“Thanks for running with Dom. He’s so fast, I can’t keep up.”
“Neither can I.” I managed a smile, preoccupied. Ethan had lost weight, a lot, and we hadn’t even been here a week.
“He’s hyperactive. He’s gotta run to burn it off.”
“Right.” I knew Wiki was trying to make conversation, but I was thinking about Ethan. He was missing meals, since our mealtimes were all over the lot.
“He said you grew up in Hershey. We used to go there on field trips, too. It’s pretty there.”
“Yes.” I was trying to remember what I’d seen Ethan eat in the past few days. Sometimes he ate with Lucinda, and there was snacking. The breakdown in our routine made it hard to tell.
“I loved that ride through the factory, even though it was fake. The smell was great. The gift shop was the big thing. I ate so many Reese’s Pieces I threw up on the bus home.”
“Yikes.” I only half-listened.
“He told me you were at Gitmo, too. That must’ve been cool. Dom said you had to be the ‘best of the best’ to be chosen. What did you do there? Were you in court?”
“The 806 hearings? No.” I watched Ethan, wondering if Lucinda had noticed how thin he had gotten.
“What’s that mean, 806?”
“It’s what they called the detainee hearings. The court reporters weren’t in the proceedings.” I flashed on the hearings, which were about alleged abuses that took place during detainee interrogations, in the wake of 9/11. The litigation took so long, most of the pretrial proceedings were ongoing, even today.
“Where did you work, if you weren’t in the courtroom?”
“We had our own housing unit. They gave us the audio recordings, and we made a same-day transcript.”
“You know what I don’t get? Why do they need a court stenographer, if they have audiotape? Like, can’t they use dictation software?”
I got this question so often I could answer on autopilot. “Audio can’t distinguish when different speakers interrupt each other or cross talk, and at Gitmo, there were accents to deal with.”
“The beaches must’ve been nice.”
“We didn’t get much R & R, but Glass Beach was.” I noticed Ethan running across the lawn, and his legs looked positively spindly. “I didn’t swim. They got brown sharks.”
Wiki snorted. “How about boating? My dad has a boat we take down the Chesapeake.”
“Only once. We cruised the river until we got to the sign that says if you go farther, they shoot you.”
Wiki laughed, and I seized the moment to go.
“You know, I should get Ethan inside.”
“Right.” Wiki held out the fossil. “He can have this.”
“Thanks.” I smiled, touched. Wiki didn’t have Dom’s ease with people, but I liked him, too. “It’s nice of you to give it up.”
“Not a problem. I still have my collection from fifth grade.”
I laughed, but I wasn’t sure he was kidding.
Chapter Twenty-Two
I set the fossil on the table just as Lucinda came into the kitchen in a white T-shirt and shorts, her hair wrapped in a towel. Her eyes looked puffy, so I knew she had been crying in the shower. I stepped toward her and kissed her on the cheek. “Hey, babe.”
“Hi.” Lucinda met my eye in a tacit thank-you, then sat down. “What’s that, a shell?”
“No, a fossil Wiki found.”
“He gave it to me.” Ethan picked it up, examining it.
“Nice, right?” I ruffled the top of his head. “Buddy, why don’t you go take a shower, too?”
“Okay.” Ethan left the room with Moonie trotting after him, and I sat down across from Lucinda, patting her hand across the table.
“Want coffee or anything?”
“No, thanks.”
“Are you hungry?”
“Not really.”
“You haven’t eaten since morning, right?”
“Guess not.” Lucinda shrugged.
“What about Ethan? Did he have breakfast with you?”
“No, he was in his room.”
“I made him pancakes and he barely ate.” I had just cleared the dirty plate. “I don’t know if he ate the whole day. Do you?”
Lucinda blinked. “If he’s hungry, he’ll eat.”
“Look, I think we’re losing structure. So from now on, after my run, I’ll wake you guys up and you come downstairs. I’ll make breakfast for everybody.” I squeezed her hand. “Then maybe at twelve-thirty or so, I’ll make lunch. We can make dinner together at six, or I’ll do it, I don’t mind.”
“Okay, but why?” Lucinda took the towel off her head and finger-combed her damp curls.
“I want us to eat together. Get Ethan back to a routine. At home, we ate together when we could.”
Lucinda eyed me, pained. “Can’t we take it easy on him? Does he have to do chores?”
I remembered Allison used to tease me about that, too.
Dad, let me sleep in. There’s nothing to milk here.
“It’s not that, honey. He’s spending all day in his room, it’s not healthy. He looks pale. He doesn’t go out. We live across from a beach, and he hasn’t even seen it.” I caught myself when Lucinda cringed, realizing she hadn’t, either. “As a pattern, I don’t think it’s good, and he looks thin to me.”
Lucinda frowned in thought. “You know, now that you mention it, I touched his back this morning and it felt spiny.”
“Right. We have to get a scale.”
“There’s one in the bathroom. I lost three pounds. My shorts fit great.” Lucinda half-smiled, but it faded. “Jason, what? You’re worried about his weight, for real?”
“I’m worried about our structure. I know how to fix it. I need you to work with me.”
Lucinda’s eyes flared with alarm. “I remember he didn’t eat the pizza. I thought it was because it was Allison’s turn.”
I could see her mind racing. “Don’t worry—”
“Oh no, I think you’re right!” Lucinda straightened in the chair. “Boys can get eating disorders, too. These are just the conditions that can cause it. I mean, look at what he’s gone through, he’ll want to exert control in some way. It’s about control, not food. We have to get on top of this.”
I was beginning to regret bringing it up. “Okay, but—”
“He told me he still feels like it’s his fault because he let Moonie go.” Lucinda’s forehead knit. “We need to get him into therapy.”
“We will, and in the meantime, we’ll make sure he eats. We can get him on a scale—”
“No. That makes it a thing. You’re not supposed to make weight a thing.” Lucinda rubbed her face. “I’ve been enabling this, I think. We hang in his room and talk about Allison. I thought if he got his feelings out and rested, he’d feel better.”
“He would, and you didn’t cause this.”
“But I’m enabling it. I am enabling it. It’s just that it’s hard.”
“I know, honey, I really do.” I watched her face fall, then went and put my arm around her. Her wet hair felt cool. “Don’t worry, we’re going to get through this.”