I wrapped my arms around his neck, feeding that need with the feel of his hair on my skin, of the hard muscles of his shoulders beneath my nails. Liquid heat throbbed in my core, and I pressed my hips to his, desperate to drown the terror threatening to consume me. “Prove it.”
I felt as much as heard his intake of breath, and I buried my face in his neck, biting at his throat. “Prove that I’m what you want.” I ran my hand down his chest, down the hard muscles of his stomach, and cupped his cock. He groaned and I stroked the thick length, liquid heat rushing to my core. “Claim me.”
“Freya, not like this.” He caught hold of my wrist, pinning it to the wall of the building. “Not here.”
Frustration flooded me. “Why not?” I demanded, kissing him. Biting him hard enough that I tasted blood, his groan of pain and pleasure spiking my desire. “Is it because of your father?”
“Freya—”
“Because he’s never had me. Never will have me.”
Shock broke through the haze of desire, because I’d sworn an oath not to tell anyone of the deal Snorri and I had made. But it was as though someone else held control of my tongue. Someone who’d say anything, do anything, to get what she wanted. Panic rose in my chest, but she had too much control and shoved it away.
She kissed Bjorn, hard enough that our teeth clicked. “Our marriage is a lie, a farce.” She raked the nails of my free hand down his back. “We made a deal, Ylva and I. That he’d never touch me and that in exchange, I’d lie to everyone. But the gods know the truth, Bjorn. I am a free woman.”
Never had a greater lie been told, but she told it anyway.
“Then leave with me.” His hand slid up my ribs, cupping my breast. “Right now. Once we’re somewhere safe, I’ll give you everything you want, Freya. I swear it.”
She wanted to say yes. But beneath the want, the covetousness that was consuming me, a more familiar voice screamed, You can’t leave them!
“My family.” The protest came between desperate kisses, my hands roving down his body. “Snorri will make them pay if I run.”
“Then perhaps they should have treated you better.” Bjorn kissed my jaw, my throat. “Geir built his own barrow.”
He’s right, the new voice whispered to me. All they ever did was use you.
But the old voice, the familiar voice, pleaded, Your protection shouldn’t have to be earned.
“I can’t leave.” The words croaked out, my throat trying to strangle them and my tongue wanting to twist them into something else.
“Then we can’t do this.” Bjorn pulled out of my grip, retreating a step so that his back pressed against the building opposite. “I won’t do it, Freya. I won’t skulk around with you in the shadows, living every day a lie while I watch you be changed by my father’s ambition. I’ll have all of you or none of you.”
Fury boiled up in my chest, the purest form of rage that he’d deny me what I wanted. “If you want me free of your father’s shadow, perhaps you should find your balls and get rid of him yourself.”
Bjorn recoiled.
“Can’t stomach it?” I hissed, part of me, buried deep inside, repulsed by the words exiting my lips.
He was silent for a long moment, then said, “Your eyes are red, Freya. Same as they were when you attacked Grindill.”
Burning with crimson fire.
Nausea and revulsion drowned my anger, and I staggered a few paces away before dropping to my knees. “I’m sorry.” I dug my nails into the dirt.
Bjorn’s voice was full of unease as he asked, “What exactly is it that you want me to do?”
Kill Snorri, the new voice hissed. Challenge him and take everything. I gave a sharp shake of my head. “That’s not what I think. That’s not what I want.”
“Freya…？”
I could hear his confusion. His concern.
Oh gods, I was arguing with myself.
Geir’s voice filled my head, repeating mad bitch over and over until I breathed, “There’s something wrong with me, Bjorn.”
I felt the heat of him as he knelt next to me.
“There’s something in me,” I whispered, staring blindly into the darkness. “Someone.”
“It’s Hlin.” Bjorn cupped my face with his hands, searching my eyes. The red must have been gone, for he relaxed. “I know how it feels, Freya. I know what it’s like when the part of you that is theirs takes control. But you can learn to hold them in check.”