Perhaps I should be aroused. I thought I’d be fighting a hard-on this entire shoot, but Avery looks so nervous at the moment, all I feel is protective.
“Deep breath,” I instruct, but she doesn’t obey. In fact, it looks like she’s holding her breath. “Avery,” I say again. “Take a deep breath. It’s okay. It’s just me and this shouldn’t be news to you by now, but you look incredible. So sexy and powerful.”
“How long will this take? Ten minutes or so?”
I exhale. “I’m going to do something I normally would never offer a client, so you’ll have to pardon the lack of professionalism.”
Her eyes light up, no doubt thinking I’m going to omit the photos and throw her onto the bed. Incorrect. “Come here,” I say, pulling her against my chest. She’s so much shorter than me without heels, so I can easily rest my chin on her head. “Hey, shrimp, can you see over my shoulder?” I wrap my arms tighter around her, trailing the divot of her spine with my fingertips.
“I can,” she mumbles against my pec.
“What’s that sign say?”
She mutters something incomprehensible.
“One more time?” I ask.
“You’re beautiful,” she grumbles, fully agitated.
“And?”
“You’re worthy,” she says in a huff.
“And?”
She leans backward and tilts her chin up to find my eyes. “That’s all it says. You’re beautiful and you’re worthy.”
“And you’re mine,” I add. Hooking my finger under her chin the way I’ve done a dozen times by now, I rub my thumb across her cheek soothingly. “I take really good care of what’s mine, Avery. I promise you.”
It takes her a while to speak, and then finally she drops her arms and buries into me. Her head knocks against my chest. Her freed breasts press against the top of my abs. She wraps her arms around my neck and speaks into my shirt quietly, maybe hoping I can’t hear. But her words ring through clearly. “You…are…overwhelming, Finn. I never stood a chance.”
“I know,” I say. It’s how I intended it. From the moment I learned her name, I wanted to make Avery Scott fall for me. “Now, if you really are uncomfortable, I do actually have some brand-new lingerie you could wear.”
“You do?” She looks at me, her brows furrowing.
“I took your advice and called some of those boutiques to see if they would carry my business cards in exchange for showing off their collections for my clients. They donated a few sets and I asked for everything in your size.”
She narrows her eyes. “Being?”
“Hey, now. We don’t talk numbers in the studio. I just asked for everything in a size beautiful. Do you want to try it on?”
Peeling herself away from me and taking a giant step backward, Avery’s entire body is in plain view. Every soft bow and fleshy curve of her body has me mentally salivating, especially because now she looks more determined than I’ve ever seen her.
“No, I’m okay. Let’s do this.”
“Good girl,” I say and pump my brows.
Her jaw drops as she scoffs. “So much for keeping this professional.”
I chuckle as I spin her around and pat her bare ass. “Last one. I promise.” Grabbing my loaded camera from the table behind me, I continue in my most business-like tone. “Now, Ms. Scott, could you take a seat on the floor with your back against the footboard of the bed?”
She does as I ask and I resist the urge to call her my good girl once again.
“Bend your knees and arch your back a bit—there. Good, that’s perfect.”
I cross the space between us and adjust her long hair. Avery has the perfect hair and style for a boudoir shoot. I can strategically hide her nipples underneath her long locks. When I’m satisfied with her pose, I step back and allow myself to admire the view.
“All right,” I say, “you ready?”
She nods somewhat stoically, trying not to jostle her hair out of place.
“Okay, Queen, we’re going to dive right in. I’m only going to put you through one roll of film—I’ve only got thirty-six shots I can take, so we’re not going to waste any time on shyness.”
“Okay,” she answers.
I lower my voice. “Now spread your legs but completely cover your perfect little clit with your palm. Because if I see it, I’m going to have to stop what I’m doing and suck on it.”
Avery looks like she’s torn between scolding my audacity or succumbing to the sexy thought. Her lips slacken and her bottom lip parts from the top, just slightly, and even under the soft glow of the mood lighting, I can see her cheeks flush.
There it is. Perfect shot. That’s exactly the expression I wanted. Thirsty, nervous desire. And now it’s time to go to work.
Click. Click.
“Spread your legs a little wider. Hold that pose.” I boss her around absentmindedly as I take two steps to my right for a different angle.
Click. Click.
“That’s beautiful, Avery. Exactly what I want to see.”
Good girl.
We did not stop at one roll of film. He’s had to replace the camera film at least twice now. I was nervous for the first five minutes and then something powerful took over me.
It was Finn’s eyes and the way he was trying to control his smile as he looked through the lens. He’s been scolding me for the past half hour because I have a bad habit of looking right at the camera.
Stop that. Look over there, Avery.
Over my shoulder.
Don’t stare right at the lens, Queen.
I needed a lot of direction, but little did Finn know, I wasn’t staring at the camera. I was staring at his eyes. He looked so pleased. So damn pleased with me. He’s looking at me the way I imagine I look at him.
It isn’t selfish or unbecoming to be the star every now and then. It feels damn good to get dressed up and feel so sexy and so…womanly. I never understood that definition until today.
Woman. That word. It’s power, but it’s tenderness. It’s control, but compromise. A woman can be all things, to all people, which is why she has to be so careful about what she chooses.
I chose to step back.
I chose to be told how I should feel about myself.
I chose to love everyone else more than I loved myself.
And that’s why Finn wanted to do this because there’s magic in this studio. At first, I listened to his commands, adjusting myself as he saw fit. Then the tables turned and I started bossing him around. I wanted to try new poses and different angles. He photographed me with the stockings on and then off. I let the sexy black high heels he used as a prop dangle on my foot as I pretended to touch myself. I rolled around in a bed of black roses like my very essence was sin and lust. I’ve never known this energy. But now that I’ve found it, I am determined to keep it.
My ass and my breasts are bare all over that camera and I can’t wait to see what these pictures look like. I can’t wait to see the expression on my face because I imagine it’s complete. Satisfied. Finally…
Confident.
It’s true. I thought confidence would make me feel taller or more poised. I thought my voice would get a bit deeper and my chin would be permanently fixed in an upward tilt.