“They were in San Francisco for the weekend. Twentieth-anniversary trip. And tonight, my mom’s getting the Carlton Citizen of the Year Award at Mackenzie Hall, and I’m supposed to introduce her. So this cannot be happening.” Ivy stuffs her phone into her bag with a determined expression. “I have six hours to fix it before they land.”
* * *
—
We maneuver ourselves into a solid surveillance position on the train—in a separate car from Cal, but close enough that we can see him through the glass door. He’s standing with his back to us, shoulders hunched, and there’s something so defeated about his posture that I feel a surge of protectiveness for the guy. Back when we used to hang out, Cal was this really open, friendly, carefree kid. I don’t know who he’s meeting, but if she’s making him look like this, I already don’t like her.
Then again, maybe I just never knew Cal all that well. A lot of things that seemed simple and straightforward back then probably weren’t.
Ivy and I are standing, holding the bar above us, and she’s clenching it so tightly that her knuckles are white. “I guess he’s going to Cambridge,” she says when we pass through North Station and Cal doesn’t budge. There are only two more stops on this line: Science Park and Lechmere in East Cambridge. She shuffles her feet and adds, “So…should we talk about things?”
“What things?” I ask warily, wondering if she managed to read my thoughts. My brain might keep getting stuck in the past, but that doesn’t mean I want to revisit it with her. The more time I spend alone with Ivy, the more sure I am about that.
“You know.” She lowers her voice. “Stuff like…what to tell people. About where we were today, and…everything.”
Everything. Right. It’s only just started to sink in how much everything we have to deal with. My friends, who have no idea where I am, are going to expect an answer soon. Autumn might check in, and what am I supposed to tell her? We don’t keep secrets from one another, even when she’s doing stuff I’d rather not know about. Which is always, lately.
The whole situation makes my head hurt. “One thing at a time, okay? Let’s figure out what’s going on with Cal and worry about the rest later.” I’m not sure how much I even care about what Cal’s up to, to be honest, but he’s a problem that can be solved. Not like whatever happened to Boney.
“But what if we—”
“I said later, Ivy,” I say, my voice rising along with my temper. This isn’t eighth grade, when I’d do whatever the hell Ivy wanted just because she asked.
“Okay, okay,” Ivy mutters, moving away from me as a few passengers idly glance our way. She doesn’t look happy, but oh well.
The train rumbles aboveground at Science Park, and I watch the Museum of Science come into view outside my window. It’s one of the Carlton school system’s favorite field trip destinations, so I’ve been at least a half dozen times. The last time, in seventh grade, I was teamed up with Ivy and Cal for an interactive exhibit where one of the stations tested physiological responses to pictures of different animals. If your pupils got bigger, or your heart rate sped up, that meant you were afraid of that animal.
Ivy and I had fear reactions to stereotypically intimidating creatures—a hissing snake and a snarling crocodile—but Cal only got them when he looked at a rabbit sitting in a flower patch. Ivy couldn’t stop laughing about it. “You’re scared of bunnies, Cal,” she teased.
“I am not!” he protested. “The test is broken.”
“Worked for us,” I said while Ivy continued to crack up.
Then she looked thoughtful. “It’s a good thing the human race has evolved past the hunter-gatherer stage, isn’t it? You wouldn’t last a day in the wild, Cal. You’re afraid of the wrong things.” That’s Ivy for you; she has this way of making observations that seem like throwaways, but end up being weirdly deep enough that you think about them years later. Wherever Cal is headed, I can almost guarantee that it’s bad news and he doesn’t realize it.
Cal doesn’t get off at Science Park, and a minute later a voice over the speaker calls out, “Lechmere, last stop.” Ivy and I sway in place until the train comes to a loud, grinding halt. The doors open, and we funnel onto the open-air platform with the rest of the passengers. We hang back from Cal as he follows the crowd through the turnstiles toward the street and waits at a crosswalk for the light to turn. At this point there’s nowhere for Ivy and me to hide, and all Cal would need to do is turn his head to see us. But he doesn’t. Not at the crosswalk, not on the street, and not as we trail him down the sidewalk until he stops at a squat, blue brick building with a sign that reads Second Street Café.