He smirks. “You better get on the bike then.”
Idiot .
I know for a fact he means it too. If I tell him to bend me over, he will. Why is there a daring part of me that wants him to? We’d get caught and arrested for indecent exposure and public sexual acts, no doubt.
Not that we haven’t fucked in public.
When he sees I’ve given up the argument, he looks amused with himself and goes over to the bike, checking all the buttons or whatever it is that has his attention.
“Where are we going?”
He shrugs. “A drive. Somewhere to pass time.”
“Because you’re hiding from the she-devil?”
Kade glances up at me as he turns on the bike, the roar of the engine making me jump. My insides flip, and I’m not sure if I’m turned on or terrified. Maybe both.
“Exactly. Who are you hiding from?”
“Why do you do what you do?” I ask instead of replying as Kade hands me my helmet. “Like, the bad stuff and the… escorting.”
He rubs the back of his neck before pulling on his helmet, visor up. “The money?”
“Are you asking me or telling me?”
The stupid helmet won’t sit right, and when I try for the fourth time, he steps towards me, taking it from my hands. “It’s good money. There’s nothing wrong with being a sex worker.”
“I never said there was. I’m a pole dancer, and we’re always sexualised. I’d never shame someone for their profession.”
He doesn’t respond, loosening the straps. His dark lashes are so long and thick. I stare at them, at his brows and the small bruise on his cheek .
Let me fucking kiss you.
I wanted him to kiss me. But it would be too complicated if I let him. My feelings are still there – he’s just passing time.
I gulp. I was his first, and at one point, he told me he couldn’t imagine ever fucking anyone else. We were in love. We had a future, and we were going to make Luciella understand what we meant to each other. No one could come between us. Ever.
Then someone did.
“How did you get involved in that line of work?” Please, just tell me. I need to understand. I want to understand. “Is that why you were trained to use a gun?”
“I was trained to use a lot of weapons.” He reaches up behind me and pulls at my ponytail until it’s loose, wrapping the band around his wrist. Kade runs his fingers through my hair, messy in my face. His tone is soft. “Stop asking questions.”
“When did it start?”
“Why did you fuck him?”
I stare at him, wide-eyed. “I… I…” Say it, Stacey. Say it!
Kade shakes his head at my silence. “Exactly. Stop asking me questions and I won’t ask you.”
I lower my gaze. “I just want to understand.”
The helmet fits over my head perfectly now, and he fastens the clip at my chin. His closeness is making butterflies go wild, and I want to hug him. I have the sudden, annoying urge to crush my body into his in an embrace.
I want to cry – to sob in his arms.
Kade steps back, his eyes tracing my body, from my dress to my shoes and then up to the large helmet. “You don’t need to understand. It’s my life now.”
“Do you enjoy it? You can at least tell me if you’re happy.”
Lips thinning, he pulls his visor down then throws his long leg over the bike and taps the seat behind him. “Get on.”
“Will you ever quit?”
He sighs. “Come on, Stacey. It’s been two years. There’s no reason for you to know any of this.”
I cross my arms. “Can you quit?”
His head drops in annoyance. “It’s very improbable that the opportunity to walk away comes up. Now, get on, unless you want the second option? Fucking you in only a helmet sounds hot.”
I stand beside the bike. “But—”
He hits my visor, and it closes over my face, ending the conversation. He can’t see through the tint, but I’m narrowing my eyes at him as he holds out his hand to help me climb on behind him.
Kade looks over his shoulder. “The helmets are hooked up to the bike’s Bluetooth. Connect your phone.”
“Why would I do that?”
I can tell he’s raising a brow. “Music.”
“While you’re driving?” I ask, mortified. “No! You need to concentrate.”
“Stop being annoying. I’ve shot guns while driving and have never even come close to crashing.”
I slap his shoulder. “You did what? And what if you go too fast and I can’t hold on and fall off?”
The bike vibrates under me as he kicks the stand. He raises his voice so I can hear. “Just connect your fucking phone, Stacey. ”
I lean back and pull my phone out. “You know, Base shouldn’t be calling Luciella Moodypants when she has you as a brother.” The helmet beeps as my Bluetooth connects and I open my music playlist. “You’re by far the moodiest person I’ve ever met,” I say under my breath.
“I heard that,” he replies, his voice now echoing in my helmet.
Of course. “Just when I thought I’d get some peace from you.”
I don’t hear what he replies as “4runner” by Brenn! starts playing.
He reaches behind him and takes my arms, snaking them around him. “Hold tight, Freckles.”
I shriek as he takes off, and I decide that this will be my last day on earth. He’s going far too fast, and I think I might fly off.
The bike dips to the side as he takes a right, and I’m sure I’m about to lose a kneecap.
“I’m scared,” I admit, screwing my eyes shut on a scream as he pushes forward through traffic. “Slow down!”
“Every time you scream, I’ll go faster.”
“Fuck you!” I yell over the music. “Fucking fuck you, Kade Mitchell!”
I hear the smile as he says, “I will as soon as we stop.”
“I’m going to kill you.”
He laughs again.
I wrap my arms around him tighter as he sets off to the right, the wind whipping my hair around us. He zips to the side more, so close to hitting the ground, and I find myself gripping his top.
“I’m so cold,” I gasp.
Kade quickly slows down and pulls off to the side. “You should’ve said.” The helmet comes off, then he pulls off his hoodie and gives me it. “Here.”
“Won’t you get cold?”
He shakes his head as he puts the helmet back on.
Kade helps me get my helmet off and pulls the hoodie over me before putting the helmet back on. I sigh at the warmth. I feel him around me. My helmet rests against his back as he starts off, going at a steady pace before he speeds up, and my pulse spikes from the adrenaline.
I keep my eyes open this time, enjoying it, the view around us merging until it becomes a mass of lights and colours, and I find myself smiling.
I’m smiling so hard my face hurts.
He slows as we approach a stop sign and waits for cars to pass at the intersection. “I heard you giggle, Freckles. I think you secretly like it.”
“I did not,” I say through a grin, my arms still around him, even though we’re not moving. “I coughed.”