“A-another dream…？”
“Yeah, sweetheart, I’m afraid so.” I reach over to my bedside table and pick up the glass of water I leave there every night. “Here,” I say, handing it over to her. “Take a sip.” She sits up and takes the glass from my hand, pale-faced and tired. “Was it a bad one?”
Polly shrugs. “They’re all bad. This one felt more like a memory. I was in Agapov’s basement, tied up. Except… Uri never comes for me.”
Her lip trembles. In the darkness, wearing one of Uri’s too-big shirts to sleep in and with her hair mussed in a frizzy halo around her head, I really see the fourteen all over her. She’s so young. Way too young to have gone through something this monstrous. It’s not fair.
I glance down at my charm bracelet, thinking about my Ziva, who barely got to live before she died. I guess life’s not fair in general. I know that as well as anyone.
“It is over, though, isn’t it?” Polly rasps suddenly.
I take the glass from her hand and set it back down. I have no desire to lie to her but in the current state she’s in, I don’t see how the truth will help. “Yes, honey,” I say gently. “You’re safe now.”
“Then why are we still here?” she protests. “If there isn’t a threat to us anymore, we should be back home.”
I keep forgetting: Polly is not Lev. She can’t be mollified with half-assed explanations. She can’t be distracted by new toys or new video games.
“We will be soon,” I say. “It’s just that your brother wants to beef up security measures around the mansion before we move back there. Just so that you have complete peace of mind.”
Polly looks down at her hands. She’s bitten her nails clean off. A few have even started to bleed at the cuticles. “Peace of mind,” she scoffs. “I don’t know if I’ll ever have that again.”
I take up her hands in my own. “You will, Polly. You’re stronger than you know and so much more capable than you believe.”
She gives me a small, probably-fake smile. “Thanks for staying with me. I’m glad you’re here.”
I lightly rap the back of her knuckles and smile back. “Stop it or you’re gonna make me cry. Now, lie back down and close your eyes. I’m right here. I won’t let anything happen to you.”
I have no business making her promises like that, but sometimes, you just have to say the words and hope they’ll prove true. She does as I asked, curling up with the blankets raised to her chin and letting her face ease.
After a while, her breathing evens out into the rhythms of sleep.
I hope for her sake it’s a dreamless one.
37
ALYSSA
I’ve just snuck upstairs to get a few minutes to myself when the door opens and Uri walks in. I can’t even bring myself to sit up, but that’s fine, because he seems perfectly content to collapse into bed beside me.
“I was gonna come down in a bit,” I protest meekly.
He rolls onto his side, head propped on his hand, and smirks. “You wanted some peace and quiet. You don’t have to explain that to me.”
Chewing my lip, I ask, “Do you think anyone will miss us if we just stay up here for the rest of the night?”
“I’m gonna do you one better,” he replies. “But it does involve getting out of this bed.”
“Rain check.”
“Not an option, narushitel. Trust me: I’ll make it worth your while.” He pushes off the bed and I hear him walk towards the door. He doesn’t leave, though. It sounds like he’s picking something up and walking it back over to me. “This is for you.”
I force myself upright and stare at the two boxes he’s holding. “For me?”
“For you,” he repeats. “Open the big box first.”
I pull open the package to find a pretty summery dress nestled between layers of tissue paper. It’s been so long since I dressed up. Hell, it’s been a while since I even wanted to dress up.
“Are we going somewhere?” I ask hopefully.
“You’ll find out soon enough. Go and get changed. Once you’re ready, you can open the second package.”
“So bossy.”
“I don’t think that’s actually a complaint, is it?”
Grinning, he slaps my ass as I walk my dress into the bathroom, feeling an instant uptick in my mood. I shimmy out of my clothes and into the new garment. I swear there must be some kind of magic in the stitching, because as soon as it slides over my body, I’m transformed from a baby incubator into an actual person again.