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Role Playing(68)

Author:Cathy Yardley

Or demi. But he wasn’t even going to try to explain that at this point. She couldn’t even wrap her head around him being bi.

His mother was methodically tearing a paper napkin on the place mat in front of her, as if channeling her need to destroy something. “All right. You can keep seeing Maggie,” she said, with obvious reluctance. “But nobody needs to know about . . . the other thing. We can keep it quiet. Sheryl, that means you too.” She glared daggers at her daughter-in-law.

“That’s not happening.”

“Are you trying to make my life miserable?” Now her glare shifted to him. “You’re just going to cause talk!”

“Well, maybe I can just leave town, then.”

He hadn’t meant to blurt that out. But it was a thought that had been turning around in his mind for a while. Of course, now he had Maggie to consider.

Hopefully, Maggie would still be open to being a consideration. He frowned.

When he refocused on the scene in front of him, he saw that all three of them were staring at him with shock. “You’re moving?” Davy asked first.

“Figures you’d leave,” his mother said, but her voice shook a little.

“What kind of son are you?” Sheryl added, her look venomous. “What kind of person are you?”

“I’m not leaving immediately, but it’s been a long time coming.” Aiden crossed his arms, surveying all of them in turn before zeroing in on Sheryl. “And why shouldn’t I? What you’re saying is, Mom can be a total biphobe and hypocrite . . . but I should stay here to take care of her despite it, no matter how she treats me. She can make choices, like driving a car despite having multiple accidents and incidents of dizziness and falling . . . but I need to be the one to deal with the consequences of her choices. Also, I need to deny who I am while I do that and ensure that she never hears gossip about me, which I can’t even control.”

Sheryl paled. His mother spluttered.

“Oh, and it’s fine that you treat me like a monster in front of my nieces, telling them God knows what . . . while you two refuse to come out here and take care of Mom, because I’m here.” He felt like he was drowning, but he kept his gaze firm. “Monster that I am.”

Davy looked appalled. “Aiden, it’s not like that.”

Sheryl looked like she’d swallowed a lemon. “We have busy lives . . .”

“I love you,” he said. “All of you—even though you might not believe it, Sheryl. But I’m not going to keep putting up with this shit. I’m not going to be punished when I haven’t done anything wrong.”

“Ha,” Sheryl spat out, “you act like—” only to have his mother begin talking in the same moment.

“This is all your fault—” his mother started.

To Aiden’s surprise, Davy actually cut across all of them. “Quiet!”

Sheryl stared at Davy, mouth agape. Even his mother looked surprised. Davy was the easygoing one, the charming one. Now, he looked older, almost stern. He rubbed at his eyes with the heels of his palms. “That Maggie lady was right, Sheryl. Do you have any idea how shitty I feel when you treat Aiden the way you do? The way you act around Aiden? After all these years?”

Sheryl looked stunned.

Davy looked at Aiden. “I knew that you . . . well, I mean, I thought you were gay,” he said. “Sheryl said you were. But I didn’t know that you were in a relationship. Hell, I didn’t even think you did relationships.” He rubbed his hand over his face, then turned his gaze back to Aiden. “I guess you’ve been hiding a lot.”

“I didn’t do relationships for a long time. I’m demisexual too,” Aiden decided to throw in, since Davy seemed to actually be listening for the first time in forever. “Just figured that out, actually. In my case, that means I am attracted to people very rarely, although it can happen. So it’s not like I’ve been in all these secret relationships or hooking up with people on the low or whatever. Honestly, I thought there was something wrong with me for a long time.”

“I . . . don’t know what demisexual means,” Davy admitted, rubbing the back of his neck. “But I’ll, um, learn.”

“Get out,” his mother said again, grabbing the coffee mug in front of her with a tight grip, like she was tempted to throw it at him.

Aiden sighed. Then he looked at Davy.

“I tried,” Aiden said in a low voice. “But I’m not going to stay here, continuing to get kicked. Mom, you deserve to be treated with respect . . . but I deserve that too. And if you can’t give that to me, then I guess we are done.”

He turned, heading out the door, Davy hot on his heels.

“You can’t just leave!”

“Why not?” Aiden asked. “I have felt like shit most of my life in this family. I had a college boyfriend who kept me hidden and made me feel ashamed for loving him. Then I was with Sheryl, who made me feel like my past was something I should hide, and who punished me when I was finally honest. My own mother wants me to let her do whatever the fuck she wants, including endangering herself and others . . . all the while hating what she knows about me and demanding I be less than I am. I’m surrounded by people who are supposed to love me, as long as I somehow become what they expect of me. And I’m done, okay? I. Am. Done.”

Davy looked at him, and for a second, it was like when they were kids . . . Davy looking at him, his eyes soulful and rimmed with tears after a skinned knee, as Aiden bandaged him up because their parents were both at work. Davy, who wanted so desperately for Aiden to make him all better.

Davy, who was used to Aiden fixing things.

“I’ll get Mom to calm down,” Davy said. “And Sheryl and I are going to have a serious talk. This has gone on way too long, and I’m sorry I didn’t deal with it sooner. It just seemed easier, especially since we didn’t see you that often.”

“You didn’t see me that often,” Aiden pointed out, “because Sheryl wouldn’t let you.”

Davy hung his head. “Shit. Yeah.”

“And you’re going to need to take care of Mom now,” Aiden said, gentling his tone. “She’s lucky, she has the church group that she’s close to. She loves them, and they’re like family. But things are going to start happening now. She’s right, she’s an adult, and it was perhaps wrong of me to try to force her. But I’m not going to sit here and act like it’s fine that she ignores assigning power of attorney and advanced directives. I’m sure as hell not pretending it’s awesome that she’s driving when I’m afraid she’s going to kill somebody. To top it all off, I can’t sit here and do nothing while she treats me this way . . . then pretend it’s all cool and that I’m going to take her to church and get her groceries and do all the things she claims not to want, as she bitches at me and . . .” He swallowed hard. “And hates me. I can’t, Davy.”

“I’ll fix it,” Davy said, sounding a little more panicked. “I’ll get her to apologize.”

“I need time,” Aiden said, even as he thought There is no fixing this.

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