There’s only one reason I can think of why people would want to move into one of those places, and it’s because daily life is getting too difficult to manage on their own. But that begs the question that’s been lingering in my mind and I’m sure has crept into his. “How long will they be able to take care of her?”
“Violet turns sixteen in January, so they just need to hang on for a little over two years, until she’s an adult and their legal responsibility is over.”
“They’re not going to kick her out on her eighteenth birthday. And a lot can change in two years when you’re in your eighties.”
“I’m aware of that, Abbi, but what am I supposed to do?” His body stiffens with tension beneath me. I’m sure he’s been dwelling on the answer to that question. “Please, tell me, what’s my role here? Because I’ve been asking myself that all day, and I can’t find the answer. I don’t know the first fucking thing about being a parent.”
“No one does when they start out—”
“This is not starting out. This is having a teenage girl dropped at my doorstep. Is that what you want? A fifteen-year-old—a stranger—suddenly living with us?”
No. I open my mouth but can’t utter the cruel answer, even if it’s the truth. We’ve only just started our lives together. Adding Violet to it would change everything. “This isn’t about what I want.” I would never want Henry to see me as the person coming between him and his daughter.
“Violet clearly doesn’t want it. You were there, you heard her.”
“She needs time to come to terms with everything.” How much time, I can only guess.
“And then what?”
“I don’t know. Look, you’re both processing. No one expects you to know how to deal with this on day one. For now, Violet has a loving home with her grandparents. She’ll be well taken care of, and she can help them. And maybe, once this initial shock is over, she’ll be willing to let you in.”
His chest lifts with a deep breath. “Children terrify me.” He says it softly, like a confession.
“Which children?”
“All of them.”
My stomach clenches. Is this where he tells me that he’s changed his mind, that he doesn’t want them anymore? No. I stop myself from heading down that path and instead ask, “What’s so scary about them?”
He pauses. “The way they can change your life in a heartbeat. One minute they don’t exist and then they do, and everything suddenly feels different.”
“Different, but not bad, right?” I hold my breath.
“No, not bad,” he admits after a moment.
I release the softest sigh of relief. “You didn’t have time to ease into the idea of this. There was no nine-month countdown, no cute little helpless bundle.” Henry got a furious teenager in muddy Chucks, throwing a contract at his feet before storming off.
“She’s been alive for almost sixteen years and I had no fucking clue. Sixteen years.” His voice grows husky. “How many times did that kid ask about her father? How many times did she wonder why I didn’t care?”
My heart aches for him as he struggles with his conscience. “That wasn’t your fault.”
“She seems to think it is.”
“No. She’s angry. Probably angrier at her mother than you, but you’re here and Audrey’s not, so you’re going to get the brunt of it.”
He seems to consider that, his chest rising and falling in slow, steady breaths, his heart beating hard against my ear.
“This wasn’t your fault.” I say each word slowly so he hears them, so they sink in. “And you saw that house, and her grandparents. She wasn’t abandoned—she’s had a good life.” Whatever else Audrey can be accused of, it doesn’t seem like she was a bad mother.
He’s silent for a few minutes. “She’s a stranger to me and yet she’s mine. She came from me.”
“She won’t be a stranger forever.” I smooth my palm over his bare skin. “Not if you make the effort to get to know her.”
I sense him opening his mouth to respond, but he holds back whatever he was going to say, settling his hand over mine.
CHAPTER 10
“Are you sure this isn’t too much?”
Raj stands beside me, hands on hips. “You said you wanted a Gothic-themed dinner party for Halloween.”
“I did.”
“This is a Gothic-themed dinner party.”