That made her eyes flash dangerously. "Can you blame me for backing away? Would it have been easier to try to pretend that weekend didn't happen? Film, work, be around each other every single day and just … pretend." Her voice sounded thick. "That sounded like hell to me."
"No, it wouldn't have been easier. I hate pretending. I don't … I don't think I could have." I took a step closer. "But this hasn't been easy either, has it?"
She dropped her head into her hands and exhaled shakily. I got the distinct impression that the only thing allowing her to keep hold on her emotions was if she physically blocked out my presence like that. I took a step back.
"What do you want me to say, Noah?" she asked, voice muffled behind her hands. "I had a shitty day, and I'm tired, and I don't know what you want me to say right now."
"I want you to be honest with me." Curling my hands around her wrists, I gently pulled her hands away from her face. "I know you said that we never had a normal … but … I don't know what to make of that. You were my friend, Molly. I talked to you more than I talked to anyone. I miss you," I told her fiercely. "It was easy to ignore how much when you weren't around, but I do. And I hate how weird things are right now. Don't you?"
I couldn't believe what had just tumbled out of my mouth.
Unpracticed.
Unrehearsed.
Hell, I'd barely registered how I felt, but standing in front of her, it was like someone took a wood-chipper to whatever I'd been using to block out everything I'd suppressed for the past eight weeks.
It was impossible to believe that only a day earlier, I was able to stand back and monitor just how little I felt about my life. Like someone who'd lost the ability to feel pain. You could set your hand on a stove and not register the sensation of blistering skin. And now, watching her expressive face work through what I'd blurted out, I felt everything.
Every pinch of her lips and every shift of her eyes. When they filled with bright tears, I wanted to do anything, anything humanly possible to make it stop. Just the threat of tears on her part, and I felt them like a blowtorch to my gut. But if withstanding the heat, if pressing into it further was what she needed from me, I'd step closer and hold the flames against me for as long as she needed.
Oh, hell.
Rick was right, that asshole.
I'd … I'd fallen in love with her, and it happened without me realizing it.
"Noah," she started, completely oblivious that my heart had just splattered to the ground at her feet. "Of course I do. But …" She trailed off, eyes snapping beyond my shoulder. "Shit. I need to go. I cannot be on camera right now. Not after my day today."
I glanced back and saw Marty sprinting toward us like he was about to catch me mounting Molly on the hood of her car. I pinned him with a look and held up my hand, but he just kept barreling toward us. Thank goodness he was so out of shape. He stopped about forty yards away and braced a hand on his knee to breathe for a second.
"Molly," I begged. "Don't go."
"Please don't make me do this right now. Not on camera." Her eyes were huge and pleading. I nodded and stepped back.
I knew at that instant that I'd do anything she asked of me. Anything, even if it meant letting her drive away.
"Have a good rest of the season, Noah," she said, just before she slammed her door shut.
"What?" I went to grab the door handle and ask her why the hell that sounded like a goodbye, but I stepped back when I heard Marty's pounding footsteps and obnoxiously loud breathing behind me. "You rotten asshole," I told him.
"You let her leave?"
I whirled. "Yeah. She didn't want to be on camera, you dick. You think I'd force her?"
Marty sighed, watching Molly's car leave the parking lot once the security guard lifted the gate. "No."
I gave him a dry look. "Your timing leaves a lot to be desired."
"Molly got fired," he blurted out.
"What?" I yelled.
"That's why I was running out here. I overheard her brother say something about it when I was packing up my gear after practice. You looked like shit today, by the way."
"Why did she get fired?"
"Why do you think?" He shook his head. "She lied to her boss about what happened in South Dakota. I guess Beatrice had added a no-fraternization stipulation in Molly’s contract for this project that covered the cast and crew." He pointed at his chest. "And she ain't sleeping with the crew."