“What’s wrong?” Finn murmurs. “Haven’t I spent the past month teaching you how to love yourself? Remember what I told you? It’s confidence, Avery.”
I raise my shoulders and drop them. “I appreciate it. And I feel great being with you. But you don’t erase a lifetime of insecurities and doubt in a few weeks. This isn’t part of the deal. You’re supposed to show me how to fuck, not how to love.”
I wish I could take it back. I want to swallow the words back down and shove them into the depths of my stomach. I don’t mean a damn word, but I’m scared to tell him how I feel. There is no good answer. Even if he returns my feelings, the clock will immediately start ticking. We make sense in the bubble. But what happens when we step out? Finn isn’t going to feel this way about me forever.
His eyelids droop as he presses his lips into a firm line. “Okay, I hear you.”
“I’m sorry.”
“It’s fine. But it’s clear what we’re doing isn’t working. I wanted to help you, not make you feel even more insecure. So…” The flicker of a playful smile teases the corner of his lip. “Until you’re ready to do this”—he juts his thumb over his shoulder—“we should probably stop our lessons.”
“What?” Oh no, buddy. No, no. One whole summer. I’ve got six more weeks at least of enjoying your body.
“You heard me.” Now he’s wearing a full-blown, shit-eating grin. “Come on, Queen. We’re going to be late.”
He leaves me behind as he moves toward the door. Like a child robbed of her candy, I can’t help but pout. My hands find my hips and my toes nervously twitch in my high heels. “You’re seriously trying to cut me off from sex? You really think that’ll get you your way?”
“Excuse me,” he mumbles with his eyes locked on mine. My gaze immediately falls to his crotch as he makes a meal out of adjusting himself through his pants, his thin slacks easily outlining the shape of his dick. Even unaroused, the man is Hulk-sized. “There we go. Much better.”
“Was that necessary?” I ask. I blink at him, unimpressed. “That’s playing dirty.”
“Don’t worry, sweetheart, it won’t take you long. You’ll be posing for me soon, and after, we’re going to christen this studio. I’m going to fuck you ten different ways in this room. I promise you that,” he says, following up with a light chuckle.
“I’m not getting in front of the camera, Finn.” Of all the stupid things I just said, that part remains to be true. I take his outstretched hand and weave my fingers in his.
“Oh, Avery,” Finn singsongs. “I know how I affect you, and I have every intention of playing dirty.”
24
Finn
I give the upscale restaurant a once-over, but there’s still no sign of Dad. We reconfirmed. Last week, I even texted him and asked him to update the reservation to accommodate three. So why he’s late, I don’t understand. I’m not particularly upset. I’m enjoying this pretentious restaurant, with my date. I’m not sure if Avery would call this an official date—but she’s wearing her sexy black dress, her makeup is done, and she’s even wearing golden hoops in her ears. I didn’t even realize Avery’s ears were pierced until tonight.
That has to be something. If she’s putting in this much effort to fix up like this to meet my dad, she must want to make a good impression. Because…she cares, right? She has to be feeling the way I’m feeling.
Our waitress, who politely introduced herself as Penny, returns to our table and smiles, and she silently refreshes our water glasses.
“Excuse me, Penny, could we start with an appetizer, please?” I ask and the waitress grimaces.
“I’m so sorry. Restaurant policy is we can’t put in food orders until the entire party has arrived. I can get you another round of drinks and more wasabi nuts, though.”
I glance at the tiny dish of almonds that Avery hasn’t touched. Avery isn’t a picky eater and I’ve learned in the past month that both in the kitchen and in the bedroom, she’s open to trying pretty much anything at least once, but wasabi is off the table. She nearly gagged when the waitress set them on the table.
“Would you like a drink, Queen?” I set my eyes on Avery and after a quick smile, I let my gaze wander down to her ample cleavage. Ah, damn. Holding out might be a little harder for me than I realized. But I don’t know how else to get her in my studio. I know she doesn’t want me to document her body, but it’s not for me. It’s for her. She needs this. I’ve seen it so many times before. It’s why I got into boudoir photography. The pride I get when a woman finds her confidence and finally sees herself as all the things she never thought she was…it’s unrivaled. I like giving that gift.
Penny turns her head and stares right at Avery. Her shoulders relax, and she changes her tone to a casual one. “Excuse me, girl. He calls you Queen?” she asks.
Avery covers her eyes as her smile spreads and her cheeks turn pink. “Every time he sees me. He treats me like one too.”
Penny whips her head around and glances at me. She clutches her chest. “How long have you two been together?”
“A little over a month,” I respond.
Avery raises her brows at me and I shoot her a little wink. She keeps her eyes on me as she grips her water glass and brings it to her lips. “It’s been a really good month,” she says before taking a small sip.
There. There it is. Validation. I knew she wanted more too. I felt it. But how? Should she stay in Vegas? Should I go to California? Long distance isn’t an option. I watched that travesty unfold with my parents. Maybe we’re not ready for this conversation yet. Maybe we’re just ready to own up to what this really is, no matter how it got started.
“You two,” Penny says, pointing back and forth between us on opposite sides of the booth, “are perfect together.” Her eyes land on Avery again. “Hold onto him tight, honey. When a man calls you a queen every day, hold on damn tight.” She clenches one of her fists in the air, showing off her red-manicured nails. “What can I get you to drink?”
Avery taps the long, skinny drink menu to her left. “I can’t decide between the Show Me Love or the Start Me Up. What’s your recommendation?”
“Um, let’s see. Show Me Love has a delicious lychee puree. It’s unique and fresh. You’ll never taste anything like it, but it’s light and a touch sour. Start Me Up is much sweeter and bolder. The passion fruit puree mixes perfectly with the pineapple rum. Both are fantastic choices.”
All right, time to flex a little. I know Avery isn’t after the finer things in life, but if she’s with me, she can have them.
I pull out my wallet and fish out a few hundred-dollar bills. “Bring her both. Johnnie Walker Blue for me.” I fold the bills between my ring and middle finger and hold them out to the waitress. “And please put in an order for the calamari and the brie-stuffed mushrooms.” I try to make sure my smile is kind but assertive. I don’t love acting like a Harvey, but fuck if I’ll let my girl go hungry because my dad can’t get his ass to a restaurant on time.