He grins.
“It’s not funny. I think I’m obsessed with you. Like every other starry-eyed girl in that godforsaken town.”
He laughs.
“Don’t laugh. It’s diagnosable. I’m mad at you, and I lay awake all night wondering if you were sleeping. Or if you’d eaten. After years of holding it together, I’ve finally lost it.” I try to pull a hand up to swipe away my tears, but he’s holding me so tight, so close that I can’t.
I opt to wipe my face on his shirt instead.
“You haven’t lost it. Or if you have, so have I. Because I was wondering all the same things. Shit, I don’t know how many times I got up to check the perimeter of the house. So the answer is no, I wasn’t sleeping.” He chuckles, like that’s funny.
I gaze at him in wonder. “But why?”
“You ask an awful lot of questions some days, Bailey Jansen.”
“I don’t understand, though. You. This. The breakfasts. None of it makes sense to me.”
His smile is different this time, tinged with sadness, brimming with reverence as he touches me urgently, brushing my hair behind my ears. “You’re not used to anyone showing up for you, Bailey. This is what that looks like. I told you I love you. I’ve never loved a woman before. Wasn’t sure I ever would. But now I do. And you and me? We’re a team. You don’t quit on your teammates. You don’t leave a man behind. So now you’re stuck with me. I’m just being patient. Waiting for you to come back.”
My tears fall freely as I listen to him pour his heart out to me.
“It’s like I’ve been searching for something, something to tie me to this new reality. I wasn’t looking for love; I was looking for a purpose. I just didn’t expect my purpose to be you.”
I say the only thing I can say in the wake of his words, in the wake of everything he’s done for me. “I love you, Beau.”
That blinding smile is back, but this time it’s matched with glassy eyes. He nods at me, every motion swimming with love. Admiration. I can feel the affection in everything he does.
And it feels so foreign. It feels so good.
“I told you once that I don’t think anyone has loved me before. But … ” I nibble at my lip. “But I don’t think I’ve ever really loved anyone either.”
His thumbs swipe at my cheeks, brushing away the tears that slip over my skin.
“That’s okay, baby. I can be your first,” he says.
And then he kisses me.
The first, last, and only man to love me.
And I’m okay with that.
42
Beau
Beau: Everyone better show up tonight.
Harvey: YES, SIR.
Beau: You can’t say that. Like, ever, Dad.
Harvey: Why not?
Harvey: … Sir?
Beau: You just can’t. It’s off the table now.
Jasper: REPORTING FOR DUTY, SIR.
Rhett: SEE YOU FOR DINNER, SIR.
Cade: WHY AM I RELATED TO SO MANY IDIOTS, SIR?
Beau: I hate you all. See you tonight.
“Everyone is coming?
“Yes.” I casually slick my hair back in the mirror like nothing in the world is wrong—because it’s not.
“Like, everyone?” Bailey hovers behind me, her hands tucked into the sleeves of the camel-colored sweater she’s wearing. She’s got one arm crossed over her stomach, the other brushing at the bottom of her chin in a steady rhythm.
“Of course. You told me to invite everyone.”
When I peek at her standing behind me, she’s worrying her lip between her bottom teeth and looking a little frantic.
“Right. Of course.”
She’s nervous and scans the bathroom, like there might be something to distract her from her thoughts.
The bathroom is small but freshly tiled by yours truly. White squares with little black diamonds at each corner. A claw-foot tub in the corner. A pedestal sink. This house on a cozy, tree-lined street is full of vintage, old-world charm.
As much as I love my house at the ranch, I have to confess … it felt less me since Bailey came into my life. The hard lines and echoey spaces felt cold. At odds with her there.
This house, though? Warm hardwoods and big windows that the light spills through. The oak trim around every wall reminds me of her tan skin in the summer. And the crystal doorknobs that adorn the French doors that lead into the dining room remind me of the way her eyes sparkle when she’s excited.
Nah, my house at the ranch is the old me.
This one? This is the new me. The me with her. And like I told her, it’s a great investment. Every investment I’ve made in this woman will always be.