“I suppose you’re right,” the god sighed. “So, for a new schedule . . . perhaps we could reserve every other Saturday for demigods to clean sacred objects. Is—is that fair?”
“More than fair,” Annabeth said.
“Totally,” I agreed. “But right now, we’ve got a friend being chased by snakes.”
Annabeth frowned, like I was ruining a nice moment, but Elisson drained his teacup and handed it back to her. “Of course. Good luck saving your friend. And, uh . . .” He swallowed nervously. “If you were serious about a whale yoga course at Poseidon’s palace . . .”
“Oh, I never kid about whale yoga,” I promised him. “I’ll put in a word with my dad.”
Elisson wiped his nose. “Thank you, Percy Jackson. And, Annabeth Chase, you’ve been very kind.”
Then, clutching his packets of herbal tea, Elisson liquefied and spilled over the side of the cliff. I moved out of the way because I didn’t want to get rained on by his runoff.
Once I was fairly sure he was gone, I looked up at Annabeth. “You brought tea? While I’m down here getting tossed around, you’re literally drinking tea?”
She shrugged. “Iris told us he was into yoga. I figured herbal tea might be a good offering.”
She said this as if her line of reasoning made perfect sense, like of course x = 2yz3 where x is yoga and y is tea.
“Sure,” I said. “Got anything else in there that might help us rescue Grover?”
“Bien s?r,” she said, which I think is French for What do you think, Seaweed Brain? She dug a paper bag from her backpack and shook the contents. “Snake treats. The guy at the store recommended hamster flavor.”
“I have so many questions.”
“We should get going. We’re wasting time.”
“You sure we don’t have time for another cup of Meditation Magic? How about you throw me that rope.”
“Not necessary.” She got to her feet. “Just swim downstream. I’ll turn invisible. . . .” She pulled out her magic New York Yankees cap—her favorite get out of jail free fashion accessory. “I’ll go east and find Grover, distract the snakes with these treats, and get him out of danger.”
“While I head west and make myself a new target,” I guessed.
“Exactly,” she said. “Once the snakes are following you, we’ll circle back and rendezvous with you at the cave entrance.”
“And, uh, do I get hamster-flavored Snakie Bakies?”
“You won’t need them.”
“Then what am I supposed to distract them with? And more importantly, how do I get away from them once I’ve gotten their attention? Because, you know, those are the kinds of details I like to have covered.”
Annabeth’s smile told me I was going to hate her reply almost as much as I hated getting pushed off ledges. “You’ve got Iris’s staff. You’ve got the best job of all.”
I can now cross skipping through a field while making rainbows off my bucket list.
By the time I got out of the river, a few hundred yards downstream, Grover was playing his song of last resort. Distant strains of “YMCA” echoed through the cavern. I knew this was a signal that he was running out of energy and breath. Because when somebody plays “YMCA,” it is almost always a cry for help.
Annabeth had instructed me to skip through the fields while holding Iris’s staff. She was pretty sure this would create a beautiful rainbow, which would draw the serpents’ attention with a high level of Ooh, pretty. Meanwhile, she would turn invisible, find Grover, and escort him to safety, tossing Snakie Bakies as needed to keep the serpents away from them.
“And if I can’t get the staff to work?” I asked.
“I have faith,” Annabeth said.
I was pretty sure she was trying not to laugh.
“And if I can’t lose the serpents once they’re following me?”
“Just shut off the rainbow,” she said. “Once you go dark, you should be fine. And whatever you do, don’t stop skipping, Skippy.”
Being a good soldier, I did what she told me. As soon as I trudged out of the river, I put on my shoes and socks—which had washed up in a nearby clump of reeds—and started skipping through the grass.
That lasted about ten feet. Then I realized Annabeth must have been trolling me.
I could run a lot faster than I could skip. I doubted the staff would care. I took off across the fields. Sure enough, after only a few steps, the staff began to glow.