The weight in her stomach grew to a pit—a pit that her very being was falling into, flailing, and drowning.
Wine would be good now. Norah’s hands shook as she dropped her pear on the tray, poured herself a chalice, and drank. Deeply. Everything she knew of life had been born in the last two days. She’d only just arrived in this strange kingdom she was to call home and was already a pawn in a game she didn’t understand.
“And,” Catherine continued, “with this marriage, you’ll become queen of the new Aleon Empire.”
“So, there’s a new one now?” Of course. But she didn’t want to be queen of the new Aleon Empire. She didn’t want to be queen of Mercia. She didn’t want to be a queen at all.
Catherine’s frown deepened. “I know this is difficult for you, stepping into a life you don’t remember, but it carries a great obligation, and I beg you to take it seriously.”
Her grandmother’s words sobered her. She swallowed as she set her chalice back on the table. “I do take it seriously. It’s just very difficult to absorb everything, especially a surprise marriage.”
“This marriage has been long in the making, with many marriages between Mercia and Aleon in our history. I myself am from the Aleon kingdom of Eilor. Your mother was from Songs.”
Norah poured more wine into her chalice and took another drink.
“Mercia is a kingdom of honor,” Catherine said, “and joins Aleon in cause. We share the same values, the same beliefs, the same language. An alliance between our two kingdoms is an essential one, for each fortifies the other. It’s why Phillip has been so patient. But the council isn’t patient and shoves the option of your cousin’s hand at him at every turn. Now that you’re back, they’ll be eager to see you crowned and wed in short order.”
Norah’s head reeled. She suddenly didn’t feel very well. Just then, the chamber door swung open, and ladies made their way in with dresses, fabrics, and trays of glittering accessories.
Catherine stood and pulled Norah to her feet. “It’s a lot, I know, and as I said, you’ll have to learn quickly. But you’re strong, and I’ll help you sort everything out.”
The queen regent turned and worked through the array of dresses before she settled on one of her liking. Norah found herself amid a flurry of activity as servants rubbed her skin with scented oil, helped her into a deep-ruby gown, brushed out her hair, and powdered her face. But she barely registered what was happening.
Married. She was to be married. She could barely remember her own name and she was going to be married to… Wait—what was his name?
“So, we’ll see the council this morning,” Catherine told her. “There’s no avoiding it, but you needn’t worry. It’s merely to present you and share your return.”
“Will Alexander be there?” Alexander was… safe. And known. And she needed something safe and known. She wanted him by her side. Right now.
“You must use his proper title, Norah.”
His title. She nodded blankly. What was his title? Lord justice.
Her grandmother sighed. “I can assure you that he’ll never be far from you, but put the lord justice from your mind and focus on the council. I’m sure they’ll have questions about where you’ve been, and we’ll have to navigate through them carefully, but I’ll keep it as short as possible. Just remember to…”
Catherine’s words blurred into an echo inside her mind, and Norah’s stomach knotted. She didn’t want this: not the weight of it all, not the marriage, not the dress or the scented oil, and certainly not the necklace that her grandmother held up to her.
She stumbled backward and caught herself against the wall. The room swirled around her.
Catherine paused. She set the necklace down and took Norah’s hand, steadying her. “Take a breath,” the woman told her, and she did.
The room steadied, and so did she. Norah looked up to find Catherine staring back at her with a deep sadness in her eyes. Her grandmother pulled her closer and brought her hand to Norah’s cheek. “I’m so sorry, my darling. I wish I had more time to prepare you for this. The weight of the world is on your shoulders, I know. Your life is not your own, and I understand how difficult it is to come to terms with that. But you must do exactly as I tell you. So much depends on it—you, your people, all of us. Do you understand?”
Her mind understood, but her heart still wavered.
“I’ll be by your side every step of the way,” Catherine said.
And Norah found herself nodding, just not exactly in agreement.
Nausea rippled through Norah as she stepped out of her chamber and into the large arched hall of white and light. Perhaps she’d had too much wine. Or not enough. The sun reflecting off the marble nearly blinded her, but she walked, unseeing, in more ways than one.
She envied the woman who had stood at the window in the dark only a few hours earlier, before she knew of this Shadow King that wanted her dead, before she knew she’d be wed to a stranger. As if waking up as heir to the crown and with no memory wasn’t enough. Her grandmother walked briskly beside her, like this was all normal. Was this to be her normal? She looked back over her shoulder at the guard that followed close behind. Was this her life now?
As they turned a corner, she spotted a familiar face waiting at the end of the hall, and suddenly, the weight of it all seemed to lighten.
Alexander.
Their eyes locked as she approached. And his stare…
“Princess Norah,” he greeted her with a bow once she reached him.
“Lord Justice,” she replied. Using his title felt awkward to her, but he gave a small smile, and it settled her. “Am I overdone?” she asked sheepishly, glancing down at her gown. It was a rhetorical question. She was entirely overdone.
“Not at all,” he assured her. “You look… very regal.”
“I should. All this took an absurdly long time.”
His smile widened.
“Good morning, Lord Justice,” Catherine greeted him with a sternness in her voice.
Alexander snapped to with a quick bow, and Norah looked on in amusement as she suspected he hadn’t even noticed her grandmother.
“Good morning, Queen Regent,” he replied to Catherine. “I trust you’ve rested well.”
“As well as all this excitement would permit.”
“The council waits in the judisaept,” he told them.
The queen regent looked at Norah. “Remember what I told you, and you’ll fare just fine.”
Norah’s pulse quickened. Catherine had run through what to expect and how to respond to the council while Norah had been shoved into her dress and powdered like a ball of dough, but she still drew in a nervous breath. Remembering wasn’t her strong suit at the moment. Catherine had told her to keep silent about her memory loss, but she still didn’t understand why. Surely people would figure it out right away. She tried to push her fear from her mind and followed after her grandmother.
The judisaept was a smaller room than Norah had expected, given the stature of the castle she’d seen so far, but it was no less splendid. Carved beams ran along the walls and between the stone, reaching to the ceiling. In the center hung a large iron chandelier holding candles within delicately blown glass flutes. Underneath sat a rectangular table, with beautifully scrolled trestles. Large shields adorned the walls. They weren’t made for decoration, as each of them bore the marks of battle.