“Don’t cry, lady.” He wiped her wet cheeks and looked down into her eyes, and she saw the truth. He wasn’t sending her away because he didn’t love her. He was sending her away because he did. “I swore I’d do what’s best for you. Always. And you’ll be safer . . .” Far away from him.
Spies don’t get a happy ending, she had to remind herself. Right before she asked but what if they could?
“Come with me.” She pulled back and looked up at him.
“What?”
“Get on the plane. Now. Just . . . come with me.”
He stumbled back like he’d been hit. “I can’t—”
“Can’t?” The word was sharp and ragged. It was going to make them both bleed. “Or won’t?”
He didn’t answer. But he didn’t have to. Zoe saw the truth in his eyes—that she could fight Kozlov and Collins and even Alex. But she was no match for the little boy who was still lining up dominoes on the cabin floor, waiting for them to all fall down. So she didn’t even try.
“Okay then, Mr. Spy Guy.” She forced a smile. She cocked a hip. “I know you must be busy—”
“Zoe—”
“Bad guys to shoot . . . Safe houses to blow up . . .”
“Sweetheart, please—”
She couldn’t let him speak. She couldn’t meet his gaze. She couldn’t stop him or save him or change him. So Zoe did what she’d been doing her whole life: she saved herself.
“I’ll say my goodbyes and get out of your way.”
Was that pain on his face? Or fear? Maybe sadness. She couldn’t tell. She’d known so many Sawyers by that point, but she had no idea how to read the man in front of her. Her eyes started to burn when she realized she never would.
So she leaned against him one last time, felt his arms go around her, and breathed him in.
“Thank you. For the dancing and the lingerie strangling and the . . . all of it. Thank you.” She went up on her toes and pressed a kiss to his cheek, lingered a heartbeat longer than she should have. “I’ll never forget you.”
And then she walked away.
Him
Sawyer’s brain wasn’t working right. Neither were his legs. But his heart was the most messed up of all as he stood there, telling himself it was for the best.
His life was always changing and ever dangerous. Kozlov might have been dead, but there was always some new Kozlov, waiting in the wings. He loved her, but Zoe deserved more than a lifetime of constantly looking over her shoulder. Zoe deserved everything.
Someday, she’d meet a nice man with a nice job and they’d go on nice dates to nice places where absolutely no one would try to kill her. Sawyer already hated the bastard.
He felt a presence beside him but didn’t turn.
“That drive is going to do a great deal of good,” his father said but Sawyer couldn’t take his eyes off Zoe. “From what I can tell, we’ll be able to roll up most of Kozlov’s organization and a few other relevant parties. You should be proud of yourself.”
Sawyer didn’t feel anything. His goal was to never feel anything ever again.
“She’ll be safer in the States, you know.” Away from Sawyer. “She has a life there.” Apart from Sawyer. “She deserves a chance to go back to her world.” Without Sawyer. “And you deserve . . .”
“What do I deserve?” Sawyer snapped.
He knew what his father would say. That they were from different worlds and destined for different lives. That he barely knew her. But his father was wrong. Because Sawyer did know her. He knew her smiles and her laughs and her gambits. He knew her silly eccentricities and her fears. And he knew who he was when he was with her. He liked that guy—was just getting used to being him. And he was going to miss him so much when she was gone.
I’ll never forget you.
Sawyer squeezed his eyes shut and wondered how long it would take to get very, very drunk. Then he felt a grip on his shoulder.
“You deserve to move on,” his father answered slowly. Without Zoe. “It’s hard to do this job if your heart’s not in it.”
Sawyer brushed off his father’s hand. “You’re only saying that because you never loved my mother.”
“No.” His father’s voice was ragged, like he was barely brave enough to admit, “I’m saying that because I did.”
Sawyer wanted to turn and gape but he couldn’t look away from the woman who was almost to the plane. She might stop. She might turn around. And he didn’t want to miss it.