I froze.
“Fuck.”
Her head turned, and she looked at me with that somewhat sheepish, somewhat happy look on her face. Jesus, she’d never looked more beautiful than right now. “What’s wrong?”
“Huh.” I cleared my throat. “What?”
“You said the f-word,” she answered simply. Had I? “Did the ice get to your head?”
Definitely not the ice. “What do you mean?”
“The ice,” she explained, taking a quick sip of tea from the cup. “It happens to me when I order iced lattes. It gets to my head if I drink too fast. But never mind. I guess manly men’s brains don’t freeze with sno-cones.”
“That’s what you think of me?” came out of my mouth. “That I’m some impressive manly man?”
“I didn’t say impressive.” She rolled her eyes, but fuck, the corners of her lips turned up again.
“What else do you think of me?” I asked, nudging her shoulder with mine. Something came over me. Something caused by the turmoil inside. I lowered my voice. “Anything that keeps you awake at night?”
Adalyn’s mouth parted. Her tongue snuck out. And I thought, Go on, love. Throw me a bone. Because I wanted her to tease me. And I knew she wanted to, too. I could already taste the words coming out of her mouth, I could already feel them on my tongue.
But then, her gaze moved behind me. Her expression changed.
And just like that, all hell broke loose.
CHAPTER TWENTY-ONE
Adalyn
For a second, I’d thought I was wrong.
That I had to be wrong.
Because how unlucky did I have to be? How very unlucky was I that on the day I was somehow having a breakthrough, on the day I wasn’t feeling like the failure I was—the embarrassment, the total and complete castaway—a reminder had to be flung back at my face?
One moment I was looking at Cameron, getting a little lost in the way his eyes were roaming around my face like he was seeing something, a little part of myself, perhaps even me, for the first time. Sitting there with the tea he’d asked Tony to get me because he remembered I didn’t drink coffee after noon. A warmth that had nothing to do with the tea or the nearness of his body surging, breaking through me.
And the next, poof. Everything was gone.
At first it had been nothing more than a flash of color. A shape I’d told myself not to think anything of. But then, the guy moved, as if his intention was to approach us. His chest faced me, and I knew just how wrong I was. How foolish.
He wore a hoodie with the exact image I’d seen on the energy drink website. The can. The doodle of my face. The slogan: CHOOSE ENTERTAINMENT OVER DIGNITY.
It all came back to me then, the fact I’d never gotten an update from Miami. That I didn’t know when or if they’d taken legal action. What I knew was that there was a guy with my enraged face on his clothes. In North Carolina. So I panicked. My heart dropped to my feet, I felt all my blood leave my face, and I did what I should have probably done that day I arrived in Green Oak, right after I pulled the pin and made my orderly, neat life implode.
I ran.
Or I tried. Because instead, I whirled on the bench I was sitting, tripped over the water keg, and plunged into the ground, managing to squeeze the take-out cup so hard, the lid flew off and the contents spilled all over me.
It wasn’t pretty, and I was sure I’d gone down with a scream.
I should have been mortified, humiliated, really, because I’d been doing a lot of falling and tripping and I was, frankly, sick of it. And yet, even as I went through that hurdle, I kept thinking, Well, at least Cameron will look at me. Not at the man in the hoodie. At least the one person in town who hasn’t seen that horrible video won’t find out this way.
So I remained there, on the ground, like the dumbass I felt I was, catching my breath, and then, just as all the adrenaline started to come down and relief was quickly replaced by shame, Cameron was there.
His hands landed on me, and I didn’t want to look at him, because I was really done with the world. But all I could see was him. Curse after curse left his mouth as he touched and poked and palmed every limb and part of my body in an almost frantic way. Some vaguely there part of me thought to complain, but I was too overwhelmed. By the trip and the reminder of what my life had become. By the fact that there was some guy wearing merch with my face and what that could imply. By the now real possibility that Cameron could never look at me the way he had minutes ago. By… everything.
Cameron moved even closer as he kneeled there, and real, understandable words finally started leaving his mouth. “What the fuck, Adalyn,” he said those deep green eyes meeting mine with a gravity that shouldn’t have been there. Had I tripped so miserably? “Tell me you’re okay,” he demanded. “Did you hit your head?” One shake of my head. “What the fuck happened?” Another bob of my lips. “Why are you not talking, love?” Love. Love? My breath got stuck in my throat. “I saw you looking behind me. Did anyone say something to you?” His expression changed, and he started moving away. “I’m going to—”