He’s beautiful.
I startle as soon as the thought enters my mind, losing my thread of magic and falling into the water below.
Wolfe looks down at me with a smirk, then joins me in the waves.
“You were doing so well. What happened?”
“I got distracted,” I say, completely mortified.
“That was good for your first time. Let’s do it again.”
It’s easy to find the connection now that I know what it feels like, and within seconds I’m back in the air. Magic rolls around inside me and pours into the night sky as I rise higher above the water. My whole body relaxes as the magic leaves my system, as if with each passing moment I’m reclaiming another year of my life.
I’m not going to die in nine days.
Silent tears roll down my face, and the cool night breeze dries them on my skin. I stretch my arms out and revel in what it feels like to float. To live.
“Come back down, Mortana,” Wolfe says, his voice far away. I look down and see how high up I’ve drifted, but instead of feeling panic, I feel pride.
“What, can’t keep up?” I call down to him.
I hear him laugh. “You really shouldn’t have said that.” With a wave of his hand, the breeze stills, and my connection to it is lost. I scream as I plummet toward the water, such a long way to fall.
I brace for the harsh impact, but just before I hit the water, a current of air slips underneath me and gently cradles me above the surface, right where Wolfe is standing. He looks down at me, his expression unreadable. We watch each other for several breaths, then he gently slides his arms underneath me and places me back on my feet.
“That was good,” he says. “You’re catching on very quickly.” He says the words as if he’s puzzled by them, and for some reason it makes me nervous. I turn away from him and shake my head, try to erase the feeling of being up in the air, because if I don’t, I’m terrified I might realize that this is the most fun I’ve ever had. That this is the most alive I’ve ever felt.
“No,” I say out loud. None of this is real. It’s just the exhilaration of doing something I know I shouldn’t be doing. It’s the relief of knowing I get to live. That’s all.
“What was that?” Wolfe asks.
“Nothing,” I say, turning back to him. “Are we done?”
“Done?” he says, laughing. “That was just a warm-up. Ready for the main event?” His eyes don’t move from my face, challenging me, daring me to follow wherever he wants to take me.
I shiver and push down the fear that turns in my stomach. I can do this. And if I do this, I can live.
“I’m ready,” I say.
eleven
The ocean spreads out in front of us, reaching as far into the darkness as I can see. The tide is low, and we walk far enough out that there are fewer rocks and softer sand. The shore is wet and shines in the light of the moon.
The water seems infinite.
“Don’t you think manipulating the tides feels a little extreme? I mean, can magic even do that?”
Wolfe raises an eyebrow. “Our magic can.”
I don’t miss the disdain in his voice. The judgment.
“You act as if you’re better than I am because you practice ‘high magic,’ but you’re not. The only reason you’re even able to practice that magic is because the new witches have convinced the mainlanders it doesn’t exist anymore.”
Wolfe takes a step toward me. He’s several inches taller than I am, and I have to look up in order to meet his eyes.
“We convinced you we don’t exist anymore. We live on our own, hidden from view, so that we can maintain our way of life. We have to live in the shadows because your weak, fear-driven ancestors were all too willing to give up who they were to appease the masses. You’re all a bunch of cowards.” His voice is low and rough, and his eyes never leave mine.
I lean closer to him. “If we hadn’t created the new order, your ancestors would have been killed and you would never have been born. You owe your life to us.”
“I owe you nothing.”
“Then why are you here?” I demand, daring him to answer. We stare at each other, breathing heavy and red with anger. Then he shakes his head and shoves a hand through his hair before taking a step back and turning away from me. I have so many questions, want so badly to understand his life on this island, but what I need now is to focus on surviving.
“Do you want to live or not?” he finally asks.
“I want to live.”