“Assholes.”
They scream. It takes everything in me not to join in the laughter because they’re too much. But I’m staying mad. I don’t care how hard they try to pull me out.
“I’m dying a slow death, and you’re doing Tay Tay puns. Really? You guys are the worst.”
They still don’t care, more laughter spilling out. Dammit. It’s happening…I’m buying in. I swear to god. It’s impossible to be angry when I’m surrounded by clowns.
“Fine, consider this my Dear John letter. Where my love for you once existed, there’s now only a blank space.”
Clapping. They’re fucking clapping.
My sister raises her eyebrows, doing a little shimmy as she veers in a totally different direction.
“Can we also acknowledge the elephant in the room?”
“Yeah,” Millie cuts in. “When am I getting picked up because I’m not staying at the house of horrors without you.”
“I’ll let you know as soon as I know where I live.”
My sister shakes her head.
“No, I meant that the guy is fucking hot.”
I scowl, kind of nodding but still rolling my eyes as Millie chuckles.
“Yeah, he totally is. And his personality is Eleanor’s kryptonite. Super cocky, flirts by giving her shit, and can’t keep his hands off her. At least last night, he couldn’t.”
I huff a tiny growl.
“Would you two read the room? Look where that got me. I’m living the dream, hitched to a guy who regrets me about as much as I regret him right now. My life is ruined. Focus.”
My sister and Millie laugh. Again. I might as well be a damn HBO comedy special with how much these two are belly-laughing it up. I’ll be here all night, folks, and twice on Sunday.
“Okay. Settle down,” my sister teases. “Inconvenienced, yes. Ruined? Take it down, Meryl. You can’t exist in hyperbole when you probably can’t even spell it.”
“Y-o-u-a-r-e-a-t-w-a-t. Am I close?”
“Shut up. You’ve basically been ordered to an extended vacay…with a hottie who’s paying. So, while I want to be sad for you…”
Is my sister right? A little. While the situation is very much fucked, I’m aware it’s not apocalyptic. But I am not at all ready to bright side or listen to reason.
Absolutely. Fucking. Not.
“Excuse me,” I snarl sarcastically. “Roll it back, Samantha. This is not the time for reason. We need revenge plans and shit talk. Get on board. Mills…you need to handle your bestie.”
Millie points to herself, chuckling.
“Oh, she’s mine now?”
“Yes, when she’s dumb, she belongs to you. That’s how it works when you’re raising children together.”
Samantha smiles back at me as I contemplate throwing my phone in the trash so I don’t have to witness this traitorous conversation anymore. Obviously, she knows I’m not really mad at her, but I am mad at Crew.
And I’m holding on to it. Letting it fester. Because grudges are like comfort blankets for haters. And I’m definitely his hater today.
“Listen to me,” I protest. “The next thirty days will be all-out war because he’s left me no choice other than to make him as miserable as I am right now. That’s the only silver lining I will acknowledge.”
As if beckoned, Crew starts walking toward me, his jaw tense as he pockets his phone. Shit. Did he hear me? Millie calls my name, but I don’t answer.
Crew’s eyes are locked on mine as he starts speaking.
“There’s paparazzi in the front. That asshole judge must’ve tipped them off. We’re being picked up in the back. Get off your call.”
“Um, noo. You can wait,” I spit back, staring up at him.
God, he’s too close, hovering, and for the life of me and despite how angry I am for being in this position…other parts of me, however, are getting too excited at being in this exact position. I’m the definition of I hate his face, but I’d still sit on it.
I take a step back, feeling heat rise up my neck.
“Just get off the fucking call.”
“When you get off your high horse.”
I look back at the screen at Sami and Millie and their eyebrows, slow matching smirks blooming on their faces.
Crew lets out a heavy breath before tossing his words back.
“That mouth is only cute when I want to shut it up with my—”
“Call us back!” they yell in unison, cutting him off, but I shake my head.
“Absolutely not.” My eyes lift back to his, and I dig my heels in. “Absolutely. Not.”
Crew grabs my wrist, extending my arm out so they can see him too.
“Ladies, I need to speak to Eleanor for a hot minute. Privately. I’m stealing her, but I’m more than happy to give her the fuck back when I’m done.”
A laughed Oh shit pops from Millie’s mouth before he ends the call.
I swear I see red as his palm presses to my stomach and I’m walked backward until I’m against the wall. His face comes too close, his body touching mine.
“We need to call a truce. Right now. Before your little war starts.”
So I was heard. Good, because I’m ready to press nukes.
I huff a laugh, crossing my arms, feeling too enveloped by his scent, by him, but ignoring it anyway.
“No.”
His hand presses to the wall next to me, cornering me in even more.
“Eleanor. I’m not fucking kidding.”
“Neither am I. I did you a favor in the chambers place when I climbed up and kissed you to shut you the fuck up so we didn’t get buried further down in your bullshit. You got a favor out of me…so now there are no more fucks left for me to give you.”
We’re deadlocked, eyes laser focused on each other. Crew pushes off the wall and turns around, walking a few steps away and wiping a hand down his jaw before he spins back around.
“If this gets out…that we got drunk-married like two idiots, my entire life goes up in flames. The deal I have in place with the Niners will go south because it makes me look too impulsive and untrustworthy…”
“That’s a you problem, QB. I’m over here fighting for my life, trying to figure out how to keep my job and not get fired. And news flash, I don’t have millions to land on when I fall.”
His eyes search mine as his brows pull together.
“I’ll give you money. Whatever you’d make for the month.”
I instantly recoil.
“Eww. No, that is not what I meant…I don’t want your money.”
“Then what? I get that this fucks with your life. And I don’t want to be stuck with you any more than you want to be stuck with me. But the consequence of what we did is about to hurt two people I care about. So, you need to help me make that not happen.”
He means TJ and Nate. I forgot about them. He said they were a part of his deal. I was so focused on my own shit that I never even considered them.
I might be good at being a twat, and he may be just as good at it too. But I’m not a monster. My eyes close as I nod my head, saying my words on a hard exhale.
“Fine. What do I have to do? But to be clear, this is for TJ and Nate because they’re cool as hell. Even if they have shit taste in friends.”