Like brushing up against heaven.
My lips move hungrily over his. I knew he was yearning for this, I didn’t expect the reverse to be true as well.
Thanatos falls into the kiss with all the intensity I’ve come to expect from him. But just when I feel like his passion is going to consume us both, his hands move up to my cheeks, cradling my face. He slows his movements, and the kiss goes from passionate to intimate.
“My kismet,” he murmurs against my lips, “my Lazarus.”
I pinch my eyes at the endearments, wanting to shut this part out—the part where he slips his way under my skin and sinks into my bones.
“How can I make you like me as I like you?” he says in between strokes of his lips.
I would laugh if I didn’t find the thought so alarming.
I pull away and lean my head against his. “It’s not that simple.”
Our kiss might’ve ended there, but the horseman isn’t done with me. He peppers light kisses along my jaw, then my neck. He moves his mouth to my shoulder, his lips dragging over the skin. His fingers grasp the thin strap of my dress, and he pulls it away, his mouth sliding over my flesh.
Aren’t you tired of fighting?
His long ago words taunt me. I am tired, and not just of this battle between earth and whatever lies beyond.
I’m tired of pushing back against this attraction to him. I’m tired of my head overruling my heart. I’m tired of everything being so damned complicated when it doesn’t have to be.
This is the apocalypse. All rules have gone out the window.
So I lean forward, pressing my lips to his ear. “Touch me,” I demand. Only now, as I lean back, it’s me who reaches for the straps of my dress.
I’m not wearing anything under the dress, so when I pull them down, I expose my breasts.
Thanatos sucks in a breath, entranced, and then he’s gathering me to him, lifting me a little so that my chest is closer to his face. He does touch me then—just not with his hands.
His bows his head, pressing a kiss to the soft flesh above one of my breasts. He draws his teeth over the skin, and I can’t help the goosebumps that break out along my flesh.
I thread my fingers through his wavy hair, enjoying the silken strands, which are nearly as soft as his wings.
And now Death’s hand does come up to my other breast. He squeezes it lightly, his thumb gliding over my nipple, causing me to gasp.
Thanatos groans, leaning his forehead against my chest.
“My God, kismet, you feel better than words can tell.”
I tilt his head up, my eyes meeting his.
This is where I fall.
My lips crash against his. This isn’t like our other kisses. Maybe the change is from the carnality I’ve awoken in Thanatos, or maybe it’s my own. Either way, I’m stripped free of my inhibitions.
I grind wantonly against him, drinking up the guttural sounds he makes.
Thanatos grabs my hips, keeping that pressure between us.
“Lazarus.”
I can’t tell if he’s saying my name as an admonishment or as a plea. I’m not sure he can either. But his hands are pinning me in place, and his eyes are hazy with desire.
I grind against him again, more to goad him than anything else.
“What … is this sensation you have wrought from me?” he says, pulling away a little. He still holds my hips prisoner.
I flash him a sly smile. “Come on, Thanatos, you must have some idea.”
He closes his eyes and tips his head back. I see him swallow.
“Merciful God.” He opens his eyes. “But this isn’t sex.”
“No,” I agree, “it’s not.”
I lean forward, my lips inches from his. “You know of what humans do together. Do you still want that—with me?”
There is a moment, a single moment, where I feel exposed. He could reject me now, I have given him the power to—
“Always,” he says, his face brilliantly alive. “I will always want that with you.”
I smile at him again, though this one is genuine. It’s hard not to feel genuine when the horseman is so unapologetically so.
His eyes flash at the sight of my grin and he leans forward, capturing my mouth again. “Your smiles ensnare me, kismet.”
I kiss him back, still smiling like an idiot against his mouth. Thanatos begins falling into it, but no, no, no, I don’t intend for us to stay here.
Breaking off the kiss, I begin to slide off of the horseman. He catches me, and I can’t help the soft laugh that slips from my throat.
“Trust me, Thanatos, for this, you’ll want me off your lap.”