But sometimes, we’re given another chance. We begin again.
“What are you smiling at?” Jonathan asks when I pull away.
“Nothing,” I say, then stand up and gather the container, the fork, the used napkin. I stuff them all into the tote and pull it onto one shoulder.
My brother pushes away from the table and stands slowly, gazing out at the water. I watch him and wonder if he thinks about the ice, the bite of it against his skin and the sudden, savage understanding that life is a fickle, fleeting thing. A free fall. I hope not. I hope he thinks about the moments when we rise.
“You ready?”
When Jonathan turns, I link my arm with his to walk the forsythia path. He doesn’t need his cane. He can lean on me.
ACKNOWLEDGMENTS
EVERYTHING WE DIDN’T SAY was written during the most difficult season of my life—and then a global pandemic hit. My solitary days of writing in a fog of sadness and uncertainty were suddenly filled with homeschooling kids, grief-stricken teenagers, and the ever-present threat of a potentially life-threatening illness. Needless to say, I wrote under duress. Often poorly.
The fact that this book is in your hands is a testament to the tenacity and hard work of a small group of people who never gave up on me or Juniper’s story. I’m not sure I deserved their attention and devotion, but I will be forever grateful for it.
This is my tenth book, and Danielle Egan-Miller has been my agent and friend since almost day one. I’m sure it was disconcerting to see me so uncharacteristically lost, but she patiently helped me find my way and encouraged me through every draft and rewrite. Undying thanks also to the Browne & Miller team （Ellie Roth and Mariana Fisher）， who are smart and fierce and advocate so hard for me.
Daniella Wexler has always been an excellent editor, but she outdid herself on Everything We Didn’t Say. Her attention to detail and subtle, perfectly on-point influence is all over the pages of this book. I love working with her and hope we remain a team for many books to come.
Dear friends Tosca Lee and Kimberly Stuart offered help and advice （as well as shoulders to cry on） at integral points throughout the process. And my Tall Poppy community was, as always, a safe haven and place to be real about all my fears and frustrations.
Finally, my family set aside their own distress to support me as I wrote in the most unforgiving of circumstances. The world went wild around us—and we sometimes fell to pieces ourselves—but we persevered. From failed at-home science experiments to drive-in graduations, and days locked up at home to those first few forays into the “real world,” we made it. We lived our own dystopian novel and it changed us. I pray we are kinder, wiser, stronger.
Reader, if you’ve made it this far, thank you. It’s hard to put into words just how proud I am of us all. Of our resilience and tenderness, our perseverance and hope. May we continue to rise to the challenge and find ourselves on the other side transformed.
EVERYTHING WE DIDN'T SAY
NICOLE BAART
Topics & Questions for Discussion
At the beginning of Everything We Didn’t Say, Juniper pulls into Jericho and we see the small town through her eyes. What can you infer about her childhood and her complicated connection to her hometown in these first few pages?
Juniper’s relationship with her mother is fraught to say the least. Rebecca makes her feel exiled from Jericho and unworthy of a meaningful relationship with her own daughter. But on page 324 Reb refutes that belief by explaining why she pushed Juniper away: “Don’t you see? I saved you. I wasn’t going to let you repeat my mistakes.” What do you think? Was Juniper banished? Or did Reb save her by ensuring that she went to college, finished her degree, and led a successful, independent life?
Fatherhood also plays an important role in Everything We Didn’t Say. Juniper never knew her biological father, and her stepfather was often stiff and aloof. How do you think this affects her as both a teen and a grown woman?
They say that opposites attract and that’s certainly true in Everything We Didn’t Say. Lawrence and Rebecca and Sullivan and June are a couple of obvious mismatches. What makes their relationships work? Or do you think they were doomed from the start? Are there other unexpected pairings?
When they were teenagers, June knew that her best friend, Ashley, had a significant crush on Sullivan. Still, June allows herself to fall in love with him. Do you think her actions are unforgivable or understandable?
When talking with Cora, teenage June wonders: “What are Jericho’s ideals?” Cora says: “Community. Family. Faith.” June counters: “Tradition. Uniformity. Compliance.” Who do you agree with? Why?