Nikolai says it’s because she’s a born leader. I think it’s because of Lev.
“If she doesn’t, just beat the shit out of her. She won’t come near you or your friends ever again.” When I glance towards her, she’s staring at me with an amused smile on her face. “What?”
“You realize that no normal person, parent, or guardian would give a teenager that advice, right?”
I shrug. “We’re not like other people.”
She slides back against her seat. “You don’t have to tell me that twice.”
“Basement!” Both Polly and I whip around in Lev’s direction. He’s still not looking at either one of us but he’s wringing his hands together anxiously. “I want my basement.”
“I told you, Lev: it’s being sprayed for rodents. You just have to wait a little—”
He jackknifes out of his chair so fast that it falls backwards. Abandoning his half-eaten burger, he darts out of the dining room. Polly is halfway out of her seat when I stop her.
“Leave him. He needs space.”
She falls back into her seat but her smile is gone. Those hazel eyes of hers are pinched at the corners and filled with disappointment. “Sometimes, I forget how… how bad it gets with him.”
“He’ll be fine.”
“No, he won’t,” she retorts curtly. “He won’t be fine, Uri. He’s always gonna be like this. Suspicious of everyone, terrified of change, obsessed with everything familiar…”
“It’s going to be okay.”
“How can you say that?”
“Because I’m going to make sure it is. I’ll look after him, Polly. I’ll look after all of you.”
She sighs and sinks into her chair. “You need a life, Uri.”
“So you keep saying.”
“Because you don’t listen.”
I give her a playful punch on the arm. “This is not something you need to worry about, printsessa. Just focus on yourself, your life; I’ll handle the rest.”
She doesn’t look particularly comforted. “Are you going to tell me what’s really going on down in the basement?”
“Nothing I can’t handle.”
I say it with confidence, but the truth is, I’m not so sure anymore. When I first locked Alyssa in the basement, I felt in control.
Now? Not so much.
Fucking her last night was a mistake. And fucking her like that was piling one mistake on top of the next.
But when I was in the moment, it was impossible to stop. I felt like an addict getting his fix after years of sobriety. Everything about her felt addictive. The way she moaned. The way she moved. The way she called my name.
It was enough to make me look in her eyes while I fucked her. I almost fell headfirst into that pit of quicksand. But I’d put an end to it fast.
And yet…
Here I am, jonesing for another fix.
Just one more hit. One more taste. I tell myself this will be the last time—but I told myself that the last time, too, and look how that’s turned out.
Fuck. I’ve really boxed myself into a corner. And now that Polly is back, there isn’t any room for error.
I need to stay far away from the unassuming little siren in my basement. More importantly, I need to get her out of my basement and off my property.
Once Boris Sobakin is no longer a threat, the little narushitel is gone.
All I have to do now is find a way to be okay with that.
23
ALYSSA
I’m half-awake when I hear movement just outside the basement door.
It has to be either Svetlana or Uri, but neither one makes that much noise before they enter. And neither one has ever visited me in the middle of the night. Thankfully, I’m wearing pajamas—the real unsexy kind, primarily for Uri’s lack of benefit. He can spy on me all he wants, but he’ll have to use his imagination from now on. My body is all caps OFF-LIMITS where he’s concerned.
Especially after the way he left… what was it… two nights ago now?
It still eats at me. Was it so hard to say a simple goodnight? I mean, my God, I’d have settled for a “thanks for the bang, toots.”
But it feels stupid to want even that much. What did he think, that I was going to become all needy and clingy and beg him to stay with me? Although…
I had begged him to fuck me.
But that was… um… that was because—
Actually—what was that?!
I’ve spent the last two nights ruminating on what the hell got into me. Every time I try to get to the bottom of it, I get distracted by the replay that’s been circulating in my head since the moment he walked out the door.