Suddenly, there’s a quick rap on the stall wall, and I turn.
“Graham,” I murmur, relieved.
“Graham,” Hannah G says. She barely looks at him. He’s not the important brother, and so as per usual, she gives him the bare minimum.
I wrap an arm over Starlight’s back and smile weakly. “Here to wish me luck?”
“No. Here to make sure that you don’t fucking die,” Graham whispers. He grabs my saddle from the wall. “Come on.” He’s already walking down the stable, past Starlight. I slide into the next stall, and gape at the horse inside. He’s enormous, so much bigger than Starlight, and so much more impressive. “We’ll fake like Starlight is sick, okay, so no one will suspect you’re being helped.”
This, I realize, is Pierce’s version of “help.”
It doesn’t surprise me that Pierce’s horse is a white one.
“No,” I whisper, shaking my head.
Graham acts as if he hasn’t heard me, sliding the saddle onto the horse’s back.
“What are you talking about? Widow Maker is a thoroughbred, trained to be the very best. He’ll take you far,” Graham insists. “Most importantly, he’ll take over if you falter. He knows the way.”
The name “Widow Maker” does surprise me.
“Maybe, but I’ve never ridden him. I… I can’t,” I say. Graham is about to buckle the saddle together, so I reach forward, grabbing his wrist, yanking him back. I must take him so much by surprise that he stumbles and nearly falls back into me.
“What do you mean, you can’t?” he spits. “Are you taking this seriously? You could die.”
“Yeah, so could anyone,” I retort. “Jacqueline isn’t even using a saddle.”
“Jacqueline was stupid enough to think that Pen is a pushover,” Graham says sharply. “You’re not stupid.” It feels like he’s calling me stupid if I refuse, and that makes rage flare in my stomach.
“I’m not going to ride him. I’m going to ride Starlight,” I insist. I grab the saddle from him, clutching it to my chest as my heart sinks. This is not the help I was hoping for. “Just… trust me.”
“I do trust you. I don’t trust the rest of those bloodthirsty creatures out there. They’re going to eat you alive. I thought maybe some of them would be different, but they aren’t. They will lie and steal and kill,” Graham presses.
“How would you know? You didn’t have a Finish.”
Graham’s eyes narrow. “I know the women in my family.”
“Your aunt already wants me to win. She’d have given me this horse at the start if she thought it was best. I’m not your responsibility,” I say simply.
Graham groans. “You’re starting to feel like one.”
I roll my eyes because I can’t help it as I stalk out past him, rejoining Starlight to saddle her. I focus on her to calm my nerves, but Graham’s claiming responsibility for me keeps creeping into my thoughts. Our relationship is based on his teaching me to ride. He’s self-righteous and arrogant and none of it is charming, not like it might be on someone else. Sure, he’s patient. And sure, he has actually helped me, even though he’s an ass about it.
But he’s the wrong brother. The other brother, I remind myself.
I shake it away. It doesn’t matter now. I have to focus.
I step up into the stirrup and swing my foot over Starlight. I slide into the saddle and sit up taller. Graham stands against the far wall, watching me. He looks small from this angle, and he looks afraid. Somehow, seeing him afraid makes me feel less so.
“Hey, Adina,” Graham says quietly.
“Yeah?”
“You should try to stay on the outside of the path.”
I pause. “What?”
Graham presses his lips into a thin line. “The path is carved in a way that if you stay outside, it’ll bring you closer to the jumps and make them easier to charge. And when you get to the fork in the road, take the right. I know the map doesn’t show that there’s a fork, but there is a fork. If you go to the right, it’ll take you away from the Taxis Ditch.”
The Taxis Ditch is the most dangerous obstacle, supposedly responsible for the death of more than one horse, and definitely more than one girl.
“Why are you telling me this now?” I ask. He could’ve told me before. But he didn’t.
Another part of Pierce’s help or…
Graham frowns at me. “I was trying to tell you last night but then you ran off to Leighton. And, well, especially if you aren’t taking Widow Maker, you need to know. You’re a shitty rider… Good for a novice. But generally, shitty.”
“Thanks. Asshole.” Still, I smile. Just a little bit, grateful for the information that might actually help me get through this.
“And, Adina?”
“What, Graham?”
“Don’t die.”
I swallow. “I’ll try.”
I squeeze my thighs and Starlight shifts underneath me, beginning to walk.
I lead her down the hall, but instead of turning right into the ring like in practice, we join the others at the beginning of the road. I line up next to Saint.
Esme sits tall in her saddle, a look of complete intensity on her face. On one side of her is Hawthorne, at the ready. And on the other, Jacqueline stands next to her stud, saddle in her trembling hands.
Penthesilea stands in front of her, beatific smile on her face as she reaches out. When she kisses Jacqueline’s cheek in thanks, it’s a mark for death. Penthesilea passes the saddle along to Mr. Caine with purpose, then pushes up onto her horse, swinging a leg over the saddle and sitting there like she was born for it. And all Jacqueline can do is watch.
Jacqueline senses my gaze and her head snaps around to look at me, like a great bird of prey. She hisses something up at Esme, and when Esme looks over, her gaze narrows on something past me, her lips curling into a sneer. I try to read her lips and it looks like Esme whispers to Jacqueline—“See, he’s helping—”
“Didn’t take my offer, I see?”
I jump, startling Starlight, as I look down at Pierce Maxwell Remington IV. He smiles up at me. He looks dressed for a Saturday afternoon at the country club, not a morning race to our potential deaths.
“Widow Maker is beautiful, but… he’s not mine,” I say.
“Integrity. That’s… different,” Pierce says. He sounds caught between disappointment and dawning wonder, like he couldn’t imagine anyone turning down anything from him. He mumbles the word to himself again as he continues past me, going to stand before all of us with his hands clasped behind his back. In an instant, he transforms, standing taller, looking surer as he addresses us. “I’m sure my aunt has relayed to you what this Ride means. It is a measure of your grit. Your intensity. Your passion. Your drive. How far will you go for what you want? I look forward to accompanying the winner tonight and lending her my ear to hear what other things she hopes to accomplish.”
Pierce steps to the side, and I can hear some of the other girls shifting. I look down the row and Esme looks even more intense, and just past her, in a funereal swathe of black, Penthesilea allows her gaze to follow her boyfriend. A boyfriend who hasn’t looked at her once.