The constant feeling of being out of control rose to the surface once again. “I don’t know how to do this, Carmen. Not this time. I’m already drowning, and I’ve only been here a month.”
“I’m booking a ticket.”
Brooke looked at her best friend, a single tear rolled down her cheek. “I need you.”
Carmen sat by Brooke’s side during the consultation with the nursing home director.
She’d arrived the night before and they drank too much wine, laughed . . . cried, and ate entirely too many carbs.
“Your father’s level of care is rather intense at this time. The wound nurse expects his need for care to be a minimum of two months. The antibiotics he’s on will last for the next three weeks and at that time we will reevaluate for his discharge home.”
“Wait, I thought his wound care needs were for two to three months.”
The director, Kyle, was an older man, salt-and-pepper hair, and looked as if he needed to put on a few pounds to be truly healthy. Brooke felt as if he was annoyed she’d requested an in-person meeting.
“A home health nurse can be requested after he is off the IV antibiotics.”
Carmen sat forward. “I understand Mr. Turner is incontinent and confused.”
Kyle looked at his notes. “Ah, yes. But he’d had a stroke.”
“Which he recovered from enough to not have issues with incontinence. He was independent before this last illness. He had some right-sided weakness, but he managed.” Brooke looked between Kyle and Carmen as she spoke.
“Oh, well. Right. He lives with you?”
“No . . . Yes, kind of.” Brooke looked at Carmen. “I’m here to get him back on his feet like I did after the stroke.”
Kyle nodded a few times, then shook his head. “It’s too soon to say how well he’ll progress, but in my experience, in cases like your father’s . . . as the medical problems stack up, the independence diminishes. I wouldn’t expect your father to be what he was before this episode.”
Brooke blinked several times. “The doctors said—”
“Doctors tell you that wounds heal, and conditions improve. Here, we see patients lose their ability to feed themselves or use the bathroom . . . take their medications on time. The routine of normal life is completely oppressed by admission into our facility, and the desire to improve sometimes dissolves as well. I’m not saying that is your father, but I am suggesting that you prepare yourself for what his long-term care needs might be.”
“And what do you think those are?” Carmen asked.
Kyle looked back at the papers in his lap, flipped through the notes. “Your father lived alone?”
“Yes. Completely independent.”
“Did he drive?”
She sighed. “Yes.”
Kyle looked up at her. “You don’t think he should have.”
“No.”
“How was the condition of his home?”
Brooke opened her mouth, thought of the mess she’d walked into.
“Has your father made any extravagant purchases lately? Anything out of the ordinary?”
Carmen reached over and took Brooke’s hand.
Kyle stopped asking questions and rested his hands in his lap. “Bowel obstructions can happen to anyone, but elderly people who aren’t eating a balanced diet or getting enough exercise are more likely to have issues. Your father’s independence may not be something he can return to.” Kyle tilted his head. “It’s not my place to tell people what they should or shouldn’t do when it comes to their family members, but I can tell you after a lifetime of taking care of the elderly, caring for them is a full-time twenty-four-seven job with no weekends or nights off. It’s too soon to say if your father will get control of his bodily functions. If he doesn’t, you’ll need to—”
“I get it!” she cut him off.
“Either way, you might ask yourself if your dad should return to living on his own. Once the antibiotics are no longer needed and home health can be requested and you’re willing to change diapers and give baths, he can be discharged home.”
Brooke squeezed her eyes closed.
“And if that isn’t an option?” Carmen asked.
“Assisted living, once his wound heals. If he or you have the funds for that. Does he own his home?”
“No,” Brooke said. “He has a little money and social security.”
Kyle started to straighten the papers in his lap. “Medicare pays for a minimal number of days in a nursing home if a doctor warrants a need. You can appeal for more if the doctor wants to discharge before the allotted time, of course, and should . . . but you should know that it is likely that you’ll be denied.”
“What does that mean?” Brooke’s head was spinning. All the information Kyle was pushing in was too much.
“When Medicare stops paying the bill, your father will be responsible.”
“And how much is that?”
“Our rate is $430 a day.”
“What the—” Carmen came halfway out of her chair.
Kyle lifted a hand. “We’re not there yet, but I want you to understand what you’re facing. Best case, your father regains all his faculties, is able to ambulate, use the bathroom, bathe, and not do anything destructive in the coming days and he can go home with the occasional home health nurse helping with his wound care until it heals.”
Yeah . . . Brooke thought of the shell of a man in the bed upstairs right now and couldn’t imagine that happening. Even if it did . . . the state of his home, his decision-making . . .
“More likely, your father will need more time. His activities of daily living need assistance. Diapers, bathing, dressing . . . These things can be taken care of in assisted living, but they won’t accept him until the wound from surgery is completely healed. So, you’re looking at a decent-size bill from us. We’ll plead with the doctors to extend as long as we can, but still, I would expect a minimum bill of four weeks, expecting Medicare to stop paying after a month.”
Brooke did some mental math.
“If your father owned a home, you could sell it to take care of these expenses.”
Brooke looked at Carmen with a sigh. “My dad was married four times. It’s kinda hard to have much of anything when you’re constantly dividing your assets.”
Kyle chuckled. “There are a lot of assisted living facilities in the area.”
She closed her eyes again.
“However.”
“What else?” she asked, afraid of the answer.
“I suggest you move your dad closer to you. If you choose the assisted living route, you’ll still likely take him to his doctor’s appointments, get him his essentials, visit. Yes, the facilities can coordinate that stuff, but it’s easier on you if you’re close by. The more you can do on occasion, the less expensive those facilities will run. It’s hard to keep an eye on his care from far away. No reason to do that from Washington State.”
She thought of the boxes in the condo.
The condo she might need to sell just to foot the bill.
“Thank you. I had no idea.”
“No one really does until it happens,” Kyle said before standing.