remember what the tantrum was about. Maybe because he wanted to wear his diaper as a hat and I wouldn’t let him. Maybe because I wouldn’t let him eat sunscreen. Who knows. But at the end of a very long day, I finally got him to bed. He passed out in his crib and I went to the kitchen to make some dinner before Elliot got home from work. It smelled wonderful.
But Elliot wasn’t interested in dinner. He got home from work and he said, “April, we need to talk.”
I didn’t look up from the meat sauce I was stirring on the stove. I didn’t want it to burn. “About what?”
“I…” I could feel Elliot’s presence behind me. “I’ve met someone else.”
I put down the spoon and turned to look at him. This was before he started shaving his head, and his hair was receding a lot, but he still looked very handsome. He still sometimes turned heads. “What?”
“I’m sorry.” He dropped his eyes. “It’s Courtney. My assistant at work. I… I didn’t mean for it to happen.”
Elliot was cheating on me. I was hurt, but not entirely surprised. Men cheated. That was just what they did. I would make him grovel, but ultimately, I would forgive him. “Is it over then?”
“April.” His brow furrowed. “I… I’m in love with her.”
And then I realized what he was saying to me. He wasn’t confessing an affair. He was telling me he was leaving me for her.
I saw my entire life falling apart. My son growing up without a father in the house. Scrounging around for money. I could never afford to live in this neighborhood as a single mother. Where would we live? What would I do?
All because of Courtney.
So I kept it from happening. Dr. Williams was so wonderful about that. Joe was my primary care doctor back then, and I always felt like he had a thing for me, even though he was happily married. He was able to look up the name of Courtney’s doctor and call in an Ativan prescription under his name. I picked up the prescription and I went to Courtney’s house. I got in through the back door, which was hanging right open. It wasn’t even locked!
And I waited for her.
Ultimately, what the police determined was true. Courtney did take all those pills herself. So technically, it was suicide. But she probably wouldn’t have taken them if I wasn’t holding that knife. I explained to her the way I would slice up her beautiful face first, then the rest of her if she didn’t do what I said. She was resistant at first, but when I cut off her pretty blond hair, she became much more compliant.
And Elliot stayed, of course. Although he never looked at me quite the same after that. But you can certainly understand why I never wanted to get pregnant again. He started up with her when I was still padded with about fifteen pounds of my baby weight from Bobby, when I was too tired for the kind of enthusiastic performance I’m sure Courtney put on in bed. Elliot claims he wants another baby, but look what he did to me after the first one we had. You can’t blame me for taking birth control pills.
My mother was my alibi for the night of Courtney’s death. I explained to her the way it would look. I swore to her I didn’t kill Courtney, but I needed an alibi. I needed her to help me. And she did it.
A year later, she changed her mind. She decided I probably did kill Courtney after all. Can you believe that? What kind of loyalty is that to her daughter? Yes, she was right. But still.
Luckily, Joe helped me again. He was her doctor too by then—I made sure of that—and it was almost too easy to label her with a diagnosis of early-onset dementia. I took her to court and became her health care proxy and power of attorney. Joe pulled some strings to get her into Shady Oaks, where he was able to give her enough medications to make sure nobody doubted the diagnosis.
He’s been great. But to be fair, I’ve made it worth his while.
That’s one of the tenets of life. Some people get pushed around, and some people do the pushing. I don’t let myself get pushed around. I’m successful. My husband is an attorney, although granted, he isn’t around as much as I’d like and his career has been in the toilet a bit lately. And I’ve got a successful YouTube show with tons of subscribers. And I have a beautiful and intelligent little boy, who has some minor anger management issues that everyone blows totally out of proportion.
If anyone tries to push me around, I make sure they’re sorry.
For example, Mrs. Kirkland.
She came to my house, ranting and raving about how she saw me and Mark together. How she was going to tell everybody in town. How I was a disgrace. She even called me a…
Well, I don’t like to use bad language. But she called me something that rhymed with “poor” and started with the letter W.
Can you imagine? We were neighbors for years. I mean, yes, I hated her. I did let Bobby trample her roses on purpose a few times. But that sort of language was uncalled for.
She was so old. I barely even pushed her down the stairs. It was more like a nudge.
I do what I have to do. Yes, I took money from the PTA account. But it wasn’t much. Is it my fault my husband has torpedoed his career because he can’t keep his junk in his pants? I can’t even buy the basic stuff I need for my show. I hardly took any money. Julie didn’t even notice last year.
Maria Cooper has also been trying to push me around. I can’t imagine why. I suppose she may know my secret about Courtney. But why would she care? Maybe she’s jealous because she sees the way her husband looks at me. But that’s not my fault.
She should thank me. Because if I wanted Sean Cooper, I could have him. Easily. Men are so weak. If I gave him a serious invitation, he would be in my bed in an hour. She’s lucky I’ve kept my distance.
But I’m done being pushed around by Maria. Now she’s going to get what she deserves. The same way Courtney did. The same way my mother did. The same way Mrs. Kirkland did.
That’s why I brought the knife with me.
_____
I’ll make it look like a robbery. Somebody was burglarizing Maria’s home, and she came home unexpectedly in the middle of the day and surprised them. I’ll have to take a few things from the house to make it realistic. Some jewelry. Maybe her laptop. It’s not like the Coopers have anything worth stealing. Any logical burglar would go next-door to the Bresslers. That house has the motherlode. I’ve almost been tempted to burglarize them a few times.
I do feel sorry for Sean and Owen. This will be hard on them. Sean will probably be the one to find her. Lying in a pool of blood in the middle of their bedroom. I hope Owen will be spared that. Maybe I should pick him up from school today to make sure he isn’t around when the body is discovered.