But with him this close, my vision is all blurred. He confuses me. Is that his intention?
Using every ounce of my willpower, I turn my head to the side. His breaths are sharp puffs against my cheek.
“I’ll go back to Loretta’s,” I whisper. I pull his hand off me and escape upstairs.
I’m lost. More lost than I’ve ever been before. And I have no idea how to find my way back.
The next day, I’m on Loretta’s steps, and I’m a nervous wreck.
Rafaele’s right. I can’t give up after just one try. I wanted to manage famous musicians, but I can’t even figure out how to work with a woman who’s now my family?
Ugh. It’s pathetic.
Nero dropped me off again, but this time, I insisted that he didn’t walk me to the door. I didn’t want to talk to Loretta with him as a witness. He’s probably watching me from the car and wondering why I’m just standing here.
Swallowing hard, I lift my finger to the doorbell. I rehearsed what I’m going to say at least ten times on the drive over, but I feel like I’m going to forget it all as soon as I open my mouth. I squeeze my eyes shut and press the button.
A few seconds later, Loretta’s face appears on the other side of the glass. Her eyes widen with surprise for a split second before they turn weary.
I give her an awkward wave. It’s sunny today, and I’m sweating beneath my jacket from heat and nerves.
She pushes the door open and steps out. “What are you doing here?” she asks carefully.
I shove my hands into the pockets of my hoodie. “I think we started on the wrong foot.”
Her eyes dart to Nero’s car behind me. “Am I in trouble? I’d expected Rafaele to call me yesterday to tell me off for kicking you out.”
“I don’t think he’s going to do that.”
Slowly, her gaze moves back to me. My fists clench inside my hoodie. I’ve never had to do this before—try to win someone over. In the past, when someone didn’t like me, I’d just think, fuck you, I don’t like you either. And I’d act like an asshole. But Rafe’s right. That’s not power. That’s giving up.
“Look, you’re right,” I say. “I don’t know anything about your business. I shouldn’t have waltzed in here and started doling out advice like I know what I’m talking about.”
Loretta’s cheeks turn pink. I don’t know what she’s thinking, but at least she’s not shooing me away.
“I want to learn. Let me shadow you today and see how you do everything around here. I’ll do anything you tell me to. Help you however you’d like. You’re the boss, all right?”
Loretta glances at her feet like she’s embarrassed. “Not a very good boss, I’m afraid,” she mutters. “I shouldn’t have said those things to you. It was rude of me.”
It was pretty rude, but at least she’s woman enough to admit it. That’s more than most people ever do.
“It’s okay,” I say. “So we both fucked up. People make mistakes, right? Why don’t we start over?”
Loretta stares at me for a moment, considering my offer. “Okay. But you listen to everything I say and do exactly as I tell you.”
I grin. “Yes, ma’am.”
A slow smile appears on her face. “Then let’s get to work.”
CHAPTER 25
RAFAELE
It’s past midnight, and my office is bathed in darkness. A single antique desk lamp illuminates the space, casting shadows onto the wooden bookshelves.
I like working in the dark. I find it easier to focus. And I really need to focus if I want to get to sleep in the next hour.
It’s not like me to procrastinate, but it’s been a long week, and I’m drained.
We’ve still got no new leads on who’s behind the Il Caminetto attack. With the trail growing cold, I’m getting less and less optimistic we’ll get to the bottom of this anytime soon.
On top of that, an issue with my capo in Rochester kept me in the city for longer than I would have liked. We captured a Bratva informer who’s been doing surveillance on us to find out which businesses pay us protection. My left hand still fucking aches from hitting his thick skull.
Maybe getting his body back in a suitcase will make the Russian pakhan realize he should stay the fuck out of our state.
Last night, when I got back home after being gone for four days, Cleo was sitting cross-legged on the couch in the living room with her computer in her lap. The moment she saw me, the lines of concentration in her forehead softened, her eyes widened, and her lips quirked up. She missed me.