Understanding his words is difficult. I once fell in love with him. He was the pain-in-the-ass brother of my best friend who liked to tease me, but it was harmless and fun, and I would do anything to go back to that.
Oh how differently I would do things if I could go back. No lies. No secrets. No holding back on telling everyone we were together.
I try to walk away again, but Kade grabs my wrist. “You’re being dramatic. Not here. Get in the fucking car.”
I tug out of his grip and turn, but I only get two steps before he swears under his breath, snatches me off my feet and throws me over his shoulder.
The world turns upside down, and I gasp as I beat my fists into his back and kick my legs. “Put me down, you asshole!”
My thrashing around does nothing given the muscles he has.
“I don’t have time for your bullshit, Stacey.”
“That’s a lovely name,” a voice says, and Kade stops walking.
I try to see who Kade is looking at, but I’m stuck staring at his ass.
“I’ll have to ask your boss how much she costs. When is your time up with her?”
“Step out of the way, Crawley.”
I grip the material of Kade’s top at his back, frozen in fear as two more guys appear at our side.
“Dvigatsya,” Kade says, and I frown at the language I had no idea he spoke. His tone lowers. “Ona ne prodayetsya.”
The man chuckles deeply. “Ona seichas.”
“Stacey,” another one says, chuckling as he leans down to my eye level and grins at me. “I’d pay a pretty penny for you.”
One of Kade’s arms vanishes from around my legs, though he still keeps me secure over his shoulder, and I hear a gun cocking. “ Don’t make me tell you again. Step out of the way.”
The man looking at me stands up, then he’s out of sight.
“Relax,” Crawley says, back to English. “We come in peace. We’re just curious about your little raven here.”
Kade tightens his grip around my legs. “Get out of my way or I’ll put a bullet between your eyes.”
I groan and cover my ears, waiting for the bang. My dress is somehow still hiding my ass – maybe thanks to the way Kade has positioned his arm.
I hear footsteps on the gravel, and Crawley, the old leader, is watching me as Kade makes his way to the car with the gun at his side, finger still on the trigger.
I’m tossed off his shoulder, my back pressing to the cold metal of the car as he opens the passenger-side door.
“Stop looking at them,” he hisses. “Hey…” He tips my chin. “Eyes on me. Calm down. You’re breathing too fast, and I can’t be fucked with you passing out.”
I had no idea I was panicking until now, until the words hit my ears, and I realise my heart is racing to an unsettling pace, my eyes burning.
I don’t remember getting into the car or clipping my seat belt on. I think he did it.
Another door slams, and the engine turns on, rumbling beneath me. He reverses out of the area like he’s being chased, and I need to grab hold of the dashboard, only narrowly avoiding whiplash, as he swerves the car to the left and accelerates down the road.
“Tell me three of your favourite things.”
I glance at Kade. “W-What? ”
“Three favourite things. Go.”
I focus on my breaths. “Dancing.”
“Keep going,” he pushes as he veers around a corner, not looking at me.
“The Greatest Showman.”
He pauses. “Another.”
“The…” I breathe out a breath. “The dogs. Milo and Hopper. I miss them.”
Kade accelerates again, pushing my back to the seat, and I realise his questions have distracted me – I’m now breathing properly again.
A few minutes pass, the car still speeding along, and I eventually sit back on the seat and cross my arms.
He slows down, then stops at a set of traffic lights. “You should’ve got into the car when I told you to the first time. Now they know your name.”
I don’t reply – I just stare out the window.
The lights from shops and lampposts merge into one blazing colour. My eyes sting, but I keep staring out the window, unable to take in anything he’s saying.
He’s not happy. He’s complaining, but I ignore him, which pisses him off even more.
I’m not sure what he was expecting, taking me into a building full of people like that.
The sun is rising in the distance, but as beautiful as the orange and yellow hues are, I can’t focus. I try to close my eyes and sleep.
My hands are still trembling, and I keep seeing the man’s body dropping to the ground every time I close my eyes. I hear the sound the gun made when he pulled the trigger and feel the way my heart stopped when I witnessed someone being murdered. I remember the way Crawley and his men looked at me – Kade’s whore.
I’ve witnessed Chris beating the shit out of people, watched illegal cage fights and people being bottled and stabbed to injure. But not death. Not murder.
Kade could get arrested and jailed for a long, long time.
“Get out of your head.”
Screw you.
We arrive at the hotel. He takes our bags to reception and asks for a room.
“Two rooms.”
His striking silvery-blue eyes are on me, but I block him out. I need space, and the last thing I need is to be around Kade when part of me fears him.
“Two?” the lady repeats, watching Kade. Thankfully she hasn’t noticed the blood on my face.
A nod, and he sighs. “Yeah.”
He pays for both rooms then thanks the woman. The elevator takes a few moments to arrive, and he scans a card to take us to the eleventh floor.
My room is across from his. He unlocks my door, and I push it open and head inside. He follows me, setting my bag and suitcase next to the bed.
“I have work to do,” he says. “Will you be okay?”
No. “Yes,” I reply, keeping my eyes on the red carpet. It’s almost the same colour as the blood that puddled at my feet. “Please leave. I’ll get an Uber to Luciella later. ”
“Look at me.”
I shake my head.
Kade stands in the doorway, tapping the top of the frame. I flinch as he goes to step forward, and he freezes.
“Don’t be afraid of me, Freckles. Sometimes people need to change to survive.”
I stare at my fingers, twisting them together. “What language was that you spoke?”
He runs his thumb across the seam of his lips, a freshly rolled joint at the back of his ear. “Russian.”
I nod, unable to ask anything else.
He waits a long minute before he leaves, the door closing with a delicate click. I don’t hear him opening his own room door, but I do hear his footfalls growing quieter as I head to the bathroom and fill the sink.
Washing the blood off my face takes a few minutes. Then I tug my dress from my shaken body and stare at my exhausted, distraught reflection.
There’s no light in my eyes, only tears for the boy I once knew.
I wash in the sink again, but it’s not enough. I feel dirty.
Showering does nothing to warm the chill in my spine. Neither does wrapping myself in a blanket and watching the sun move across the sky.
A few hours later, I hear sirens. Are the police on their way to arrest Kade?