“Never again,” I say, shaking my head solemnly. But I did it! I managed to secure the senior counselor job. Even though it was a long, sometimes difficult summer, I did it.
“The way I see it, you’ll be Ethan’s problem,” Gary says. “I won’t be here next summer.”
“Why not?”
“Time to hand over the reins. Plus, Ethan’s more than ready to take over.” Gary seems nonchalant about it.
Ethan knows Gray Wolf inside and out. He’s been a camper since he was six, a junior counselor, a senior counselor, and now the assistant director. He deserves it, and we’ll have our first ever disabled director.
“I’m sure he’s excited,” I say. “We’ll miss you, though!”
“I’ll find a way to stop by and see how all the renovations are looking. I’m excited for you all.” Gary beams at me. “Any questions about the gig?”
“Oh, I don’t know.” I wasn’t expecting this conversation right now.
Gary glances at his papers again, then smiles back at me. “If you think of any, just let me know. Ethan will be in touch with the particulars next spring.”
“Do I still have to interview, or . . .”
“This was the interview. I’ve already talked it over with Ethan. He’ll be thrilled to know you’re on board.”
“Awesome.”
“Now, do you mind sending Phoebe my way? I’ve got a question for her as well.”
I weave through some of the younger kids running around and head back to where Phoebe is waiting for me at the benches. “Hey, so, Gary has something to ask you.”
“Oh, do you think it’s about next summer?” She’s already shaking with excitement.
“Possibly. Ethan asked me a while ago if you’d be interested. Deep breaths,” I say, reaching out to steady her shoulders. “Want me to guide you over?”
“He’s just right there?” She nods ahead, unfolding her cane. “I’m on it.”
I wait patiently while Phoebe walks over and chats with Gary for a few minutes. She’s beaming when she hurries back. “All right! You’re looking at next year’s junior counselor!”
“Yes!” I crash into her with a hug. “They better assign you to my group.”
* * *
I reapply some bug spray before heading to my second-to-last on-duty shift of the summer. When I arrive at the firepit, Isaac’s already got a flame going. He’s sitting on the rocks, poking the kindling with a long stick.
“You look happy,” he signs as I walk over.
“I got some good n-e-w-s earlier.” I toss my backpack on the top of the picnic table, not caring that the surface is still damp from a light smattering of afternoon rain.
“Can spell n-e-w-s, or similar to ‘inform,’ ” he signs for me, bringing his folded hands from near his head to extended open palms. “What is it?”
“Guess who’s a senior counselor next summer?”
“You are?”
“Yes,” I sign, doing a little dance as I walk over to him, wearing his hoodie, putting my arms up and flapping the sleeves around with excitement.
“That’s awesome! I’m happy for you.” He offers a hand to help me take a seat on the rocks beside him. My feet are warm by the flames.
“What about you?” I ask, looking up at him.
“What about me?” he signs, bobbing his head. “I’m excited!”
“Are you coming back?”
He tosses more sticks into the fire. “I can’t.”
I expected this response, but that doesn’t make it easier to digest. “Why?” I hold the sign for a few seconds, even though I have a good guess. But if he came back for the rest of this year, why wouldn’t he want to come back for next summer? “We could be together all summer again.”
“I’ve got baseball,” he signs. “For college. It was already hard to make this year work.”
“Oh.” I hadn’t expected this, but I knew he played. I try to think of some way he can come back. “Maybe you can come back and visit camp for a week.”
“Maybe.” He doesn’t look sure.
“You leave for college soon, right?”
“On the last Sunday.”
“Like, the last day of camp Sunday, Sunday?” That’s barely any time together left. Is he leaving straight for the airport? I thought we might be able to find a way to see each other a few more times after camp was over.
He scrunches up his mouth and nods slowly. “But!” His eyes widen with excitement. “Ethan’s planning an end-of-summer surprise in the city for that Saturday night.”
“Yeah, I remember he said that.”
“Yeah. It’ll be awesome.”
I lift my head and gaze at the dark night sky. I wish summer wasn’t so short. “Where are you going to school? RIT, right?”
“No.” He shakes his head. “Gallaudet.”
“Oh,” I say, having assumed because that’s where a lot of counselors had gone before. “I thought you were going to be in New Y-o-r-k, but Gallaudet is in DC, right?” Either way, it’s far away from me.
He nods, reaching back into his backpack to grab something. He nudges my shoulder, so I sit back up and notice that he’s holding two Fruit Roll-Ups.
“Where from?” I ask.
He smiles. “My mom.” He holds up the backpack. It’s crammed with snacks. His mom made sure he didn’t have to go on any more food runs.
“That’s a lot. You’ll never finish it all.”
He takes a bite and shrugs. “More for the plane.”
“Right after camp.”
“Right after camp,” he repeats.
The fire starts to dwindle, so Isaac reaches forward and tosses in another log. I watch the flames engulf it. Isaac’s off to college after this. I always knew this was coming. I can be realistic. Our days are numbered.
“That’s so soon,” I sign.
He wraps his arm around me. I stretch out my legs until my feet are near the fire. I lean against Isaac, finishing the Fruit Roll-Up that’d been dangling from my mouth.
I’ll miss him. I’ll miss the person I am around him.
He can sense my apprehension and leans forward, planting a soft kiss on my forehead. We spend the rest of the night wrapped together in front of the fire as I count the hours we have left together.
* * *
Knowing I’ll be back next year, I try not to be too sad as this year winds to a close, but it’s hard not to get nostalgic as everything turns into a last. Last time at the beach. Last time hiking along the path. Last time playing large-group games on the grassy field. Last time at the pool. Last time the chef serves some sort of sludge for dinner. Last night Isaac and I dance together in the barn, forgetting the world around us.
No matter how repetitive some things seem after an entire summer’s worth—the same songs performed at each talent show, the same cannonball jumps at the lake, and soon, the same tearful farewells that inevitably plague every camp at the end of the season—it’s hard not to be upset that this season is almost over. Saying goodbye to Gray Wolf will never be easy.