This man was my confidant, the one person who never judged me.
“You all right, Miney?”
I shook my head. “I’m drunk. We’re both drunk. That was not a good idea. I’m sorry. I shouldn’t have walked in on you.”
“There’s nothing to be embarrassed about.”
“You’re right, because nothing happened. This never happened. Goodnight, Chewy.”
I couldn’t even look at him.
I padded through the house, back to my bedroom.
What the hell was I thinking?
I squeezed my eyes shut and tried to think of anything other than what we’d just done. My body was still tingling from the sensation.
I could still vividly see the muscles in Finn’s arms straining as he stroked himself.
The way his eyes had watched me with a hunger I’d never felt before tonight.
No. No. No. No.
This was a stupid, drunken mistake.
We hadn’t touched each other—well, aside from a little nipple graze.
Tomorrow we would just act like it never happened. I could do that.
There was no other option.
I’d snuck out of the house early this morning to take Millie for a ride. I’d been unable to get Finn out of my mind now that I’d seen him the way that I had last night. I’d always known he was sexy and that women fell to their knees for him—I’d just never allowed myself to imagine why.
But I liked it, didn’t I?
The things he’d said to me.
The way he’d made me feel.
Watching him fall apart right in front of me.
What kind of woman was I? Here I was, trying to win back my fiancé, and I fell asleep last night, thinking about my sexy best friend.
Millie trotted into the barn just as Finn stepped out of Han Solo’s stall. He had on a pair of faded jeans, his worn cowboy boots, and a navy-blue Henley. His tan baseball hat was turned backward, and the man just oozed sex appeal. It shouldn’t be legal to look that good without even trying. He smiled, flashing his white teeth at me, while his eyes hid behind his gold aviators.
“Did you take her down to the water?” he asked, his tone light, like nothing had happened between us.
It was what I’d asked of him, but I didn’t know how to pretend I hadn’t made a massive mistake myself.
“Yeah, it’s gorgeous down there. It’s a little cloudy today, and she loved it. What are you doing out here?” I asked as I slid down Millie’s body, and he wrapped both hands around my waist and set me on my feet.
“I came to find you,” he said, waiting for me to turn around and face him. He chuckled, like whatever he saw on my face was funny. He leaned forward and rubbed his thumb above the bridge of my nose between my eyes. “Stop worrying, Miney.”
“Is that what you came to tell me? To stop worrying?”
“No. I came to tell you that I spoke to Maddox about an investment property he’d asked if I wanted to partner up with him on, and I thought it might be something that could work for your office space.”
I tucked my hands in the back pockets of my jeans and shifted on my boots. “Really? That was nice of you.”
He leaned forward, his forehead resting against mine. “Stop acting like you committed a crime. It’s not a big deal.”
“What would Carl think of me?” I asked, and he reared his head back like I’d slapped him.
“What would Carl think of you? The dude is probably banging his girlfriend right now. He told you as much. And weren’t you the one talking a big game about finding yourself a lover? You touched yourself. You didn’t rob a bank. Stop overreacting.”
I looked out toward the doors of the stable with views of the gorgeous mountains. I loved being home. Breathing in the mountain and ocean air. That perfect mix of pine and salt water. Seeing the snowcapped peaks in the distance.
“I was drunk. It was a really stupid thing for me to do.”
“It’s never a bad thing to let yourself feel good. You were having fun. You aren’t dating Carl right now. So what if you have a good time? He’s not worrying about what you think, Miney. You don’t know what’s going to happen, so stop letting what he thinks depict what you do. Do what makes you happy. London was the first time I’ve seen you do that in a long time.”
I cleared my throat. “I guess I’ve just had this vision of who I was going to be in my head for so long. And then I took a risk and accepted that position in London, and it cost me everything that I wanted.”
“I disagree. I think you’ve been so hell-bent on believing that Carl is the only way to have the future you want, that you’ve tried to be who you think he wants you to be. And the minute you didn’t do what he wanted, he jumped ship on you. That’s the guy you want to spend your life with?” His words were harsher than usual, and it caught me off guard.