I’m aware this paints an enticing picture of Renner. But it’s just pure fact that he looks like the love child of all the great rom-com jocks. His superpower is bewitching people with his puppy-dog eyes and constant, gleaming smile. It’s straight-up sorcery, if you ask me.
There’s just something off about people who smile too much. From the get-go, I had a sneaking suspicion he was too good to be true. And he proved me right.
Let me take you back four years to the first week of freshman year. For a total of four and a half days, I may have developed a microscopic crush on Renner （as I said, sorcery）。 He sat in front of me first period. Every day, he’d turn around, flash me his perfect teeth, and ask to borrow one of my many pencils. I went through an entire package of mechanical pencils in one week, but it was my favorite moment each day.
One morning, instead of asking for a pencil, he slipped me a note that read, Homecoming? Circle Yes or No.
Containing my excitement was a task. Inside I was doing mental cartwheels and air-punches. But on the outside, I just lowered my chin in a controlled nod and circled Yes.
I regretted being so trigger happy when I told Kassie after class, neck spiking with heat at her blatantly unreadable expression.
“I can totally go back and tell him no,” I offered meekly, leaning against the banister for support. “I know I should have asked you first. I just thought you’d be cool with it now that you’re with Ollie. But I get it since you hooked up with him and—”
She shook her head, waving my words away before dashing up the stairs. “Technically, you should have. But he’s so not my type,” she assured as I followed. “Don’t get me wrong, I’m happy for you. I’m just . . . surprised.”
I never imagined I’d have a date to homecoming （even though it was on my freshman bucket list）。 I also didn’t realize Renner saw me as anything but Kassie’s annoyingly uptight friend. Besides, I’m used to being invisible. If our friend group were a rom-com, Kassie would be the main character—the sunshine dream girl with an effervescent laugh. Then you have Nori, who marches to the beat of her own drum, dropping zany one-liners. Then there’s me. I’m not sassy, hot, or fun. I’m not even charming enough to be the uptight, sweater vest–wearing heroine who “just needs to let loose once in a while.” I’m the tertiary character. The overachieving mom-friend who takes care of everyone in the background but does zero to advance the plot.
But I digress. Back to homecoming. Renner and Ollie planned to pick Kassie and me up from her house. We’d ordered pizza and spent the entire evening in her room getting ready, fantasizing about our future double dates.
“Make sure you bring mints. He’s totally gonna kiss you,” Kassie declared, dabbing my nose with translucent shimmer powder.
I lit up, picturing my very first kiss under the scattered lights of the disco ball. “You think so?”
“Oh yeah. And he does this thing with his tongue—” And there it was. Another reminder that technically, Renner had been Kassie’s first. Comments like this made me uncomfortable, even though she didn’t intend it. She was just trying to relate to me. And realistically, it wasn’t her fault I was insecure.
Despite feeling eternally second to my best friend, I felt pretty that night in my blossom-pink satin minidress. Kassie said it accentuated my legs. My cheeks were sore from smiling in anticipation. But when Ollie arrived, he was alone, expression solemn. My eyes immediately welled with tears.
“J. T., umm . . . he canceled last minute. Something about plans he forgot,” Ollie hastily explained before Kassie whisked me inside.
“Something you should know about J. T. is he’s a manwhore. I heard he’s been seeing a volleyball girl, Tessa, from Fairfax,” Kassie told me, dabbing my smeared mascara with a wad of toilet paper.
“Why didn’t you tell me? If I’d known, I never would have agreed to go with him.” I sniffed from atop her bathroom counter.
She let out a shaky breath, hesitant. “You were so happy when he asked you . . . I couldn’t burst your bubble.”
“Ugh, he’s such an asshole. I should call him out,” I said, fists balled in my lap.
“No.” Her tone was firm, eyes wide. “You know what the best revenge is? Having a fabulous night, dancing with all his friends, and forgetting about him entirely.” She held her hand out and pulled me off the counter.
Contrary to Kassie’s advice, I never forgot. I didn’t forgive either.